“It was a long time ago.”
Well, that was the most frustratingly vague response ever. I tilt my head, looking him over. “She was the girl you were talking about in the sauna,” I say, thinking back on our earlier conversation.
Elias readjusts his position to lay his arm over the back of the sofa, fully facing me. “Yes,” he confirms. “But Catherine and I were never a good match. Our parents wanted us to date; they had a lot of expectations. The feelings just weren’t there between us—although we did hate each other quite passionately for a time. She can be possessive.”
“I gathered that from last night’s party. For what it’s worth,” I say, “I’m glad it’s over between you two.” Elias chuckles like that should be obvious at this point. “But it’s not because I don’t want to compete with a beautiful, yet vicious, blonde.”
“She is quite a force,” Elias concedes.
“I’m worried about my brother,” I continue. “He’s been spending a lot of time with her, and I don’t want him to get beat up by the staff or anything.”
“You should tell Daniel to be careful,” Elias says. “Because if anyone’s going to hurt him, it’ll be Catherine. She has an ugly temper. Do you want me to talk to him?”
I laugh. “No, he’d take that as competition and probably want her more. I’ll try. I doubt he’ll listen to me, though—he’s an idiot when it comes to girls. But if Catherine does anything to him in the next two days, I’m going to kick her ass. Just putting it out there.”
Elias bites down on his lip to hold back his smile. “She should be very afraid,” he says, running his gaze over my scrawny arms. He rests his head on the cushion, staring over at me.
“You look out for him,” he says admiringly. “You must be very close with your family.”
The comment hurts my heart. Up until three months ago the answer would have been an automatic yes. But Daniel and I have stopped talking about the important things. My father and I hardly talk at all. I’m not sure how we messed up so badly.
I blink quickly to prevent the tears from forming. “There was this one time,” I say, staring past Elias, “when I was sitting on the roof outside of my bedroom. It wasn’t a sunrise”—I motion to the scene outside the window—“but it was a sunset. My mother had taken Daniel out to buy new school clothes, and I didn’t want to go. After they left, I climbed out my window.
“When my father came home from work, he panicked because he couldn’t find me. Eventually he poked his head outside my window and saw me perched at the base of the steep slope. I was thirteen, and thought I was in love.”
Elias sniffs a laugh, and I flash him an embarrassed smile.
“Turns out, so did my friend Kieran,” I continue. “She kissed my boyfriend at the buses in front of everyone. I felt betrayed, humiliated. In hindsight, Aaron and I had zero in common, but at the time it was huge.”
“Infidelity can wreak havoc on your life,” Elias says, more seriously than necessary for a story about a girl and her first boyfriend.
“My father’s initial reaction was to call both Aaron and Kieran to tell them off, but I stopped him from making things worse. And then he told me that I deserved better. That I deserved the best. He put his arm around me and said, ‘Kid, you’re going to get everything you want out of life. Once you get past the parts that suck.’?” I stop, sniffling and shaking my head to keep back the emotions. It’s been so long since I thought about my dad—my real dad. The one who loved me before Mom died. I don’t always remember he existed.
“Here,” Elias says, taking my hand to gently tug me forward. I rest my cheek on the collar of his shirt, breathing in the clean, crisp smell of him. Like my mother’s detergent. Like home. “I understand grief better than you can imagine,” he whispers, resting his chin on the top of my head. “Sometimes the beautiful memories are the saddest ones of all.”
I slide my palm onto his chest and find his heart racing. It draws me from my misery, offering me validation. Excitement. Elias wraps his arms around me, and I close my eyes, absorbing the feel of him. The heat of his body. I run my hand up to his collar, playing with the top button of his shirt, listening to how his breathing changes. His arms tighten, and I shift so my lips graze his neck. His jaw. I let my sadness fall away. Let the world fall away.
“I want to know everything about you, Audrey,” he whispers near my ear. “I want all of you.”