“Can you think of something that might make Crescentia ill enough to miss the banquet for the Prinz tonight, but not too ill to partake in her evening meal?”
She chews on her lip for a moment. “I don’t think there is an ill enough that would make Lady Crescentia miss this banquet.”
Elpis has a point. Tonight will bring Cress one step closer to becoming a prinzessin. She’ll spend the whole night at S?ren’s side and the entire court will be whispering about it. She wouldn’t miss it if she were dying. But…
“What if you put something in her powders that would affect her appearance?” I suggest. “She wouldn’t want to go to the banquet then.”
A small smile works its way to Elpis’s mouth, growing wider. “Ground treska seeds. That would irritate her skin, even cause it to swell if I use enough.”
“Use enough,” I tell her, not wanting to take any chances. And though I’m not proud of it, the idea of Cress’s lovely face red and swollen gives me some satisfaction. “Do you have access to it?”
“Yes, we keep some whole seeds in the pantry to use as a spice. Grinding them up will be easy,” she says, rocking back and forth on the balls of her feet in excitement. “I can do it tonight when she’s preparing for the banquet.”
“Perfect,” I say. “Thank you, Elpis.”
I should leave it at that, but I linger for a moment more, another favor weighing heavy on my tongue. I search for a different way even as I know there isn’t one. I will never have the strength to poison Cress myself. I know that now. But looking at Elpis, seeing the uncomplicated hate she feels for Cress and the Theyn, I know she does. “Would you like to do more?” I ask her.
Elpis’s eyes widen. “Please,” she breathes.
I only let myself hesitate for a second before I draw the Encatrio vial from my pocket. “Then I have another job for you. You’re welcome to say no, Elpis. I won’t be angry. We’ll find another way. One of my Shadows is fetching your mother and brother now, putting them on a ship to safety. You’ll be with them by tonight, I promise, no matter what you choose.”
Elpis listens intently as I outline my plan, nodding along with her mouth twisted and her brow furrowed. Even as I ask it of her, I know it’s too much. She’s a child, and I’m trying to make her a murderer—like me, I think. This is not a job for a child, and I can almost feel Blaise’s disapproval from wherever he’s watching me.
Though, really, I’m not making Elpis anything the Kaiser and the Theyn and even Crescentia haven’t already made her. In a way, the Kalovaxians raised her, too.
So of course, she says yes.
ERIK IS WAITING IN FRONT of my door when I return, one hand on the pommel of the sword sheathed at his hip. He doesn’t look like he’s even taken the time to change since he left his ship—he’s still dressed in rough-spun breeches and a white shirt in need of a good cleaning. Coal is smeared along his cheekbones to direct the sun away from his eyes. I’m a few feet away from him when the smell of sweat and fish hits me so hard it makes me dizzy.
He breaks into a lopsided smile when he sees me, and he pushes off the wall he was leaning against, meeting me halfway down the hall.
“I’m so glad you’re safe, Erik,” I tell him, surprised to find that it’s true. Maybe it’s because he isn’t fully Kalovaxian, and I have a difficult time thinking of him as one of them.
“It takes more than a few pirates to kill me,” he says, shaking his head.
I hesitate. “How is he?”
Erik’s face clouds, and he doesn’t have to ask who I’m referring to. “S?ren’s…as you would expect him to be. Whatever you said in your letter seemed to comfort him, though. He read it at least a dozen times before he burned it. Of course, the Kaiser blames him for the failure of the siege. This was his first major command and it should have been an easy one. But I was there, Thora. There was nothing he could have done. We were ambushed.”
An ambush to stop an ambush. These are not people who deserve my pity.
“I know,” I tell him instead. “It must have been awful. I’m glad you both are safe, though.”
He nods, but his eyes dart around and he lowers his voice to a murmur. “I was hoping we could speak privately. Well…” He breaks off, glancing behind me where I’m sure my Shadows are waiting. “As privately as we can.”
I lower my own voice to match his, even though my heart is thundering. “Is everything all right?”
He pauses, blue eyes flickering around the empty hall. “When we first met, you asked me about berserkers….” He trails off, but raises his dark eyebrows pointedly.
My hand slips on his arm at the sound of the word, but I’m careful to keep my expression nonchalant. Lady Thora doesn’t really care about anything as boring as berserkers, whatever they might be. She only asked him out of mild curiosity. I can’t let him see how desperately I want to know.
“I know the perfect place,” I say.
* * *
—
The garden is empty, as it usually is, and as soon as we’ve taken a lap around the perimeter to ensure no one is listening, Erik drops my arm and turns to me. All pretense of friendliness dissolves immediately. His eyes go cold in a way that reminds me of the Kaiser so much it’s jarring. I unconsciously take a step back.
“Did you tell anyone about Vecturia?” He asks the question quietly, but like he already knows the answer.
The accusation stops my heart and panic seizes me, but I struggle not to show it, to keep my expression surprised and perplexed, but not afraid.
I meet his gaze. “Of course not.” I manage to laugh at the ridiculousness of the question, even as my heart hammers loudly in my chest.
“It was a quiet mission; trade-route pirates were our official story. I was the only one besides S?ren who knew otherwise before we left, and I didn’t tell anyone except you. But Dragonsbane knew, the Vecturians knew.”
I glance up at the windows, counting one, two, three Shadows watching. If the accusations go any further, they can make sure Erik ends up at the bottom of the sea with my former Shadows. No one is around to see, he made sure of it himself. Still, I would rather it not come to that.
“I have no idea, Erik,” I say, keeping my voice level. “I’d all but forgotten you even mentioned Vecturia until now. Besides, I’m watched always, even now—do you think I had any opportunity to waltz out of the palace, find Dragonsbane, and tell him what you had planned? I don’t even know what you had planned. The Kaiser already made me answer for your failure. Are you going to make me answer for it again now?”
For a beat, he looks uncertain, his eyes flitting away before landing on me again.
“Nothing else makes sense, Thora,” he says, but his voice wavers.
“And this does?” I ask him. “That I’m a spy, giving information to pirates? How does that benefit me at all?”
He lifts a shoulder in a defiant shrug, but it’s halfhearted. “Dragonsbane is known to work with Astrean rebels. It’s a way of striking back, a way of weakening our troops, even a way of getting rid of S?ren—”
“I would never,” I say, letting my voice rise to a shout before I hasten to lower it, stepping closer to Erik. “I…” I trail off, making a show of biting my lip and looking troubled. “I love S?ren.”
It’s not the truth, but it isn’t as much of a lie as it should be. I give a mournful sigh and sit down on the stone bench at the garden’s center, letting my shoulders slump forward.
“I’ve been raised here among Kalovaxians,” I continue, making my voice fray like I’m on the verge of tears. “After everything I’ve done, everything I’ve endured, I can’t believe you would still question my loyalty.”
I hear him huff out a breath before sitting down next to me. “I’m sorry,” he says after a minute, and it takes all I have to hide the relief coursing through me.