Burning Bright (Going Down in Flames #5)

Diving under her, he looped back around and came to fly by her side. “One of these days,” he said, “I’ll outfly you.”

She laughed. “Not likely.” Her wings were tired. “I’m ready for food.” She looped back and forth until she settled on the ground near the dining hall. He followed after her, shifted into human form, and she did the same.

“That was fun,” she said.

“It was.” He smiled at her like they had shared something special and her heart tripped a beat.

“Ready for breakfast?” she asked because she didn’t know what else to say. This was uncharted territory.

“Sure.”

Clint and Ivy landed nearby and shifted. Jaxon spotted them and frowned. It was like someone flipped a switch on his mood and the happiness drained away from his face. “Why don’t you go eat with your friends and I’ll go eat with mine?”

“We could all eat together,” Bryn said. “It’s not like our friends haven’t met.”

“It’s a Clan tradition,” Jaxon said. “We eat together after the first snow. You wouldn’t understand.”

What the hell? “Excuse me?”

“I said—”

Bryn did her best to keep her voice down. “I heard what you said. I just don’t know why you said it.”

“I’m just telling you the truth.”

“No. You’re just being a dick. We were having fun. Why are you deliberately trying to—” she almost said hurt me,but she didn’t want to give him that much emotional power, so she went with, “Why are you trying to piss me off?”

He wore that blank expression she’d seen for most of the summer. “You’re being ridiculous.”

“No. You were enjoying my company. Even if it was just due to the first snow, and now you’re acting all aloof and obnoxious and annoyingly Blue.”

“I am Blue,” he said. “I’m not the one who is acting.”

Flames sparked in her gut. He wanted to point out her mixed heritage? Fine. She’d help him remember. She took a deep breath and shot a ten-inch fireball at his stupid head.

He blasted sleet to keep the fireball from reaching him. “Don’t do that again.”

“Continue acting like a jerk and you’re going to be dodging fireballs for the rest of your life,” she snarled and then stalked toward the dining hall.

Clint and Ivy caught up with her.

“What happened?” Ivy asked.

“I have no freaking clue,” Bryn said. “Can we get carryout and go to your room, because if he says one more word to me, I’m going to lose it and really try to hurt him.”

“Sure,” Ivy said.

They went through the line in the dining hall, loading up a few carryout containers. People were staring and whispering.

Bryn held it together until they reached Ivy’s room and then she sat down and put her head in her hands. “I don’t get it. We were having fun together. You saw him. He asked me to stay and spend time with him. Flying was great. When we landed he was good and then something set him off and totally changed his personality.” She recapped their conversation.

“I’m not crazy, right?” she asked.

“No. It sounds like he was being a jerk on purpose to make you mad,” Ivy said.

“And that comment about him not having to pretend to be Blue,” Clint said. “That’s like textbook passive-aggressive behavior. Even if he didn’t realize it, he was trying to push you away.”

“Why?” Bryn opened her container of food and dug into her French toast sticks. “Since we’re stuck together, why not have fun? A better question is, why turn into a total jackass after we have a good time?”

“Do you think it had something to do with Rhianna?” Ivy asked. “Maybe he felt like he was being disloyal to her memory or something?”

“I don’t know,” Bryn said. “And if that was the case then why not talk to me? Turning into a total ass doesn’t help anything.”

“It’s almost like he’s sabotaging your relationship so you won’t become close,” Clint said.

Bryn took a giant drink of coffee and thought about that statement. “He came to my room. He asked me to fly. He asked me to stay longer. We had fun. And then he freaked out and did something to make me mad so our relationship would continue to be a non-relationship?”

“That about sums it up,” Clint said.

“Okay. Say that’s true,” Bryn said. “Why not just admit to that fact? He could tell me he doesn’t feel right having fun because of Rhianna. I’d get that. If he continues down this route, there’s going to be a funeral rather than a wedding, because I am not putting up with that level of bullshit.”

“And you shouldn’t have to,” Ivy said.

“Here’s my next question. Is he sitting somewhere telling his friends about what he did, or am I totally off his radar like an out-of-sight, out-of-mind thing?”

“I have no answer to that question,” Clint said. “But I am willing to run reconnaissance as a spy. I could go back to the dining hall…pretend that we need more coffee.”

“No. He made his choice to be a jerk. He can live with it.” Bryn sighed. “I hate that I let myself have fun with him…that I let myself believe things might be working out.”

“Things could still work out,” Ivy said. “He has to have some sense of self-preservation, if nothing else. Pissing you off is dangerous. He’ll have to make amends of some sort…right?”

“I don’t know.” Bryn sipped her coffee. “And I can’t change him. The only thing I can change is what I expect from him.” Bryn blinked. “I swear it’s like I’m channeling my grandmother.” And then she had another disturbing thought. “Oh my God. I’m Lillith.”

“What are you talking about?” Ivy asked.

“Ferrin wanted my mother. After she disappeared, Lillith stepped in to take her place. She said it took her awhile to realize that Ferrin could never be emotionally invested in her because she wasn’t the one he’d really wanted. Jaxon wanted Rhianna. I’m stepping in to take Rhianna’s place…Jaxon will never care about me like he cared about Rhianna. So now I’m Lillith.”

“Wow,” Ivy said. “History has a strange way of repeating itself.”

“I know,” Bryn said. “I’m marrying the son of the man my mom rejected and even though I’ll be his wife he’ll never be close to me because he’ll always wish I was Rhianna.” She reached up to rub her temples. “All of this leads me back to the conclusion that my life sucks.”

“Jaxon may be a dick, but he isn’t as bad as Ferrin,” Clint said. “So there is a chance he’ll wise up. Who knows…maybe the key to living with Jaxon, or any Blue, is having low expectations. That way when he does something considerate it will be a nice surprise.”

“Maybe,” Ivy said, “you should go hang around in Sanctuary and see if you can meet a nice hybrid guy.”

“I fantasize about finding someone else, but then I imagine what that would do to my grandmother.”

“Can you sick your grandmother on Jaxon?” Clint asked.

“No.” And that’s when Bryn had a funny idea. “Should I call Lillith and see if she has any advice?”

“While that would be highly entertaining,” Clint said, “I’m not sure you want to run to his mother.”

“And given their stupid level of Clan loyalty, she’d probably be on his side,” Ivy said.

“So what do I do?” Bryn threw her arms up in disgust. “I literally have no idea what my next move should be.”

“Well, I guess you wait and see what he does,” Ivy said.

“My dad mentioned that he forgot how annoying it was to walk on eggshells all the time. I refuse to do that. If Jaxon wants to be pissy, that’s his problem. I’m not going to tiptoe around for the rest of my life.”

“What we need to do is figure out something you can do that will bug the crap out of him,” Clint said.

Not a bad idea.

Ivy snapped her fingers. “I’ve got it. Your hair. Change your hair back to red and blond stripes with the black streaks.”

Would it be worth the backlash from her grandfather? Then again, he wouldn’t have to know. And then it came to her. “I have a better idea. He’s all about pointing out that I’m not a real Blue, right?”

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