His chest tightened. “Maelea, I need to talk to you about later.”
She eased back and looked up with a furrow between her perfect eyebrows. “Why doesn’t that sound all sweet and sexy like I want it to sound?”
Because she was smart. He let go of her when she stepped back. “I told you yesterday that I only have six months to find Atalanta.”
“I remember.”
“I’m running out of time. If I don’t go now I could find myself in trouble.”
Understanding dawned immediately in her eyes. “I’ll go pack.” She took a step around him. “How long should I—?”
He snagged her arm, turned her back to him, awed by the fact she didn’t even hesitate. “No.”
“What?”
He reached for her other hand, laced his fingers with hers. Tried like hell to find the right words and knew he never could, so he just said what he’d already decided. “I don’t want you to come with me.”
Confusion crossed her face. “Why not? I thought you needed me? I thought last night we decided—”
He tightened his grip on her hands. “I do need you. More than you will ever know. Which is why you have to stay here.”
“Gryphon—”
“Just listen to me. I used you. At first it was to get out of the colony. And then when I realized how you calmed me, I used you so I could think clearly. I was even willing to use you in spite of what might happen to you along the way, but not anymore. All that time at the colony, after Orpheus brought me back, when he’d lost Skyla…I didn’t understand what he was going through, how he could hurt so bad after just finding her. But now I do. I can’t lose you like that, Maelea. I won’t put you at risk.”
“But you need me if you’re—”
“I need you alive. I need to know you’re safe. If Atalanta has any idea what you mean to me, she’ll use you against me. She’ll hurt you, and I can’t—won’t—let that happen.”
Worry filled her eyes. “But—”
“This is not about you not being strong, sotiria. You’re the strongest woman I know. The bravest too, to face down not only me, but daemons and hellhounds and, skata, my brother.” He tried to smile, knew from her worried expression it didn’t help. “This is about knowing that when I’m finally free, I have you to come back to.”
“But how will you be able to focus without me there to block the darkness?”
“Look in my eyes, Maelea. They’re clear. For the first time in months. I’m not going to lose that when I’m gone. Not if I know I’ve got you to come back to. If I’m going to find Atalanta, I have to let the darkness pull me toward her.” He brushed his thumb across her smooth cheek. “But I’m not afraid of it anymore. I know I can fight it now. Thanks to you.”
She stared at his T-shirt, her expression so filled with worry and dread, he let go of her hand, threaded his fingers in her hair, stepped close, and tipped her face up to his. “I’m coming back. I promise you that. This is real. This is everything to me. Now that I know what I have to live for, I’m not about to lose it.”
Her eyes slid closed. And when he brushed his lips over hers, she gripped his elbows and kissed him back, telling him with her mouth what he already knew in his heart.
She was his. For better or worse, for however long they had together. She was his alone.
He wrapped his arms around her, held her tight. Her hands slid up his back. Her fingers gripped his shoulder blades as she turned her head against his chest and he rested his cheek on her hair.
“Will you wait for me?” he asked.
“That depends,” she said with a hitch to her voice. “How long do you plan to be gone?”
He smiled and hugged her closer because he recognized the teasing in her words. And the heartache. “As short as possible.”
She pushed back again. “How will you get to her? She has daemons all around her. What will you—?”
He placed his fingers over her lips. “Don’t think about it. I don’t want you to worry.”
“But—”
“I know how she thinks. I spent three months with her. I’ll find a way.”
Her gaze raked his face. He couldn’t tell what she was thinking. Only feeling. She hated this. She was scared. She didn’t want him to go.
“I’m coming back, Maelea. I promise. My heart beats because of you. It will always find its way back to you.”
Her eyes filled with tears. She pulled him close again, held on tight. So tight, he felt her everywhere. And as the waves washed against their feet, he knew no matter what happened, this was the best moment of his life. He was loved. Not because of his title. Not because of what he could do. Even in spite of everything he’d done in the Underworld. He was loved simply for who he was.
“Come inside and help me gather my things?”