Alpha Divided (Alpha Girl Book 3)

I lay back down. “Sure.” Only I wasn’t so sure. Something was up. I was so revved that even my teeth tingled. “Who texted?”


Dastien checked his phone. “Adrian. They found the gris-gris and burned it.” He clicked on my bedside lamp. “How’re you feeling now?”

“I don’t know,” I snapped and instantly felt like a jerk. That question was getting old. “Something woke me up,” I said, changing the subject.

“Probably the gris-gris being destroyed.” He grabbed my chin, and forced me to meet his gaze. “How’re you feeling? Be honest.”

I sighed. He was only trying to help, but I didn’t have a great answer for him. “I feel weird. Unsettled.” I paused. “Should we be doing anything? I feel like we’re just lying here and there’s so much to be doing. We’re wasting time.”

“I think you’ve done enough to help the pack. You’ve sacrificed. I’ve sacrificed. They’re doing the busy work. The prep. Sometimes it’s good to delegate. Trust our friends. They’ll get it done.” He got up.

“Aren’t we delegating?” If so, there was no reason for him to be leaving.

“Yes, but there is something that only you and I can do. Come on.” He held his hand out to me, and I stared at it for a second. “Trust me.”

I met his golden eyes. “I do.” I put my hand in his and let him pull me from the comfort of my bed.

He slung the backpack on, and kept his hand firmly in mine as we made our way to the common room. He let go of me then, but only long enough to stuff a bunch of food and drinks in a bag, before he reclaimed it. “This way.”

I thought about asking where we were going, but I had a pretty good idea.

We walked across campus to the parking lot, and he opened the front door to his car. “In.”

“Are you sure it’s okay to leave campus right now? I just got back and…”

“Yes. We need this. It’ll be okay.”

I raised an eyebrow at him. “If you say so.”

“I say so.” He threw the bag in the back and got in the seat, handing me the backpack. I couldn’t help but peek. I unzipped and looked at the two glowing jars. My energy was still there. I had to keep reminding myself. It hadn’t gone anywhere. Not really.

A year ago, if I could’ve put my visions in a jar and buried them in the backyard, I would’ve done it. I would’ve done anything to get rid of them and be normal. Now I wanted them back so bad I itched to snatch the jars and smash them.

“Ready?” Dastien asked.

“Yeah.”

As he drove, playing soft piano music that soothed my soul, I stared out the window. “Are you mad?” I asked.

“No. Why?”

“Even though you were in the feral cages? Even though I was wrong, and you were right?”

He sighed. “We were both wrong. I was wrong because it was worth trying. We had to give up a lot, but if the witches had been honorable, it would’ve been for the greater good. And you were wrong, too.”

I bit my trembling lip.

“You’re wrong because you’re a good person. You saw the evil there, but you wanted to fix it. You wanted to protect the pack. And that’s the most honorable kind of wrong you could ever be.” He paused. “Wrong is the wrong word.”

I laughed but it sounded a bit desperate, even to me. “Wrong, huh?” He’d used the word a million times.

“It is. It’s not you. This wasn’t your fault. You didn’t ask to get stripped. This is Luciana’s fault. This is Rupert’s fault. All we did was try our best.”

“We failed.”

“Not yet.”

He was right. We still had a chance, but it felt like I’d already failed. I’d gone to the compound and I hadn’t accomplished anything.

As we pulled onto the worst road in the history of roads, I gripped Dastien’s hand tightly. It was good to feel him, to be with him. He calmed me.

Dastien stopped the car as we reached the clearing, and went into the back of the car—pulling out the bag of food and a blanket. While he was busy, I hopped down out and started walking.

He caught up in a second. “Let’s go by the pond.”

“Okay,” I said.

This was the first time I’d been around him since I accepted that he was my mate—since that first vampire attack—that I couldn’t feel what he was feeling. It was both disarming and unsettling. It was like there was a great cavern between us and I couldn’t reach across to him.

I’d thought I missed him before, but being next to him, I missed him even more.

He glanced up at me from where he was putting the blanket. His eyes hadn’t dulled from glowing yellow. I didn’t have to be able to read him to know that this was bothering him, too. He was way more obsessed with our bond than I was.

“Are you okay?” I asked.

“I wish we could break the jars now. I don’t like this distance. You’re here but you’re not, and it’s driving me crazy.”

I sat down heavily. “Me, too.”

He sat next to me and pulled me into his lap, pressing his forehead to mine. “We’ll be okay. It’ll take more than this to take us down.”

“I know.”