chapter Fifteen
I CUT OUT OF THE rec room early, slogging myself up the stairs to my unit instead of taking the lift. I didn’t like riding it alone. That cramped, mobile space weirded me out. After I put down my bag, I crashed on my bed, allowing the day to wash over me.
With all the guy drama renting too much space in my head, I’d almost forgotten about the headmaster’s vague speech today. Normally, Jace would be upset over something like that, accusing him of some conspiracy concerning the Narcos. But lately, ever since his change, he seemed to be more focused on me.
I didn’t think the Narcos were up to no good—at least not like Jace did—but the headmaster dodging the one thing we all truly wanted to know irked me. Why, after almost twenty years of living in segregated havens, were the Narcos here on a mingling mission to create peace that had already been established? Could Jace’s theory be right, and they really wanted to harness our power?
Great. Now I was reaching. Or, I just wanted anything else to think about. I was tired, ill feeling, and sick of trying to figure out what to do about Reese. Obviously, he’d made my decision for me. He didn’t feel what we shared was worth trying to work out. He didn’t even think I was worth the effort of talking things through. Well, if he was through with us and already moving onto another girl, I wasn’t going to reject and hurt my best friend while waiting for Reese to get over himself.
I admitted that what had happened sucked. But it wasn’t my fault. If he couldn’t see that, if he was too hotheaded to allow me an explanation…hell, if he was too proud to dump me face-to-face, then I’d give Jace the chance he asked for. At least someone in this sordid situation could be happy. And maybe, after I got Reese out of my system, I’d find that the feelings I’d been forming for Jace had been real all along. And that Reese—someone different, like me—had swooped in and blindsided me.
I looked at my reflection in my dressing mirror, nodding to myself in finality. We’d only spent a week together. It wouldn’t be that hard to get over him. But what a wickedly hot week. I banged my head against the mirror.
Frustrated, I threw myself across my bed and tossed my boot at the dial, outing the crystal lights.
For the rest of the week, I promised myself I’d focus on my studies. I buried myself in work from Mr. Liam’s class, taking on extra projects, only pausing long enough to sleep and meet the triplets in the janitorial basement for our secret training sessions. We’d decided sparring twice a week was the max. Any more, and we’d run the risk of getting caught. Even though I thought sneaking around was a bad idea, I loved being able to spar again. I vented my frustrations through my fists.
Nick quickly became frightened of me.
My Charge surpassed theirs. And even though I didn’t use my power at its full capacity, since I never shifted, I still won most matches easily. I purposely backed off, allowing Nick to whip me a couple times so he’d stop commenting on my “mad” skills.
As far as teachers went, Mr. Liam was actually cool. I loved learning how to infuse crystals, using my Charge in different devices to make them run on electricity instead of steam. I began working on my own private project. Mr. Liam was the professor who’d worked with Devon to develop the contraptions for Cogs, and he’d agreed to help me, also.
I hadn’t had time to think about my strange white power, which was good in some ways—I didn’t worry about it. But I was still concerned it would appear during my shift. And I couldn’t avoid that forever. Jace had begun asking me to show him my Kythan form. I deflected his questions by expressing how strange it was for me at this point. He didn’t fully understand, but allowed me to have my weird quirk, remaining in his human form most of the time, too. I assumed to make me feel less weird around others.
Like Devon and Mr. Liam had infused crystals with Charge in order to contain our power, I wanted to invent something that could absorb mine. Something small that I could wear or carry in case my power began getting out of control—the way it had during my first shift. Something that could divert the power away from me. I had no idea how to go about doing this, so I dove into my studies, learning everything I could about energy transfer.
Jace kept his promise, taking our relationship slow. He hadn’t attempted to kiss me again, but we held hands, sat together during dinner and breakfast, and even studied together. It really wasn’t any different than how our relationship had been before, except for the way he looked at me sometimes. And how he’d touch my hair, caress my skin, or kiss my hand. I wasn’t going to lie and say I didn’t feel anything when he was near me—the boy was hot. And maybe if I’d never met Reese and shared that amazing week with him, being with Jace would feel like enough. But when I was with him, I couldn’t help feeling like there was a void.
Reese got closer to the Shythe girl, as well. They sat together at every meal, and in every class. I never saw him hold her hand or kiss her—I never watched for that long. Whenever I saw Reese, I’d turn and go another way. I also tried my best not to look at him during class. Being so near him I felt raw, like my soul was an open wound being submerged in salt water. At times it was hard to breathe.
By Friday, Kythan everywhere were anxious for the weekend. We had a curfew, midnight, but no one seemed to mind because we actually got to leave the Academy grounds. Lana was beyond excited as she talked about finally seeing Devon, so we made plans to go to Cogs.
Although I kept in contact with my mom through my communicator, she wanted to see me in person. I felt like I should allow her to see with her own eyes that I was alive and well and that life at the Academy was safe. So I made a separate set of plans to visit her on Saturday.
