chapter 8
Luckily, no one appeared to care about my supposed staring problem last week. Even Lainey continued to pretend I was nothing more than a bug beneath her stiletto. Which meant I still wasn't important.
At lunch, I found Theo in the commons as we both got in line. Everyone had lunch at Hawthorne during the same time period, so there were two lunch counters, with people snaking out behind them. Theo really hadn't made other friends at school yet.
"How about you just come sit at my table?" I offered, assuming the other girls wouldn't mind. There were always a few free seats, I was sure we could make room.
"Okay," Theo said, nodding. Tiny sparkly flecks rained on her tray. We gathered our food and made our way to our destination.
"What are you doing?" Becky asked, alarmed. Theo and I froze as we were setting our trays down. Becky was normally so inviting, having rescued me the other day. I couldn't imagine what I had done to bring on the change. She beckoned for me to lean in so she could whisper to me, so I did.
"She's not sitting with us," she said, indicating Theo with a quick flash of her muddy eyes. Off of my confused look, she continued, "She's a freak. I don't want her bringing the rest of us down." There was no maybe about it, her mind was made up. Becky had become the leader of the group when I wasn't looking. The lipgloss she had been busy applying dangled from her fingertips.
"If you'll just drop her, we'd be happy to have you still sit here," she finished. Funny, I remember her bare faced and only interested in volleyball last year. Now her freckles were buried under thick foundation and she wore a low-cut top. I realized I hadn't been paying much attention at all. My mouth gaped open a little as I pulled back.
I took a second to compose myself. "You really don't have the hair to act like Lainey," I spat, and spun around, walking quickly away.
The word mad didn't cover the emotions coursing through me. I was revolted. It's not like they owed me anything, but it still made me furious. Theo stayed close on my heels, and nearly bumped into me when I stopped.
Surveying the commons for a moment, I looked for a seat. But as usual, it was completely packed. The tables were as cliquey as a movie cliché, too, and I didn't see any empty spots together. I glanced at Theo and she was chewing off all of her lip balm.
"Come on," I said, and we made a beeline for the back wall beneath the windows. It was the only place I could think of. I turned around, and plopped resolutely down against the wall. She followed suit.
"This is a little unusual," she said, adjusting her skirt underneath her. She started taking the cellophane off of her sandwich. "I like it."
"I just don't understand people sometimes," I said. "Or I guess I think I understand them, and then they morph into different people."
She nodded thoughtfully. "Well, you told me you didn't have any friends here."
"I suppose I was right," I said, sighing. "I just didn't realize it at the time."
We chatted for a bit as we were eating our bland cafeteria meal. Theo filled me in about moving to Hell, and about her parents' recent divorce.
"They still love each other," she explained, twisting the cap off of her water bottle and taking a drink. "They just can't live together. They tried to resist divorcing for a long time, but being caught up together just made them fight, even when they were in separate places. Now that they're totally disconnected entities, and they each have their own bank accounts, they get along fine."
"Does your dad still live in Chicago?" I asked.
"No, that's the funny thing," she said. "He lives four houses down from us. He moved here about a year ago. Mom followed him because she thought it would be easier for me. I think I'm just an excuse. It's not like there was anything for me here, really. I'm planning to go to the Art Institute of Chicago."
"Parents like to make excuses," I said, running my fingernail over the scratches in the tray. They had switched from Styrofoam to reusable brown plastic this year, but they were already suffering abuse. "Even when it's more like lying."
Theo nodded thoughtfully, and we both surveyed the busy, chattering mass of people in front of us. Even though we got a few odd stares from some of the tables nearby, pretty much everyone ignored our odd choice of seating. I was growing to like it that way.
I had been trying to ignore Henry as much as possible. I didn't like the effect he had on me, making me forget about what should be important. It was as if he lived in a parallel world that occasionally dipped into mine. Despite whatever promise he had made me give to continue our chat, I had little interest in picking the conversation back up.
Being the new guy, he got a lot of attention, especially from the girls, as I was well aware. It had been my experience that anyone who flirted with one girl, did it with all the girls. And so I tried to be as cautious as possible.
