He knew he’d never be the same. He didn’t want to be. This woman had changed his life in ways he hadn’t known she could, but he wouldn’t ever go back to life without out her. He kissed her over and over. He left his mark on his neck. Her breasts. Little strawberries that stood out on her pale skin, little marks of his possession.
Eli buried his face in her neck, holding her tight, his body over hers, arms, hips, chest and legs aligned as best he could. He lay there for a long moment, feeling her heart pounding against his, knowing he had to move, but something wouldn’t allow him to.
She wrapped her arms around him instead of pushing his heavy body off of her. The tight ball of fear deep inside him, the one always one moment away from threatening to consume him, thawed around the edges. That was his Catarina. She was so accepting of him, of his controlling, dominant ways. He knew he had to ease up a little. He could see the little signs of impending rebellion, but still, she hung in there with him, trying to give him time to come to terms with his fear of losing her.
Her hands glided up his back. Went to his hair. Her fingers threaded the silky strands, then caressed and tugged. There was such a feeling of contentment lying with her, her body melting into his. Her scent wrapping him up and her hands moving over him so gently.
“Honey.” Catarina turned her head so she could press kisses along his temple. “Nothing’s going to happen to me. I’m safe now.”
“You aren’t, you know.” He lifted his head, reluctantly sliding off of her. Immediately he turned on his side and swept her close, pressed her tightly against him, his arm an iron band around her waist. “Cordeau had partners. They only know he disappeared. They could decide you’re a threat to them. Most likely they will.”
“We’ve already decided that we’re going to let Jake and his people deal with them,” she replied softly. “Eli, I’m alive. I’m with you, exactly where I want to be. We have our home, a baby on the way and things are good.”
Eli pushed her long hair from the nape of her neck and kissed her there. He kissed his way over her shoulder to the much smaller puncture scars Cordeau had left behind.
“My leopard needs to run. She needs her mate. And I need to cook you breakfast. That’s important to me, honey. I want to wear your flannel shirts and nothing else. I need to be me again. And you need to be you again. Once our baby is here, there won’t be much kitchen table, on the bar or sink or out on the porch fun. We need to make every minute count.”
He smiled against her shoulder. She had the little sexy voice that managed to set nerve endings on fire without much of an effort.
“I’m buying more flannels.”
“You wouldn’t have to if you’d stop ripping all the buttons off. I definitely have to learn to sew.”
The amusement in her voice warmed him. Still. He sighed. “Kitten, I don’t know how much freedom I can give you right now. I bought a Jeep for you, a four-wheel drive. They’re going to deliver it any day now. I wanted you to feel like you could go anywhere you wanted to go, but honestly, I can’t let you out of my sight.”
He waited. Holding his breath. He hated that he was the needy one. That he knew he should give her everything she wanted, including freedom. She deserved it. She’d more than earned the right to make her every decision. But he couldn’t breathe without her.
Eli knew when it happened, the exact moment when the air had left his lungs and wouldn’t fully return. They’d taken her from him. They’d rushed her through the double doors and he’d felt her heart stop. Felt the breath leave her lungs. Felt her pulse still. It had been there inside of him. He knew she was being taken from him, and his world had changed. Everything had changed.
He buried his face against her shoulder, inhaling the subtle female scent that was unique only to her. God, he loved her. He loved her with everything he was. Every cell in his body. He knew if he kept holding her so close she would eventually fight him. How could she not? Where was his control and discipline now?
“Eli, I’m yours.” She said it so simply it was eloquent. She turned in his arms to face him. Her fingertips traced the lines in his face. “I belong to you, just the way you belong to me. When I need anything, you provide it for me. When you need something, I provide it. That doesn’t mean it’s always going to be easy, but when you love someone, that’s what you do.”
He searched her blue gaze, the bottom dropping out of his stomach. Her features were so delicate. She looked fragile. Vulnerable. But she had steel inside of her. His woman had steel.