I watched the fire that had embraced the building; I watched the purple and green flames lick the roof and reach their slinky arms up to the sky. I saw the red and blue flashing lights of the emergency vehicles that surrounded the mansion, the hordes of people who came, either to watch or to huddle around the ambulances in panic. I watched as the bodies became indiscriminate specks and the flames became tiny orbs of colored light. I watched as the building became nothing more than a colorless speck in the midst of the city lights. I watched as it all disappeared into the blackness of a starless, moonless, hopeless night.
Through it all, I cried; my heart calling to Ryland as he disappeared from my life forever. I clung to Ilyan as my chest was wracked with sobs, my breathing ragged and broken. I drenched his shirt with my tears and any other gross secretions that joined my broken heart. He didn’t seem to care.
Ilyan held me close to him as he flew us through the air, his arms holding me securely. In the back of my mind, I knew that he was singing to me. I could feel the rumble of his chest; hear his deep, comforting voice in my ear. But I didn’t know what was being said, though; I didn’t understand what the words meant.
“Te? ti?e, moje malá. Upokoj se, bu? klidná. S novym úsvitem se svět změní. A kdy? se změní, uvidí?, jaky bychom měli byt, ty a já.” He sang it to me slowly, over and over.
My tears slowed, but the pain didn’t go away. I had lost everything. My father had left me, only to disappear shortly after renewing contact. My beautiful mother had been murdered, a casualty of the war I had been thrust into. Moreover, my best friend, the new love who was so ruthlessly torn away from me—his mind had been erased and all memory of me had been stolen from him.
I was only vaguely aware when Ilyan landed. His arms loosened as he attempted to lower me down, but I held onto him tightly, my heart terrified of losing one of the last things I had. I clung to him like a terrified child, locking my fingers together in a panic.
“It’s okay, Siln?.” He tried to release my arms again, but I only held on tighter.
“No!” I wailed into him, clinging to him. “Don’t leave me.”
“I am not going anywhere. I will be right back.”
I felt his magic surge through my blood stream, and my body instantly relaxed. I sank to the ground, my eyes only barely registering Ilyan’s retreating footsteps. I looked around myself, not really taking in the dirt, dried leaves and pine needles.
I had barely registered where I was—the fire pit—before Wyn kneeled before me. Her pants were torn and covered in dirt, the brightly-colored ‘Queen’ t-shirt burned and ripped at the hem.
“He’s gone.” My voice broke with my tears.
“I know.” Wyn’s voice wasn’t condescending, or comforting, but my heart still rent open to hear it from someone else.
“I failed him, Wyn.” I sank down further, my body falling forward into Wyn’s lap. She wrapped her arms around me, her head resting on my back. I felt her warm breath against my skin, her tears falling like dripping ice against me.
“It’s all right, Joclyn. We will get him back.”
I sat up, throwing Wyn off me, my blood heating to a sudden boil.
“Get who back, Wyn? He’s gone! There is no more Ryland! He’s gone!” I screamed as loud as my sore and broken voice would let me. It was probably a good thing Wyn’s battle-worn face already looked like someone had punched her or I probably would have.
“I was supposed to save him, and I failed. I was supposed to protect him from his father, and I couldn’t. He’s not there anymore!”
“He has to be there, Jos. He loves you so much, he—”
“Loved me. The Ryland who loved me doesn’t exist anymore. I lost my father because of a stupid mark! My mother was murdered because you people cursed me! And now I have lost Ryland, the one person who meant the most to me!” I felt that uncontrollable anger seeping into my soul again; the desire to fight and yell and scream hit much stronger than it should have been.
“Enough, Joclyn.” I heard Ilyan’s commanding voice flow over me; Ilyan’s magical barrier freezing my emotions in place.
I felt the anger vanish, leaving me with the soul-crushing sadness of my heartbreak. I sank into the ground, my body curling in on itself. I ran my fingers over the dirt as I looked to the tops of the trees I had climbed so many times.
“It’s okay, Ilyan; she’s just hurt. She doesn’t mean what she’s saying.” Wyn’s voice was tiny; I could barely feel her hand against my shoulder.
“I know, Wyn.” There was a pause and I heard Ilyan exhale deeply, his magical restraints peeling off me a bit. “It’s time to go. You and Talon are going to carry the tail of the western evacuation and go home through Los Angeles.”