In History, I noticed everyone turning in their desks as he spoke, although I couldn't hear what he was saying. For a fleeting moment I wished I could, and tried to read his lips. His mouth had become an unconscious obsession for me, the first place I gazed when I saw his face.
Ambrose Slaughter, who was sitting next to him, frowned beneath the golden mass of his hair. Ambrose had always been as interesting to everyone as Henry was now, although I had never understood the attraction. He had the personality of a dripping towel. I turned back around in my seat, scribbling a tornado in the margin of my History notes.
In Art class, I got around to apologizing to Theo for Becky and the others at lunch. I hadn't wanted to mention it in the lunch room, worried it would bring up hurt feelings. But she didn't seem fazed.
"It wasn't right for them to act that way," I said.
Theo shrugged, putting the finishing touches on a feather of a bird in her book.
"I'm used to being picked on, Ariel," she said softly. "It's not a big deal. People leave me alone here, most of the time. I don't really care what they think of me as long as they don't say it. I was getting tired of being called Tinkerbelle every day."
"But Tinkerbelle's basically a fairy pinup," I said. "That's like a compliment."
She smiled slyly and shook her head.
"I was teased some last year," I said, turning my art gum eraser over in my fingers. "By you don't have to guess who," I continued, and nodded towards Lainey. "She's actually being nice to me this year so far in comparison. You know how you said you weren't Goth enough or normal enough for people? That's how it is here. I just never realized it before, back when..."
I trailed off. I hadn't mentioned Jenna once to Theo, and I preferred to keep it that way. To her credit, she never asked, although I assumed she had heard something about it.
Henry sauntered past our table then, causing me to straighten. I had gotten to the point where I could tell it was him just from seeing him walk in my periphery vision. He started digging in the supply cabinet behind us. Not wanting him to hear me badmouth his new best friend, I changed the subject.
"I think I'm going to fail Geometry this year," I groaned. "This morning Mr. Vanderlip held me after class to lecture me about my abysmal quiz score."
"That's no good," Theo said sympathetically. "I'd offer to help, but I don't do that great in math myself. I usually pull a little over a C."
"He told me I should get a tutor," I said. "But I don't know where to find one."
"Maybe ask one of the seniors?" she suggested.
Suddenly, Henry came around and put his elbows on the side of the table across from me. He leaned his face in his hands, his fists squishing up his cheeks. I tried to ignore how cute it made him look.
"May we help you?" I asked, and I heard Theo snicker beside me.
"Geometry is my second favorite subject, right up there next to physics," Henry said. "If you ever need any help, I'd be happy to offer my qualified services." He grinned at me, turning his charm up another notch.
"You want to be my tutor?" I asked, raising my eyebrows. The day was suddenly veering off into the bizarre.
"Sure, why not?" He stood up, and tapped his knuckles on the table. He had beautiful hands, I noticed, the rigid veins trailing like rivers beneath his skin. Really, he had beautiful everything. "If you can handle being around me for long without wanting to run far away."
"I don't know if that's possible," I said dryly. Though I was attempting teasing, I could feel my pulse racing in a peculiar way. Suddenly his attention didn't seem so unwanted. He lowered his voice to a throaty whisper and gazed into my eyes.
"Maybe I won't let you run away."
My throat tightened, my breath catching. I had no idea what to say. I couldn't look away from him.
After a second, his face broke into his usual smile, his eyes softening. "Okay, that was too big bad wolf, huh? I try for cool and it comes out corny."
"It was a bit corny," I pretended to agree. It had not been the least bit corny. "But I'd be grateful not to flunk." I really did need the help, I reasoned with myself. So what if it came from someone cute? It didn't make the potential knowledge any less useful. As long as I could focus enough on the math to retain it.
"Good. Here's my number." He flipped to a blank page in my sketchbook and scribbled the digits upside down, so that they were right side up for me.
"Text me and tell me when is a good day and time for you," he said.
He picked up the reference book that he had gotten out of the supply cabinet and headed back to his seat. My mind was foggy, as if I'd just been dosed with tranquilizers. A heady sensation of giddiness was speeding up my torso.
