chapter 22
“I don’t understand,” I said. “How could this happen?”
We had moved from the center of the room closer to the sanctuary door. We were all sitting on the floor. Josette was propped up against my shoulder. She looked worn, beaten, and tired.
“She used a demon’s blade against another angel,” Thomas said.
“He was going to kill her,” Rebecca replied. “She had every right to defend herself. Is it her fault that the demon’s dagger was the closest means to do so?”
“It does not matter,” Thomas said. “The laws do not make circumstantial exceptions.”
“Maybe they should,” I said, unable to disguise my disgust.
Josette shifted on my arm to look at me. “Landon, do not be concerned.” Her brown eyes were taking time to get used to. They looked so ordinary. She turned her attention to Thomas. “Our Lord knows my heart. He has cast me down as He must, for His rules are not arbitrary, yet He has not cast me to evil. My heart is not filled with hate. Perhaps He may allow me to earn my redemption.”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“True fallen angels are demons,” Thomas said. “They are the angels that have been seduced by evil, and have committed one or more of the seven sins with selfishness in their heart. Josette is not a demon, yet also not an angel. I do not know what she is, for I have never heard of such a thing.”
“No angel has ever killed another without a self-serving motivation,” Josette said.
“In all this time?” I asked. “That seems hard to believe.”
“Why would it be?” Thomas replied. “Angels cannot kill one another with anything but a demon’s blade. An angel using such a weapon is unheard of, unless it is obtained with the intent to harm. Such premeditation is always self-serving.”
“What does it mean to fall?” Rebecca asked.
Josette cast her gaze to the floor. “I can no longer reach Heaven,” she said. “I cannot return there. Maybe one day, but not now. My spirit is broken, cracked. I can feel the loss in my soul, and yet I feel alive. It is a different alive, but it still is.”
“You must be of Purgatory now,” Thomas said. “The place between.”
Josette was silent. Then she stood and walked over to Rebecca. “Cut my wrist,” she said, holding out her arm. Rebecca looked at me. “Do it,” Josette insisted.
Rebecca reached out and ran her fingernail along Josette’s wrist. Her blood began to well up through the cut, a thin stream of it pooling and dripping down onto the floor. No black veins of poison formed around the wound, but it didn’t heal either. Josette looked at it in amazement before Rebecca reached down and tore a piece of cloth off the bottom of Josette’s dress and wrapped it around the cut.
The fallen angel looked at the demon with tears in her eyes, nodded thanks, and approached Thomas, her other wrist held out. He didn’t wait for her to ask. He took his sword and pressed it into her flesh, just enough to cause her to bleed. Again, the blood dripped to the floor and the wound did not heal.
“Mortal,” she said. “I’m mortal.” Her lips didn’t move the second time, but I heard her voice in my mind.
“No,” I said, projecting the words. She snapped her head around to look at me. “Your power has shifted to this world, to Purgatory, to me.” I was trying to be comforting. I failed.
“No,” Josette said aloud, her voice bitter. “I am not like you. I wish to be a seraph. I wish to fight for good, for God. You are kind Landon, but you will do what you must to be what you are. I must also be what I am, regardless of what has happened. I will help you against the demons, against Reyzl. I will not do evil for any purpose.”
“I don’t expect you to, and would never ask it of you,” I replied. “If I can help you be restored, I will.” I turned to Thomas, so serene despite losing his brother to the attack. “What about you? We have a few openings we’re looking to fill.”
“I am sorry diuscrucis, but I cannot. I am the only angel left to guard the sanctuary.”
I looked over to the gigantic door that the demons had been trying to obliterate. It bore the scar of war, a crack that ran from the top corner down towards the center. It was open just enough, but behind it I could see a bright light, the beacon, reaching up through a hole in ceiling. I could also see an altar and pews, as well as racks of swords lined up against the wall.
“What is the sanctuary?” I asked.
“It is a conduit between this world and Heaven,” Josette said. “The light is a beacon which draws us...” She bit her lip. “Draws angels to it, so when they are moving between the planes they do not get lost. An experienced seraph can travel without a conduit, but the novices need the light to find their way. “
“You said Heaven wasn’t up, but the light stretches out into the sky,” I said.
“It’s a side effect,” she replied. “The beam passes from this plane to the next, and reflects upward as a result.”
“Without the sanctuary and others like it, we would not be able to reinforce our numbers,” Thomas said. ”The demon Reyzl was hoping to capture it, to slaughter the angels coming into this world, or to destroy it. Thanks to you, he was unsuccessful.”
“It is also a place of healing,” Josette explained. “The light can purge demon poison more effectively than holy water. The light can also help us... angels regain themselves when they are tempted by evil.”
“You mean Confession?”
Josette nodded. “Yes. After I left you the other morning, I came here. I was conflicted by my dealings with you, and I sought clarity. I had intended to meditate, but when I told Moses about what had happened, he believed that you had tainted my mind. He brought his concerns to the other Elders, and they insisted that I step into the light and Confess. I was compelled to tell them everything.” Her eyes began to tear up again as she recalled the experience. “Things that I had never told anyone, things that I had denied for myself. He used my worst pain against me.” Her tears were flowing again and I was going to comfort her, but Rebecca beat me to it. She took Josette in her arms and held her close.
“Yet they call me the demon,” she said. Josette pulled away and looked up at her.
“You may bear the mark of the Devil,” she said, “But you have embraced the freedom of choice granted to you and used it to forge your own path.”
“Josette,” Thomas said, placing his hand on her shoulder. She turned to face him. “I am sorry for the actions of Brother Moses, he had no right to treat you as he did. He was not the same since the betrayal.”
“Thank you, Thomas,” she replied. “You and your brother are two of the finest fellows I have had the pleasure of knowing. I understand what happened to Moses when Charis betrayed us, but this quest for vengeance has led many astray. I believe that our Lord has a plan for me, and that this is a part of it. I do feel the pain of this loss, and I long to see my home again, but I believe in His wisdom.”
I listened to Josette speak with a new respect for her. I couldn’t imagine what it would be like to dedicate so much of my existence to something only to be discarded for holding fast to the same morals and beliefs that had brought me there. It was amazing to me that she held no ill will towards God for his abandonment. She believed that what He had done was right, and that He held some grand design for all of us. I didn’t get it or believe it, but I respected her unwavering faith. Our work here was done though, and we needed to get back to the city.
“Thomas,” I said. “I don’t suppose you have a car?”