I only had to make it through my last class, my power training block, and then this horrible week would be over. I finished stretching out and stepped onto the mat with the rest of the students. Our instructor, Ms. Ceylon, eyed me from behind her whistle.
“Harkly,” she called out. “Front and center. You’re power matching Patcher today.”
My heart sped, hammering in my ears as I heard Reese’s last name. I looked to the side of the mat, and he took his place in front of the targets. Great. Fighting with power had been outlawed since the Treaty Act, but we still tested our power levels, training to become more powerful Kythan. Reese was the worst person she could have pitted me against. He knew all my weaknesses.
I slowly sidled up beside him and shook out my hands. He glanced over, but didn’t say a word. As his arms ignited with a red glow, I turned up the juice on my Charge.
He ripped a ball of Flame across the gym, hitting the target dead center.
“Nice, Patcher,” Ms. Ceylon said. “Harkly, your turn. Just aim for the center like Reese.”
I really didn’t like her right then. I held out my hand, shaking a little. God, why did he have to be such a showoff? He knew I couldn’t blast that stupid target. I mean, I could, but then I’d risk releasing too much energy. Probably even blast the target to shreds. I quivered with restraint as I released a bolt. It skipped along the mat and crashed into the wall.
Ms. Ceylon blew her whistle. “Nice try, Harkly. But no one’s beat Patcher yet. Keep practicing.”
I glared at Reese, and he craned an eyebrow, a smug expression plastered on his face. So what if he showed me up here? What did that prove? I doubted he could beat me if no one else was around. No, that wasn’t true. I’d never gotten to spar with him. But he knew I couldn’t take him on in front of everyone. Punk.
He sauntered his cocky self off the mat over to the Shythe girl, and my insides flamed. I blew out a deep, cleansing breath and took a seat on the bench for the rest of the block.
After power training let out, Lana and I hurried to our room to get changed. She wanted desperately for me to dress up with her and wear one of her corsets, and I finally conceded—picking out a light pink one with lace trim. It was way too perky for my sulk, but maybe it would make me seem less downhearted.
We met Jace and Nick in the back of the Academy, where we were allowed to store our vehicles, and I rode with Jace to the club.
Once we were in Cogs, Lana ran up to Devon and jumped into his arms. Yeah, she was definitely getting serious about him. They fit together so well it made my heart ache, missing that feeling for myself, although I was truly happy for her.
Glancing away from them, I studied the lighting system above my head, looking at it differently now that I understood—somewhat—how it worked. Jace came up beside me.
“Come on,” he said, taking my hand. “Let’s dance.”
I looked around, expecting to see Reese, but he was MIA. I laced my fingers through Jace’s, trying not to feel guilty. It was apparently—at least for Reese—over between us. I needed to move on. I wasn’t using Jace as the rebound guy, he deserved better, but I was confused about how to behave around him. I hoped he’d discover he’d been wrong about his feelings for me and that soon things would go back to normal between us.
I finally nodded. “All right.” Then I allowed him to lead me to the floor where Lana and Devon were dancing.
Almost a week ago, Jace had held me the same way he did now, and my world had shattered. My stomach knotted as he drew me closer. I tried to shove my unease away—telling myself I had no reason to feel ashamed—and wrapped my arms around him tighter.
We swayed to the slow music. An orchestra of violins and guitars engulfed us as steam swirled. I attempted to lose myself in the warmth of his embrace. I felt comfortable in his arms, protected. But just like the night of my birthday celebration, dancing with him felt off, strange, and like something was missing.
Jace pressed his lips to my forehead, leaving them there as he cradled me to his chest. He smelled like wind and ocean, with a hint of something sweet that was only Jace. His head pulled back, and I looked into his eyes as he moved closer. I panicked. Could I kiss him again? I wanted to. I wanted to kiss him freely this time, without Reese between us, and discover if I could feel for him what he felt for me.
But before our lips touched, someone interrupted our trance. A Narco stood beside Jace, one that I’d seen at the Academy. “Can I cut in?” he asked, lifting his brow.
Jace squinted at him, then looked to me. I shrugged. “I don’t mind,” I said, disappointed and a little relieved at the same time. I hadn’t been sure if I could actually follow through with the kiss.
“Yeah, that’s fine, man,” Jace told the Narco. “But she’s mine for the rest of the night.” He made his statement clear by kissing me on the cheek before walking away.
I smiled to myself, thinking Jace had come a long way if he was levelheaded enough to allow a Narco to dance with me rather than picking a fight in the middle of Cogs. Maybe he was accepting that we could live in peace, after all. Or maybe he was trying to prove something to me. Either way, I was relieved.
The Narco nodded his head once to me, and I moved closer, allowing him to take me in his arms. He was taller than Jace and even Reese, so I felt awkward with my head pressed against his chest. But he was being gentlemanly, keeping his hands along my back. I guess he just wants to dance.
