Oh, dear Lord...
While staring aimlessly at the dark floor, I forced slow measured breaths through my nose. What happened to me? I had only ever experienced such a sensation in the process of healing a patient, and then, from years of training and experience, it was always safely controlled. But tonight, it had come out of nowhere. Overtaken by desire, I had nearly let it pass unhindered into Henry. Thinking about what he might have done in response to an unexpected rush of fire made me shudder. At that very instant, he would have known I wasn’t normal, that maybe I wasn’t even entirely human.
“You stupid girl!” I muttered into the darkness.
Henry was my greatest ally against Nathan Crowley, and I had just come unfathomably close to trading his help for certain condemnation. Not to mention the otherworldly consequences for breaking yet another law by revealing my identity in a fit of passion.
When the dizziness started to fade, I straightened in the chair and gazed toward the one window in my apothecary. Despite living amongst humans all my life, and being partly one myself, I had never before felt such disparity between our kinds as I did right now. Even the confrontation with Nathan on the road to Brighmor hadn’t left me feeling so estranged from all of humankind.
Tears burned in my eyes, and without thinking, I traced one finger across the line of my lips. On several occasions, my mother had warned that it would be too difficult to hide my gift from a husband. But in all that time, she’d failed to explain how just one kiss could kill me.
Pushing up from the chair, I hobbled over to the door in search of the crutch. Henry would be back soon and quite possibly hoping to pick up where we had left off. By then I would be safely upstairs, trying my hardest to forget how much I had enjoyed the feel of his mouth on mine.
Back in my room, I undressed down to my shift and crawled into bed, opting to take the coward’s route by faking sleep rather than having to face him again so soon. The morning would suffice to hear whatever information he had gained, once I was rested and not at risk of shaking all over if he stood too near.
A good hour must have passed before he finally came up the steps. I curled up on my side, intentionally turning my back to the door. He knocked softly and receiving no reply, opened the door just enough to see that I was in bed. For several minutes, he stood staring at my back while I worked to keep my breathing slow and steady.
“Good night, Selah,” he whispered into the dark. He then pulled the door closed and crossed the hall to his own room.
Chapter Ten
The Tenth Command
The next day I stayed in my chamber under the pretext that my toe needed time to heal rather than being further aggravated by tromping up and down the stairs. In truth, I hadn’t yet managed to banish last night from my thoughts, and so opted for the next best option of avoiding Henry’s company for as long as possible. This plan worked until mid-morning when a series of raps sounded on the door.
“Come in,” I called, thinking it to be Mary returning with the tea I’d requested.
Nerves jumped beneath my skin when Henry entered instead, a tray precariously balanced between his chest and one arm. Setting the tray on the bed, he nudged it close to me, and then sat down on the edge of the mattress.
“How is the patient this morning?”
A deep blush crept up my neck. “Very well, thank you.” I forced a shaky smile. “Did you discover anything last night? I must have fallen asleep by the time you returned.”
He gave me an odd look before turning his attention to the teapot. “Whoever left last night started toward the road. I barely caught sight of her skirts when she heard me coming and slipped into the adjacent woods. I searched for an hour without further sign of her.” Tipping the pot, he filled one cup with the steaming brown liquid. “And I’m afraid Mrs. Ryan has equally poor news. After interviewing the maids, she has reported that they have each denied any knowledge of the bottle, or who might have made it.”
“Then one of them is lying.”
A generous spoonful of sugar went into the cup next, same as I would have done. “I believe you’re right. But without more evidence there’s little to be done other than keep our eyes open for now.”
I frowned at the idea.
“Don’t worry, the culprit will reveal herself sooner or later.” He handed me the cup, which I gratefully accepted, tilting it toward my mouth for a small sip. “And we’ve something else to discuss.”