I didn't mean it, says Chris. It was a mistake.
It's now way too late for anyone to back out. Not in the literal sense—any one of them could still take off running out the door—but people don't work like that. More or less, they do what others expect them to. If one of the crew backed out now he'd sit around for a month and then either go to a welcome-home party or a memorial service. Either would be horrible in its own way. Half the crew have misgivings about this trip, but they're going anyhow; they've crossed some invisible line, and now even the most desperate premonitions won't save them. Tyne, Pierre, Sullivan, Moran, Murphy, and Shatford are going to the Grand Banks on the Andrea Gail.
Okay, Billy says. Let's go.
Everyone files out the big wooden door. The rain has stopped and there are even a few scraps of clear sky off to the west. Pale, late-summer blue. Chris and Bobby get into her Volvo and Alfred and his girlfriend get into their car and everyone else walks. They cross Rogers Street through the impatient stream of Friday afternoon traffic and then angle down through the gate in the chain-link fence. There are fuel tanks on iron scaffolds behind Rose's, and small boats up with tarps over them, and a battered sign that says "Carter's Boat Yard." One of the fuel tanks has a pair of humpback whales painted on it. Chris drives past the little group, tires crunching on the gravel, and comes to a stop in front of the Andrea Gail. The boat is tied up to a small piece of wharf behind Old Port Seafoods, next to the fire boat and a dockside fuel pump. Bobby looks over at her.
I don't want to do this, he says. I really don't.
Chris is holding onto him in the front seat of her Volvo, with everything she owns in the back. Well don't go then, she says. Well fuck it. Don't go.
I got to go. The money; I got to.
Billy Tyne walks over and leans in the window. You gonna be all right? he asks. Chris nods her head. Bobby is really starting to fight the tears and he looks away so that Billy doesn't see. Okay, Billy says to Chris. We'll see you when we get back. He walks across the dock and jumps down onto the deck of the boat. Then Sully comes over. He's known Bobby most of his life—without Bobby he probably wouldn't even have taken the trip—and he's worried about him now. Worried that somehow Bobby isn't going to make it, that the trip's a huge mistake. Are you two okay? he says. Are you sure?
Yeah, we're okay, says Chris. We just need a minute.
Sully smiles and slaps the car roof and walks away. Bugsy and Murph don't have anyone to linger over and so they waste no time getting on the boat; now it's just the two couples in their cars. Alfred detaches himself from his girlfriend in the front seat and gets out and walks across the dock. His girlfriend looks around, crying, and spots Chris in the Volvo. She draws two fingers down her cheeks—"Yes, I'm sad, too"—and then just sits there, tears running down her cheeks. There's nothing more to wait for now, nothing more to say. Bobby's trying to keep it together because of the other five guys on the boat, but Chris is not trying to keep it together.
Well, I gotta go now, he says.
Yep.
And Christina, you know, I'll always love you.
She smiles at him through her tears. Yeah, I know, she says.
Bobby kisses her and gets out of the car, still holding hands. He closes the door and gives her a final smile and then starts walking across the gravel. As Chris remembers it he doesn't look back, not once, and he keeps his face hidden the entire way.
ALMOST as soon as the New World was discovered, Europeans were fishing it. Twelve years after Columbus, a Frenchman named Jean Denys crossed the Atlantic, worked the Grand Banks off Newfoundland, and returned home with a hold full of cod. Within a few years there were so many Portuguese boats on the Banks that their king felt compelled to impose an import tax in order to protect the fishermen at home. Codfish ran so thick off Newfoundland, it was said, that they slowed ships down in the water.