Before we could become comfortable with one another, someone else near us asked to cut in. Are you joking? Lana’s pink corset must have made me look like a hot commodity. I backed away, but then froze as Reese took the Narco’s place.
The club suddenly felt ice cold as the blood drained from the top half of my body. His hands hesitantly clasped my waist, but he kept a small distance between us. There was no warmth—no Narco power emanating from him. I urged my heart to calm as I closed the gap, molding my body into his embrace. He took a sharp breath.
Reese kept his head forward, eyes trained on something…other than me. Fine. I swallowed my pride and rested my head against his shoulder. His body stiffened.
My mind reeled, but I had to think of something to say. “How’re you liking the Academy?” Lame. But I was only trying to break the ice shield around him.
He huffed. “It’s all right.” He swayed us back and forth, but didn’t say anything else.
I timidly ran my hands along his back, reveling in the feel of his muscles beneath his leather jacket. I squeezed my eyes shut. “Reese…”
“Don’t.” He drew away from me a little.
“Then why are you dancing with me?” I looked into his eyes. They were still focused away from me.
He gritted his teeth, a muscle feathered his jaw. “You’re a good dancer.”
“Bull.” I shook my head. “At least give me the chance to expl—”
“Explain?” Reese finally looked at me, his eyes fire red. “I know what your explanation is, Dez. Jace kissed you, you didn’t see it coming, you panicked.”
“Yes. I panicked.” I sucked in a deep breath. “I didn’t know what to do.”
“So you kissed him back?” he said, his eyes glowing fiercely. “I saw the way you kissed him. No matter what, I knew Jace was my competition. I just thought we had something.” He turned his head away from me, his lips pressed in a hard line.
I opened and closed my mouth, my words dying on my tongue. I had kissed Jace back. I still didn’t understand why, other than I’d been caught off guard and I had panicked. But I couldn’t repeat Reese’s excuse back to him.
He stopped dancing and took a step away from me. “This was a bad idea.” He turned to go, but before he left, he added, “You and Jace make a cute couple.” Then he stormed off the dance floor, leaving me speechless and shaken.
So that was it. One mess up from me and everything between us was over. I hugged my waist as I inched through the horde of dancers. I pressed my back to the mirrored wall, hiding behind the filter of steam. Being raised by the Narcos, Reese’s pride had won out. He really was one of them, after all.
I slipped off the dance floor and out of the club. I wanted to run back to the Academy, but I knew Jace would freak if I disappeared. God, I hated that I could never do what I wanted, when I wanted.
Anger burned in my chest, replacing my guilt. I hadn’t meant to hurt Reese, but he wouldn’t give me the chance to redeem myself. His stubbornness infuriated me, boiling deep in the pit of my stomach. I marched back into the club and searched for him.
Reese was talking with his Narco buddies along the far wall. He wanted to play cruel and callous guy…fine. He had that Narco act down. But I was part Narco, too.
I took off toward him, ready to tell him off right in the middle of Cogs. He’d hear my side whether he wanted to or not. I was halfway across the club when a hand clasped my arm and halted my determined march.
“Hey,” Jace said, stepping in front of me. “What’s wrong?”
I closed my eyes, urging the anger burning in my chest to calm. My body shook, and I knew I had to get a grip. “Nothing,” I said and opened my eyes.
Jace’s forehead furrowed, and his eyes searched mine. “Bullshit. I know when you’re upset. What happened?”
I huffed out a long breath. He knew me too well and wouldn’t believe I wasn’t mad. “I’ll take care of it, Jace.” I glanced around his shoulder. Reese’s eyes caught mine, and flames ignited my blood.
Calm down. I was scared my eyes would shift red.
Whipping around, Jace followed my gaze. He turned back toward me. “Did he do something to you?” His nostrils flared, and his eyes lit with blue fury. “I’ll kill him.”
He released me and started in Reese’s direction.
Shit!
Panicking, I latched onto his arm. “Jace, no.” I pulled against him as he forged forward. “It’s not what you think.” I couldn’t get him to stop. I’d messed up. I shouldn’t have looked at Reese. Crap. I shouldn’t have come back in the club at all with my emotions running high.
Jace was almost to the other side of the room, and I had to do something before he attacked Reese. My mind reeled. I jumped in front of his path, and he stopped. Then I grabbed his face and planted my lips on his. His lips were firm, unyielding to mine at first, as if I’d shocked him. Then I felt him give in. He cradled my face between his palms, and his lips parted against mine.
As we kissed, I maneuvered his back toward Reese, hoping he’d forget about him if he didn’t see him. After a several seconds, I pulled away. Jace’s eyes shone bright blue, and he smiled. I smiled back and quickly slid my eyes in Reese’s direction.
Reese leaned against the wall, his eyes and hands blazing red. The beer bottle he held heated, taking on the red glow…then shattered.