“She won’t stop until she or I are dead,” I said. “There is no place I can hide, and even if there was, I’m not running. You saw what she does. If I don’t fight, she’ll go after everyone I’ve ever known. She’s my family and my responsibility. It’s to the death now.”
My throat was so dry, my tongue turned into a dry leaf in my mouth.
“If I lose, I die. If I win, Roland will want to know who nuked his sister. Either way I’m screwed. There are consequences to being with me. This is one of them. By my presence, I’ll endanger you and your people. I know I said things before about wanting warmth and a family, but the truth is that I’m alone for a reason. Once we’re together, you and everyone you know will become a target.”
I couldn’t read his face. I wished I knew what he was thinking.
“I’ll never sit demurely by your side. I’ll tell you exactly what I think and you won’t always like it. I won’t be your princess all snug and safe in the tower you built. That’s just not me. And even if it was, no army in this world could make me safe. If I choose to have children, they may never be safe. That’s the kind of mate I’d make.”
He said nothing. I was rambling. This was important and I was mangling it all to hell.
My fingers had gone cold. All this hot water and I was freezing. My voice came out flat. “Being without you makes me very unhappy. I don’t have enough willpower to walk away. I’ve tried. So, if you want to break it off, I need you to use whatever it is that made you Beast Lord and leave. Don’t tell me what you think I want to hear, unless you really mean it. No hard feelings. Climb out of this tub, get Derek to find me a separate room, and I’ll never bring it up again.”
I looked at Curran. He still wore his Beast Lord face: flat and about as expressive as a stone statue. I was a hair from punching him in the jaw just to see some emotion. Any reaction would do at this point.
“Anything else?” he asked.
“No.”
Curran shrugged and pulled me back to him. “You don’t pick the family you’re born into. You pick the one you make. I already chose my mate and glued her ass to the chair to make sure she knew it.”
He didn’t care. The stupid, stupid idiot.
“This gluing thing won’t keep me put,” I said.
“Maybe I’ll chain you to it next time.”
“Is that werelion humor?”
“Something like that.”
I kissed him. He tasted like Curran and it made me absurdly happy. Everything took a step back: Erra, the dead, the guilt, the fear, the pain. I shoved it all aside. If one of us died tomorrow, at least we would have these few hours. We would make the best of them, and no force on earth, not even my bitch of an aunt, would interfere.
I brushed my hand through his blond hair. “You’re a fool, Your Furriness.”
Tiny gold sparks flared in his irises. “You’re in my rooms in my bathtub naked and you’re still mouthing off.”
Did he expect something different? “Hey, I didn’t kick you or punch you in the throat. I consider this progress. And you haven’t choked me again, which is some sort of record for you . . .”
He grabbed me with a growl. “That’s it. You’re in for it.”
“Very scary. I’m shaking in my—”
He locked his mouth on mine and I decided it was a good incentive to shut up.