Alpha Divided (Alpha Girl Book 3)

You can’t. We’re not supposed to have any contact. I’m here for a reason and I don’t want to fuck it up.

He was quiet for a long time, but I could feel him there with me. His longing and pain. He was sad. Depressed. It made me rethink this whole staying apart. I was here for a reason, but was it really worth the cost?

Dastien wasn’t in the cage anymore, but I barely had to touch the bond to sense he wasn’t doing well. His hunger gnawed at me.

Are you eating? It was my turn to ask the question.

I miss you.

I guessed that was answer enough. Me too.

I took a turn a little too fast, and everyone in the car reached for the oh-shit bar.

Careful, cherie.

I got it. I got it. I just couldn’t help it if I was more than a little anxious to get to Rosa’s. I wanted answers, fast. It was one thing to know that Dastien wasn’t doing well. It was another to feel it. I had to wrap this up before my mate lost it.

Hey. Why don’t you go see what’s in the cafeteria? I’m sure there’s something really good.

I know what you’re doing. I’m okay. I’m heading that way. I just didn’t eat enough while I was in the cages.

But you’re doing okay now?

I’m doing better. I’ll be fine. Just get what you need done, and come back to me.

Okay.

I wanted to be there for him, but I couldn’t be. Instead of turning straight toward St. Ailbe’s like I wanted, I started down the road toward Austin. The car was a little too quiet, so I turned on the music.

“What’s this? Above and Beyond?” Daniel said from the back seat.

I looked in the review mirror. He was smiling, and seemed to actually be enjoying it. “Yeah. How’d you know?”

“I download their podcast every week. Makes for a good Friday, you know?”

“Yeah.” I glanced back at him again before focusing back on the road. “I know exactly what you mean.” I just didn’t expect him to feel the same way I did.

It made me wonder, if things had been different and Dastien didn’t exist, would I have given him a shot? He wasn’t a bad guy. He’d been really nice when explaining all of the magic stuff, and as much as I wanted to hate him, I didn’t. I’d actually had fun with him.

Tessa. Dastien’s warning growl came through the bond.

I couldn’t help but laugh. I was just wondering. But that didn’t happen—you exist. So it’s a moot point. Don’t get upset.

Don’t make me come over there.

Don’t threaten me with a good time.

He laughed and it made me smile. For a second, I felt okay. I could get this all figured out.

I turned up the music and pressed on the accelerator, passing a few cars in the process.

As soon as I got to Rosa’s, I’d have some answers.

This might all work out.

***

I hopped down from the car in front of Rosa’s house. Her flowers were still bright and blooming. Her happy plants made me wish I knew how to garden. Mom had given me an orchid once and I’d killed it dead in days. Needless to say, me and plants were not a good combo.

The door swung open before I reached the porch.

“I didn’t think I’d see you quite so soon, but welcome, mijita. And I see you’ve brought some others.”

“Yes. I hope that’s all right.”

“Of course. Come in. Come in.” She stepped away from the door, motioning us in. “Claudia. It’s been too long.” She embraced her, muttering endearments in Spanish. She did the same with Raphael.

When she turned to Daniel, she paused, grabbing his hands. “I’m glad your mother hasn’t influenced you.”

Daniel sighed. “She is who she is.”

“Yes. And you’re not responsible for that. She’s been going down this road since long before you were born. Don’t take it on yourself.”

Daniel blinked a few times, and nodded.

I turned away, wanting to give him privacy as Rosa pulled him into an embrace.

“Can I get anyone something to drink? Eat?” Rosa said as she closed the door behind us.

The most delicious scent hit me as I walked inside. My stomach growled. Even with all the extra food Mom had brought, I wasn’t eating enough. It was so much easier to eat more when it was just sitting there for me. “Whatever you’re making, I’ll take it.”

“You caught me at a good time. I just finished a batch of tamales.”

Oh my God. Mom never made Grams’ tamales. She said they took too long, but they were my favorite. No one made them like her. Chances were good that Rosa used the same recipe.

I walked into the kitchen. There were three plates filled with the corn-husk-wrapped goodness. I piled a clean plate high and started digging in. As I bit into the second one, I felt a little funny. I looked up from the plate to see everyone chatting in the living room, but it was like I wasn’t there anymore. The only one who saw me was Rosa.

Suddenly the afternoon was flying by. It was like everyone was moving really fast, and I was slow. Barely moving. Like watching a movie on fast-forward. I felt like I was totally out of my own body. I took a step and the world tilted.