The sun climbed higher. Its light radiated off the dunes, making her eyes hurt. Her face ached from squinting and her skin grew hot even where it was covered in cloth. She was relieved when the sun finally began to sink, but it did so in front of her, blasting heat into her face and bringing back her earlier headache.
Long before it reached the horizon she began hearing water. She’d start into full awareness at the sound of it, sure that she had finally stumbled upon a stream, but each time it turned out to be her mind serving up memories of what she longed for. She also imagined voices. Whispers made her stop, only to realise a light breeze was stirring the sand now. She hadn’t noticed how taxing the utter silence of the desert had been, with just her own breathing and footsteps to break it. The sound of the breeze receded eventually, but by then she had energy and attention for no more than moving one leg after another.
So when cold and darkness returned it took a while for her to notice. Looking around, she cursed silently. It had been a long time since she had checked whether she was still walking in a straight line, or had remembered to scan her surroundings for signs of humanity. From what she could see, dunes still extended in all directions. The impossible, mad spiral of stars was emerging from the rapidly diminishing glow of the vanished sun. Suddenly dizzy, her legs buckled and her knees met the soft sand.
Angel Valhan, why don’t you hear me? Perhaps because her voice was too quiet in this vast place. Then I must be louder. How, though? She doubted she could speak now, let alone shout. And if he heard, how would he find her in the vast desert?
I need to make a light. She could burn her clothing, but she doubted that would show up against the glow of the stars. Betzi had taught her how to make a small light with magic. Could she do so now? Was using magic permissible in the Angel’s world?
Well, if it isn’t, then it should get his attention.
Closing her eyes, she reached out a little way and drew some magic to herself, feeling a shock as more energy filled her than she had expected. Is this enough? I do need to make a really bright light. She sensed Stain blossom around her as she took more. It shrank rapidly as the magic beyond it flowed in to fill the gap.
What did Betzi say to do? Vibrate the air a little. I’ll start small…
Whiteness assailed her eyes, but not the kind she’d seen when moving between worlds. This light came with a wave of searing heat. It vanished as she stopped making the light, leaving her too dazzled to see the crazy constellation. She lost her balance and fell, landing on her back and sliding down the side of a dune.
Whoops, she thought.
Lying still, she waited until her vision began to recover. Then she concentrated on vibrating the air far above her. Once again the light she made was too brilliant, and she had to cover her eyes with her hands, but at least it didn’t burn her. From her vantage point below it, she could not tell how big or visible it had been from afar, but it was spectacular and perversely enjoyable. Two more times she brightened the sky, then she let go of the rest of the magic she’d gathered.
She waited. Her eyes recovered slowly, but all she could see was the edge of the dunes, the wind blowing sand over one side. She watched the constellation move slowly overhead. Slowly she came to the realisation that the Angel hadn’t seen the lights. She was lost and alone. Her only hope was to find water, and she needed to do that before the sun returned because she doubted she’d survive many more hours under its heat.
The climb to the top of the dune took all her will and left her dizzy. She waited bent over, with hands pressed to her knees, until her head stopped spinning, then checked her position in relation to the stars.
Every step required concentration and will. Every step meant ignoring the ache in her limbs, the dryness of her mouth, the pounding in her head. What thought she could manage was directed to the Angel. See me, she begged. I am here, in your world. Help me. Guide me to water. She lost herself in the words and movements, no longer worrying about the why or when or how of anything.
The first time weakness sent her sprawling down the side of a dune it shocked her into full awareness again, but the next time she had no energy for fear. She stood up and resumed walking because it was what she did now. What she’d always done. What she would always do. She lost count of the times she fell and staggered to her feet. Soon it was a normal part of walking.
When she woke to find warmth spreading up her chilled legs and over her forehead she could only stare up at the sky. It was a glorious blend of purples and reds and oranges. Pretty.
She tried to get up, but her muscles cramped and refused to obey her. Closing her eyes, she sank back to the sand.