touch

Two hours later, I wove my way through the crowded rooms. There’d been no sign of Morik since he left and I was starting to get worried. The partiers were annoying me this time. Too often, I accidentally bumped into someone causing a vision of a future I could care less about. It slowed me down and gave me a headache.

Heading toward the sink for a glass of water, Brad caught my arm and pulled me through the French doors. His hair was messed and his cheeks flushed.

When he closed the door behind us, shutting in the noise of the party he sighed heavily. “You looked like you could use an escape as much as I did.”

They’d cleaned off the deck leaving the chairs free of snow. He collapsed in one and ran his hand through his hair. It explained why it looked so messy.

“Not having fun this time?” I asked looking away to scan the woods behind the house. Was Morik out there watching, waiting for his temper to cool? His bike still stood parked in the driveway.

“Not really. Bea told me what happened and I wanted to catch you to apologize for her.”

I held up my hand to stop him. “It’s okay Brad…”

He stood up walking toward me. He pulled me into his arms and before I had a chance to react, he pressed his lips to mine. I held myself stiffly in shock.

A brief light touch, it ended before it really began, but the vision stayed with me.

I fought to keep all emotion from my face as he pulled back to look at me with a wry grin. “I just wanted you to know that I’d be happy to help.”

He let me go with a smile and held the door open for me. I moved robotically struggling to maintain an air of indifference. Inside, he winked at me before jogging down the stairs again probably to take up post behind the bar before things got rowdy.

Once he was out of sight, I went upstairs to Beatriz’s bedroom stopping for a moment to stare at the door. In bold hot pink marker, she’d created a sign saying her room was completely off-limits to everyone. The word everyone was underlined several times. After having Tommy barf in her bathroom, I didn’t blame her, but I needed I quiet place and didn’t think she would mind.

I slipped into the room shutting the door behind me.

The vision of my future with Brad shook me. He’d be wonderful, of course, but my future relationship with Beatriz truly captured my attention. We’d become very close. I’d confide in her before Brad’s death and we’d do impossible things trying to keep him alive. I’d even confide in Brad. He’d comfort me and tell me he didn’t regret any choices we made as he looked at our two children.

Beatriz would stay by my side through it all. She’d be the best friend I’d ever had and always wanted.

It tempted me so much… and scared me. I’d not only ruin Brad’s life, but hers as well, trapping her with my choices as securely as my family.

There I stood in the dark gathering my courage to take the next step. Light from the hall spilled under the door, but only enough so I could see vague shadows – just enough to think I could see so I’d walk into something and stub a toe. I stayed put.

“Morik,” I called softly my palms sweating. I couldn’t play with lives anymore through my inaction. I needed to try to make the right choice.

“What did you see?” he asked from somewhere in the darkness.

I jumped slightly. His gravelly voice seemed strained. I couldn’t answer his question without hurting him more because I didn’t want to lie. Not to him.

“I need to know…” the ninja kicking butterflies were back, “do you want to be with me just because you’re lonely, or because you truly like being with me?” Silence answered me, so I continued. “I know you’re lonely and that you see me as your last choice, but I know what limited choices feel like, and I don’t want that for you. If there’s someone else… I’ll do everything in my power to help you get the companion you want.”

There. Two small pools of rage glowed from the nearby darkness. Slowly, I moved toward them hoping nothing stood between us.

“And if you do want me as a companion, I need you to tell me what exactly that means.” I stood right in front of him. His eyes focused on me with their unnatural light. “Will I still be able to see my family? What happens if you grow tired of me? What will you do when I grow old and die?” I reached out my hand and gently touched his cheek. His eyes closed briefly and he covered my hand with his own. Lifting my other hand, I set his on his chest. “I don’t know what you want from me,” I whispered.

He bent close, his lips a breath away from my own. “A kiss.”

I leaned forward and closed the gap, my heart pounding. Our lips met and my stomach flipped in an exciting way. A tingle started at the base of my spine, beneath the belt line of my jeans, as soon as I made contact. He tilted his head increasing the pressure. His hands slid into my hair cradling me gently. The tingle grew to an unnatural flare of heat causing me to gasp and pull away in shock.

“What is it?” he asked not letting me move too far away.

“Something was burning…”