I ran my index finger over the penciled numbers, not believing they were real. The graphite smudged a little. Theo wacked me on the arm, knocking me out of my reverie.
"Ow."
"He totally wants you, you know that right?" Her voice was high and excited. "What I just witnessed was basically verbal foreplay."
"He does not want me!" I said in a loud whisper. The girls at the next table glared at us; I tried my best to smile so they would look away.
"Lainey has him tightly ensnared in her web," I continued, wiggling my fingers like spider legs. "There's no way to extricate him from that. If I so much as lay one finger on Henry, that finger is as good as torn off."
Henry put one knee on his seat. He looked back at me and quickly flicked his eyebrows up, smiling again as he shifted and sat the rest of the way down.
"Yeah, you just keep on denying it," Theo said, whipping her sketchbook open with a flourish.
The whole walk home, I debated my interpretation of the scene between Henry and me. With Jenna no longer around, it was possible that I was gullible. She had always been my logic for me, offering me advice that was more often than not very solid. Now that I didn't have a person to bounce ideas off of (I liked Theo, but I didn't feel completely comfortable talking to her about that stuff), I didn't trust my own feelings.
At dinner, both of my parents were home for once. It had been a while since I'd seen them eat together. Since my birthday, in fact, if cake could be considered a meal. I assisted Hugh in making spaghetti. As the garlic bread baked it made the whole downstairs smell heavenly. I set the plates and silverware out on the dining room table.
"Use up the party napkins," Claire suggested, breezing into the room and kissing my dad on the cheek. She tossed her briefcase and laptop on the counter.
I took the brown happy birthday napkins out of the drawer and nestled them beneath the forks and knives, glad to get rid of them. And to forget all about that strange day, and the dream that had given me more questions than answers.
Around the dinner table, I prepared my proposal, wanting to get it right.
"I got a D on my first Geometry quiz," I said. "And I thought I knew the material, too." I never would have been so open to telling them before.
Claire immediately crinkled her nose, a common gesture that also occasionally appeared on her sister's gaunt face. It meant annoyance, a rift in the predictable flow of her life. But I stopped them before they could start the usual "try harder" math lecture.
"So would it be okay for me to have a tutor from school over this week?" I asked. "Mr. Vanderlip, my math teacher, suggested it."
"Who's the tutor?" Hugh asked with some suspicion, fork poised in the air.
"Henry Rhodes," I said, trying to remain calm. Just saying his name made overexcitement appear in my voice. "He just moved to Hell."
"A boy?" Claire asked, in the tone of voice she would have used had I suggested a wild animal. Maybe she thought the two were one in the same.
"Yes, I believe so," I said.
"I don't know about that..." Claire said, leaning back in her chair. I watched the little vein in the middle of her forehead pulse.
"I need the help," I pleaded. "Without it, I'm sure I'll flunk. And Henry is in all of my Honors classes. He's smart. And he offered. It would be totally free, no strings attached." At least, I hoped so.
Hugh and Claire looked at each other. It was one of their moves that made me think they communicated by thoughts.
"All right," Claire said finally, pushing her plate away. "But I want him to meet one of us, first. If he's just some grabby-handed little..."
"He's not," I said firmly. "I wouldn't be asking if he was. I have better judgment than that." Her raised eyebrow indicated she wasn't so sure about my judgment.
"You said they just moved here?" Hugh asked in passing.
I nodded, dipping a piece of bread in the leftover sauce puddle on my plate.
"I went to school with a Phillip Rhodes, from first grade on up. I think we graduated the same year. But I know he left after high school, when he got married." A very thoughtful look had crossed my father's face, a skinny line appearing between his eyebrows as he gazed off into space.
"Cheryl Glass, wasn't it?" Claire asked him.
Hugh nodded. "Yeah, I think so," he said.
"Biggest snob in our school," Claire divulged. "She acted like she invented the side ponytail." It sounded like a familiar story.
"Henry said something about his parents moving back here. It's probably the same family," I told them.
For some reason, Hugh looked troubled.