“Just because we had sex—once—doesn’t mean it’s okay for you to ignore my boundaries,” she told him furiously.
“My apologies. Of course, you are correct.” He said it so smoothly, too easily, his face a refined mask, as he leaned back against the closed door.
For the first time she hated his blasted composure, and she glared at him. “You’re trapping me in here on purpose. Don’t try to say you aren’t, so you can stop being so damned polite.”
He adjusted the cuff of one of his sleeves. “Politeness is the backbone of civilization. Besides, what else would you have me do? Until I know what you’re thinking, I have no way to respond.” Glancing up from the small task, he speared her with a sharp gaze. “Let me guess: you’ve figured out what I do, from what Diego and I were saying. Haven’t you?”
She threw out one hand in an uncontrolled gesture. After everything that had happened, she felt like she had come full circle, back to the same place she had been the night of the Vampyre’s Ball. Nothing he did seemed out of place or unconsidered, and everything she did felt overdone, out of balance.
“It was rather hard to miss,” she said. “Unlike all the many clues I’ve seen over the last six weeks.”
“And this upsets you.” He cocked his head, studying her as if she were an alien.
Where was his warmth, the passion and emotional openness from earlier this morning? Had it all been an act?
She turned away from him, wrapped her arms around her middle and hunched her shoulders. “Yes. No. I don’t know.”
His hands came down on her shoulders, and she jumped. He said in her ear, “Well, that is definitely a comprehensive range of reaction, I must admit.”
Her body reacted again to the sound of his voice, so close. She felt as if he had just passed a hand down her naked back, and she shivered.
His hands tightened. He said even more softly, “Will you not tell me what is going through your mind right now? I truly don’t have any clue.”
He sounded so patient and gentle, this centuries-old Vampyre who was once a priest.
Who played the piano, loved to waltz, read philosophy and quoted love poetry.
And ran a spy ring.
She closed her eyes. I’m nobody, she thought. I’m not even out of my twenties. I’ve never been anywhere interesting or done anything useful. I’m just a foster brat who got too greedy and cocky, and barely managed to make it out of a tricky situation alive.
“I’m trying to run away,” she whispered. “Inside my head.”
“You promised you wouldn’t. And I told you what would happen if you did.” He ran his lips lightly over the delicate shell of her ear, and she shivered. “I would come after you.”
What if she kept her eyes closed and let herself fall back, and trusted that he would catch her?
Tentatively, she leaned back into him.
His arms came around her, and he pulled her against his chest, holding her tightly. “Don’t stop talking,” he said, very low. “Show me where you are so I can find you.”
“I feel stupid,” she confessed. “I saw the clues, but I didn’t put any of them together.”
“Why would you? Why would any normal person put all of that together?” He kissed her temple. “Does it matter that much to you what I do?”
“Honestly, no, it doesn’t,” she told him.
He laughed a little, a quiet exhalation of breath. “Now I am completely in the dark again.”
She shook her head. “I didn’t say that right. Of course it matters what you do. In fact, I’m fascinated. But when I heard you talking and put it all together, the thing that shook me was—we made love. I made love to you.”
“I remember it all too well.” He laid his head on her shoulder as he cradled her. “I haven’t been able to get it out of my mind.”
She gripped his forearm. “In the moment, I truly felt like I knew what I was doing, and I wasn’t just being impetuous, but you know what? I was being impetuous, and I don’t really know you. That’s what I realized when I listened to you and Diego. And you were right, when you brought this up earlier—I’ve barely gotten over the fact that you’re a Vampyre. We’ve been acquainted for six weeks, and we’ve spent one night together, and . . .” The growing lump in her throat forced her into silence.
“Tess,” he whispered. He rubbed his face in her tousled hair. “I know it’s early days, and we have so much more to learn about each other. But it’s still okay to fall in love with me. I would be so honored if you did, and I would keep all of your emotions safe. I will never betray your trust. I swear it.”
She let her head fall against his shoulder, turned her face toward him and he bent her back and kissed her, and the thing of it was, she believed him.
She really believed him.
She said against his mouth, “It’s hard to let go and stay in one place.”