A very long time ago, when he had still been a young human, Julian had become experienced at putting certain barriers up between him and the rest of the world. Dealing with the constant realities of single combat, and then the more global consequences of war, meant keeping a tight rein on any impulse to empathize.
Even so, when crimes occurred, he never, ever blamed the victim. If you did bad shit, that was squarely on you, and you had better be running hard and watching over your shoulder if it was his job to bring you down.
The whole time he had been down here in the tunnels, he had kept the blame squarely where he believed it belonged – on Justine. And he was determined to get her for it, with a wrath as righteous as any of the gods.
But in that moment, as they stood in the company of the rotting dead and he looked down into Melly’s face, everything in his head and his heart underwent a complete reversal.
She wore a determined expression, her features set tight with endurance, but the shadows around her beautiful eyes were dark with hollows, and something grieving and fragile hovered underneath the surface.
Her expression filleted him.
He thought, this is my fault. All of these dead, all of the trauma that Melly has endured.
I should have known better. I knew Justine was creating some kind of trouble, but I didn’t have any kind of proof that the Nightkind council would accept, so I did nothing. If it wasn’t in my face, I could pretend that I didn’t have to do anything about it.
So everything that Melly has endured and all the damage Justine has caused, it’s all on me.
He had no words that could possibly make anything better. The only thing he could do was get Melly out as fast as he could, catch Justine and bury the dead.
Turning, he picked a path between the bodies to the next tunnel entrance. This time Melly joined him, and together they studied the floor around the entrance carefully.
He was about to suggest that they explore at least partway down the length of the tunnel when she released his hand, walked forward several feet past the entrance and knelt. Spitting on the tip of one forefinger, she ran it lightly across the middle of the floor and settled back on her heels to study the result.
Then she stood and showed him the filthy tip of her finger. “We can go down this way if you believe we should, but I think it hasn’t been used very much. If it had been, the middle of the floor would be worn cleaner than this, don’t you think?”
He did. Giving her an approving smile, he said, “I do, and I think we should move on too.”
She gave him a crooked smile in reply and took his hand again when he offered it. They made their way to the third entrance.
This time, he knew immediately.
The scent of fresh air wafted against his cheek. He strode forward, tugging on her arm. “Come on. I think it’s this way.”
She increased her pace until she was almost running, and it was her turn to tug on his arm. He was more than happy to match her speed. They came to a few more forks, but now the current of fresh air was strong on both their faces.
He caught a hint of briny salt. “We’re somewhere near the shoreline. Can you smell that?”
Her face brightened. “Yes. Oh gods, we’re almost there.”
They came to a curve that was so sharp it was almost a switchback, like a hairpin turn on a mountainside. Rounding the curve, he thought he saw something independent of the illumination from the flashlight.
“Hold up a second,” he said.
With obvious reluctance, she pulled to a stop. He switched off the flashlight, and they waited.
Blackness so dense it was almost velvety pressed against his eyes, until…
Ahead, a lighter gray appeared as his eyes adjusted to the lack of light.
“There!” Melly exclaimed. She clutched his arm. “Do you see it?”
“I do.” Jubilant, he swept her into his arms and hugged her tight.
As the light grew stronger, some of Julian’s jubilation faded. The growing illumination was diffuse and pale, not the sharp halogen glow of streetlamps at night.
If it wasn’t daylight outside, then it would be daylight soon – perhaps too soon for him to be able to leave the protection of the tunnel. He had no protective clothing with him and couldn’t afford to be caught outside without it. Melly might have to go on without him.
From her excitement, he could tell that the thought hadn’t occurred to her yet, so he said nothing. They would have to face the reality of it all too soon.
As they walked on, the tunnel began to shrink in size. The walls on either side of them narrowed, and Julian had to duck his head in order to continue.
“There’s some kind of hole in the ceiling. That’s the way out.” Melly’s voice shook.