“You think this is funny? That it’s a joke you thought I’d kill you?”
I could see how much it insulted him. I didn’t know what to say and the way he was looking at me made me feel like a worm, squirming around. How could I explain that, for some reason I didn’t get, I went stupid around him? I missed cues. That I knew it wasn’t funny but I didn’t know how to take it back?
He pulled up to the front of our hotel but didn't shut off the car.
“I don’t get you. I don’t understand why everything doesn’t work right where you’re concerned. I don’t want to know. Just get your ass to Harold's office and leave when your date is up.” He leaned over me and pushed the car door open. “Now get out.” He sat back and looked away from me.
“I'm covered in blood? I can't walk through the hotel lobby like this.”
“You’ll get by, somehow, I’m sure.”
I grabbed the towel with me and watched as he sped off. Not the best way to leave things but I would be leaving. My murderer was dead. There wouldn’t be any heartfelt goodbyes, but I wouldn’t remember any of this. I was glad.
Chapter Thirty
At three P.M. today, I would walk into Harold's office and, as he had described it, reenter the system. I would remember nothing of this time after I was reborn.
There was no way I’d miss this meeting, so I was going to head in at one P.M. and sit there, waiting. I grabbed the keys to the Honda and headed out.
I walked out my front door and almost instantaneously, the guards appeared in front of me and a doorway to a cinder block room opened up.
I pulled back just in time to avoid stepping through it but wasn't prepared for the push at my back.
I stumbled through into a room with no doors.
And, for the first time since I'd entered this crazy new reality, no one needed to explain a thing. I knew with an undeniable clarity what had just happened.
Someone had just screwed me over.
I sat with my back against the cinder block wall as I stared at my phone that had service. I'd called the door guard number several times, even though I knew it was hopeless.
The only thing that didn't make sense was who. Harold wanted me gone. Fate had wanted me gone before I'd even joined. The guy trying to recruit me was dead but perhaps someone he worked with? No. I couldn't get the guards on the phone. It had to be someone directly involved with the agency, but why would they want to keep me? It just didn't make sense. Everyone with a say wanted me gone.
I looked down at my phone. Four o'clock. My window had officially closed. I'd be here for another thousand years, minus one moth served. I felt beaten down and defeated. It was an altogether new experience for me, and one I never wanted to feel again.
I wanted to cry. I should’ve, but the tears simply didn’t come. Maybe I’d shed too many already. Was it possible to run out? That’s how I felt. Hollow, like there was nothing left to give.
Finally, in the middle of my small cubicle, the door appeared. I grabbed my purse and my phone as I slowly stood. I looked at both the guards.
“Why?”
They hung their heads and then the one on the right uttered a single name. “Paddy.”
I walked out to my condo, leaving the cinder block room and small chunk of the humanity I had left with it.
***
I walked into the office like I was now doomed to do for countless years to come. The sole purpose of my existence in the world was now to dole out death and pain.
I was hardly in a partying mood when I saw the cake with the words “Welcome to the Club” scrawled across it, but I tried to smile for the people who were at least trying to attempt to embrace me. It was a little late but I'd take hold of the olive branch with both hands.
Even Harold was there, not exactly smiling but I'd learned that was a rare occurrence.
“So you're officially one of us!” Murphy said handing me a slice of cake.
“We're going to be besties,” Luck said, as she came to stand on my other side. “I'm so glad you're staying. Kitty just really wasn't very good female companionship. First thing we're doing Monday is going to Nordstrom’s, my treat.”
“Do you get raises?” I asked, knowing I’d never be able to shop there on what I was getting.
“No, Harold's a real cheapo. You just forgot who you're talking to. Couple trips to Vegas with me and we'll have you fixed up real good.”
“Oh.” At least I wouldn't have to live on hot dogs forever.
Somebody turned the radio on and jacked the volume all the way up on One Headlight by The Wallflowers, while Crow handed out glasses of heavily spiked punch.
And then Fate was there. All conversation stopped making the radio seem especially loud. Kitty tried to hand him a piece of cake, but he declined without saying a word. His eyes scanned the room until they settled on me.
He didn’t come closer or say anything.
Just stared at me for a moment while I stared back. No one spoke.
Finally, after the moment stretched on past uncomfortable to almost unbearable, he shook his head and walked out.
“What's his problem? Who does that?” I heard one of the Jinxes say, after Fate was well out of hearing.
“Someone pour shots!” Luck called from behind my left shoulder. “We need to get this party going.”
Everyone resumed eating but the mood had been lost. I stayed until the little party died out and then I walked out to my Honda and faced the reality of my future.
“Wait up!”
I turned to see Luck running out towards me. “Where you going?”
“The cond...home.”
“No, not tonight.” She hooked an arm in mine and pulled out her phone and called up a door. “So far you've only seen the bad side of this gig. You and Fate aren't the only ones that overlap. I think it's time to see some of the perks.”
The doors sparkled in front of us, a casino visible on the other side. She tugged me through with her.
The minute we hit the floor, I heard the slot machines pick up their pace.
“Some of my favorites are here tonight, over by the craps table. When we get there, you focus on the people with good karma.” She tugged me along with her. I realized that we had become visible to the crowd.
“I can help them win?”
“Oh darling, you have no idea what you can help them do, yet. But it’s not all about them tonight.”
She dug out a $1000 chip from her bra.
“What do I do with this?”
“Seed money. Don't worry, you can't lose today.”
A little cheer went up from a group of three guys at the end of the table. “There's my lady luck!” one of the guys screamed.
“They don't know I'm actually her. They think I work in P.R.,” she whispered as we walked over.
“How do you know who to help win?”
“Me? I just help whomever I like. And I really like them.” She was staring at her little group of men. “Hi, boys! I want you to meet a friend of mine. She just loves to shoot dice.”
An hour later, we were on our third bottle of Crystal, I had a stack of chips in front of me that I couldn't even keep count of and the casino floor was on fire. Every time I touched the dice, I rolled the point of someone with good karma at the table. Every time Luck rolled, she hit one of my numbers. It got to the point that the table only had us two rolling the dice and the people were two deep trying to get bets in.
The laughter was loud, and the spirits were high. Annie, a single mother of two who’d been dragged here on her birthday by her sister, won enough to put both her kids through college. Al, newly retired and here with his wife, won enough to buy their dream house. It would go down as one of the best days of their lives.
And me? I realized that, just maybe, this wasn't the worst position in the world to be stuck in.
Chapter Thirty-One
I placed a fern in my carriage. A potted plant might not seem like much but it was a big step. It meant I was staying. It would be the first mark of me in the condo that had, up until now, been a short-term situation.