“I understand that, Sain”—I was trying to be diplomatic, yet I was not sure it worked—“but you can calm Ryland down quicker than anyone. That will be more important to all of us. Thom can keep Dramin safe because, if this doesn’t work, and Ryland still erupts, I doubt you would be able to save your son then.”
Sain’s face whitened to a shade so pale I was sure he was going to be sick. Then his teeth clenched in what I wasn’t certain was irritation or stomach issues. I waited, every part of me tied in knots as the reality of what we were about to face sunk into me, my magic prickling in both eager anticipation and cold-hearted fear.
I knew as well as everyone in this room that we all might not make it to the cave, as much of a sanctuary that it seemed to be.
Sain nodded in agreement as Ilyan stood, and we didn’t wait. We swept Ryland from the kitchen without another word.
While what we were about to venture into seemed a little bit more of a possibility now, it was anything but a sure thing.
I only hoped the bind was enough to keep Ryland safe.
To keep me from killing him.
Ten
There couldn’t have been a worse time to tell her about my past. Not now as we faced each other in the middle of the courtyard, moments away from running into the forest, into battle. Yet, I wanted to.
I wanted to spill everything as we stood under the jagged edges of the lightning that cut across the sky, pleading with her not to run into that forest, not to die, while knowing neither she nor I had a choice. The battle was here. She would go in one direction with Ilyan, and I would go in the other with the invalids. We couldn’t stop it.
I didn’t want to say goodbye.
I didn’t want to run away from her with this lie in my heart, either.
I was probably being selfish.
She was essentially leaving to sacrifice herself from what I understood. I just wanted to shoot the breeze about kids and love affairs she never knew I’d had.
She smiled sadly as the sky broke open in a roar of thunder, the storm that had plagued us for days only getting worse as the final moments ticked down. Joclyn looked away from me at the sound, and I didn’t wait. I bolted, running away from her and Ilyan into the forest after my disabled party like the coward I was.
I couldn’t look at her anymore.
I had been avoiding her for days because I couldn’t find the strength to talk to her, to spill my guts.
And now it was too late.
The wrong time. The wrong moment.
She needed to focus on what her and Ilyan were about to do.
I hoped I would get another chance.
Thom stood a few hundred yards into the tree line away from the abbey, the tall conifers hiding him and the others on all sides. Dramin had already found a sturdy fallen tree to sit on, and his body looked as aged as it had last night. Being out of bed obviously wasn’t doing him any favors. Sain hovered around him like a nervous mother, and Ryland … Ryland was hitting his head against a tree.
We were already off to a great start.
Thom looked up to me as I approached, my head held high as my fingers buzzed in the tips, ready for the release that I hadn’t been able to give them these last few days.
“Ready to kill some of my cousins?” I said with a smile, glad when Thom laughed at a joke I had made far too many times before.
I chose to ignore the grimace that lined the Draks’ faces. I couldn’t walk on eggshells all the time, and right now, I needed to have my head on straight if they expected me to get them through this. As a result, they would have to deal.
Besides, Ilyan and Joclyn were already waging their own battle in a mad attempt to distract Edmund’s armies enough to let us get out of there. I wasn’t about to waste that.
It only put everyone else in danger.
“You mean other than Edmund’s little puppets?” Thom said as he came right up beside me, his laugh fading much quicker than it normally would have. “I think we have a problem.”
“You mean, besides the fact that we have to travel through piles of armies to get to a cave with three basically useless invalids.” I didn’t even try to keep the mockery out of my voice.
“That and neither of the Draks can shield themselves.”
I looked at him like he had cancelled a Styx concert all on his own. Murder showed through my eyes. I was sure by the way Thom took a step back, his hands plunging into the pockets of his leather jacket.
Great.
“Shielding ourselves was the only thing we had going.” I tried not to yell, but I was not positive it worked.
“Well, we do always have the option to turn ourselves in. I am sure Edmund would love that.” His voice lingered on eruption, the emotion only increasing as thunder rumbled above us once more.
Double great.
An angry Thom, a quickly unraveling Ryland, and some Draks.
I was feeling like this exciting challenge was heading more in the direction of massacre. I didn’t think we would be on the massacring side, either.
Triple great.