Stef’s false cheer faded. Her posture straightened and her voice deepened, showing real hurt. “What’s going on, Dossam? You’re always off with Ana, caught up in your own private quests no one understands. You left Heart because you said Ana wanted time away, and that’s great, Sam. She’s cute, and I’m glad you’re having a nice time with her. You both deserve happiness.
“But ever since you came back to Heart, you just look more and more stressed. Whatever you did in Purple Rose must not have been very relaxing or fun. We’ve been friends for thousands of years. You don’t have to tell me everything that happened, but don’t pretend I don’t know you’ve been hiding something.”
I wanted to shrink until I vanished between the cobblestones. She meant Menehem’s lab. It weighed on him, what we’d learned, but it seemed like there was something more. Something he hadn’t told me, either.
“Stef—”
She cut him off. “Your friends are worried. The Council—well, you know the Council. They’re looking for a reason to toss Ana—and the other newsoul—out of Heart.”
“They wouldn’t.” Sam shook his head. “They wouldn’t, because we’ve done everything they’ve demanded.”
“They’re waiting for you to make a mistake.” Her voice lost some of its bite. “I just wish you’d let me help. How can we be best friends when you don’t let me into your life?”
Sam bowed his head. “We are best friends. But we’ve had five thousand years.”
“And she’s still working on her nineteenth. I know. So you’ll spend the next seventy years shutting me out. And if she’s reborn, what then? Do I cease to matter?”
“You know that isn’t true—”
“What about the rest of your friends? You hardly visit like you used to.”
“What are you talking about?” Sam raised his voice. “I see people as often as I always have. More, perhaps. But I’ve always needed time alone. You know that.”
“You’re never alone anymore. She’s always with you. And when you go out to see people, it’s for her. Introductions, lessons. Everything you do is about her.” Her anger made the last words fall like punches.
There wasn’t much Sam could say to that, and he seemed to know it. He had devoted a lot of his time to me. The moments he took to think about his response gave Stef another opening.
“You know what they’re saying,” she said, “about Ana and the sylph. About newsouls and the sylph.”
“It’s not true.” He didn’t sound even slightly convincing.
“I was there, Sam. I saw Ana go right for her SED. I saw her when she immediately knew how to distract the sylph long enough for the others to get away. And I saw what happened with the sylph when Deborl and everyone came with the eggs.”
“Surely you don’t believe—”
“What am I supposed to believe? You don’t talk to me about things anymore. People keep asking me questions, because they think I must know what’s going on, but the only things I ever hear are rumors.” Her voice cracked. “I miss you. I miss how things used to be.”
Sam’s shoulders slumped.
This fight would last forever, and I couldn’t stay hidden in the crevice any longer. Every moment made me feel worse, and listening to them…
I couldn’t go out there. Stef had shown all her anguish, and she would be furious if she knew I’d overheard. She’d never hurt me, not like Li would have if I’d witnessed that kind of vulnerability, but I didn’t want her to be angry with me, nonetheless.
Sam couldn’t end this—Stef wouldn’t let him—and I couldn’t stay trapped here between walls that made me itch. Sam would know where I went.
Silver shone in temple light as I lifted the key and pressed the shapes engraved into the metal and squeezed. A gray door swirled into existence.
With one last look at Sam and Stef arguing in the market field, I stepped into the temple.
15
WEEPER
NO SOUND EXISTED inside the temple, not even ringing in my ears, like silence after a loud noise. Temple silence was thicker than regular silence, like stone was thicker than air.
I clutched the door device to my chest, waiting for my eyes to adjust to the everywhere-light that left no shadows. The glow that emanated from the white walls wasn’t actually bright, but the reflections and lack of darkness made my eyes water.
Mysteries surrounded the temple like a cocoon. Everyone knew it was empty, and yet no door existed—not without the key I held. As far as I knew, the only other person who’d been inside the temple was Meuric.
The air pulsed with the temple’s heartbeat, making my skin prickle. Janan was here. “Hello?”
No answer. Just the flattening of my voice in dead air.
Wishing I had the backpack, I tucked the door device into my pocket and tried to decide which way to go. The room was immense, though I didn’t think it was the chamber from the last time I’d found myself in the temple. Neither was it the hall with books, or the room with an upside-down pit where I’d killed Meuric.
Carefully, I strode across the chamber toward an archway, nearly invisible in the strange light. My footfalls made no sound, and not because I was trying for stealth. Sound simply did not carry.