“What did you do to me?” she said, planting her feet and standing. “When you touched me and it hurt so bad and I passed out and—and then again today. What’s causing it? What’s happening to me?”
“Calm down, Miss Linh.”
“Why? So you can lie to me some more, just like you lie to the prince?”
“If I have lied, it has only been to protect you.”
“Protect me from what?”
Dr. Erland steepled his fingers. “I understand you’re confused—”
“No, you don’t understand anything! A week ago, I knew exactly who I was, what I was, and maybe that was a worthless cyborg, but at least I knew that. And now…now I’m Lunar, I’m a Lunar who supposedly might have magic but can’t use it, and now there’s this insane queen who for some reason wants to kill me.”
SPIKING LEVELS OF ADRENALINE, warned her control panel. RECOMMENDED COURSE OF ACTION: SLOW, MEASURED BREATHS. COUNTING 1, 2, 3…
“Please, calm down, Miss Linh. It is, in fact, a good thing that you were selected to receive this lock.”
“I’m sure you’re right. I just love being treated like a guinea pig, don’t you know?”
“Like it or not, the lock has been beneficial to you.”
“How?”
“If you would stop yelling, I would tell you.”
She bit her lip and felt her breath stabilizing almost against her will. “Fine, but tell me the truth this time.” Crossing her arms, she sat back down.
“Sometimes you are quite unnerving, Miss Linh.” Dr. Erland sighed, scratching at his temple. “You see, manipulating bioelectricity comes so natural to Lunars that it’s virtually impossible to refrain from using it, especially at such a young age. Left to your own devices, you would have drawn too much attention to yourself. It would have been like tattooing ‘Lunar’ across your forehead. And even if you could have learned to control it, the gift is such a fundamental part of our internal makeup that tempering it can create devastating psychological side effects—hallucinations, depression…even madness.” He pressed his fingertips together. Waited. “So you see, putting a lock on your gift protected you, in many ways, from yourself.”
Cinder stared, eyes boring.
“Do you understand how this was mutually beneficial?” continued the doctor. “Linh Garan had his subject, and you were able to fit in with Earthens without losing your mind.”
Cinder slowly leaned forward. “Our?”
“Pardon?”
“Our. You said, the gift is ‘a fundamental part of our internal makeup.’”
The doctor drew himself up, adjusting the lapels of his coat. “Ah. Did I?”
“You’re Lunar.”
He took off his hat and tossed it onto the desk. He looked smaller without it. Older.
“Don’t lie to me.”
“I wasn’t going to, Miss Linh. Only trying to think how to explain in a way that will make you look less accusatory at me.”
Setting her jaw, Cinder hopped out of the chair again and backed away from the desk. She stared at him, hard, as if there really might appear a “Lunar” tattoo on his brow. “How can I believe anything you’ve said? How do I know you’re not brainwashing me right now?”
He shrugged. “If I were to go around glamouring people all day, I would at least make myself seem taller, don’t you think?”
She frowned, ignoring him. She was thinking of the queen on the balcony, how her optobionics had warned her of a lie even when nothing had been said. Somehow, her brain was able to tell the difference between reality and illusion, even when her eyes couldn’t.
Squinting, she jutted a finger at the doctor. “You did use your mind control on me. When we met. You…you brainwashed me. Just like the queen. You made me trust you.”
“Be fair. You were attacking me with a wrench.”
Her anger wavered.
Dr. Erland opened his palms to her. “I assure you, Miss Linh, in the twelve years that I have been on Earth, I have not abused the gift once, and I am paying the price for that decision every day. My mental stability, my psychological health, my very senses are failing me because I refuse to manipulate the thoughts and feelings of those around me. Not all Lunars can be trusted—I know that as well as anyone—but you can trust me.”
Cinder gulped and braced herself on the back of the chair. “Does Kai know?”
“Of course not. No one can know.”
“But you work in the palace. You see Kai all the time. And Emperor Rikan!”
A flash of irritation sparked through Dr. Erland’s blue eyes. “Yes, and why should this upset you?”
“Because you’re Lunar!”
“As are you. Should I consider the prince’s safety threatened because he asked you to the ball?”
“That’s different!”