She throws her hand at me, dismissing me. “Lip, I don’t want to talk about it. It’s done.” She purses her lips and crosses her arms. Her stubbornness pisses me off. I grab her by the elbow, turn her and slam her against the tree trunk.
“You are going to fucking hear me out, damn it. You don’t want to be with me, or have anything to do with me afterward, that’s fine. But goddamnit, you will hear my side.” I rest both of my hands on either side of her head. “I thought it would be easy to walk away when I signed up for the job, but that was hardly the case when the only girl I’ve ever cared about walked away from me.” Her mouth snaps shut and her face goes still. I look her in the eye and know I’d better spit out what I gotta say.
“I was still a kid when I agreed to be your babysitter, I was only nineteen. But when I found you, you were hot and feisty and not at all what I expected. I was immediately attracted to you. Looking at you, and comparing you to me, I knew you wouldn’t want to be with me if you knew who I really was. A monster, insane, a fucking devil. Bull knew it, too. So I became that guy, the one my mother raised and my father hated. The one women dream about and guys despise. It wasn’t a front, it wasn’t a lie—it was me. It was a small piece of me, however. A part I never thought I’d see again.”
She turns her head and clenches her eyes shut, like she doesn’t want to hear anymore. But I’m determined to break through that barrier she’s trying to protect herself with, that barrier she made in promise of never forgiving me.
“When I was thrown in prison, I thought you’d leave, that it would be over. I hoped it would, ‘cause my feelings were blurring with what I was told to feel and what I was really feeling. But you didn’t leave, didn’t walk away even though I wished you had. I had to face you, and lie to you, to someone I was truly falling for. You deserved better than that. You deserve better than me. When I was in prison, you’re right, I did change, because you weren’t there to ground that better side of me. That good guy was buried, and that monster I used to be came out tenfold. I’m more devil than saint, and I led you to believe the opposite, Cherry. When I got out, I couldn’t lock that side of me out anymore, and I sure as hell didn’t want to make you believe I was better than I was. I knew you cared about me, loved me even.” I brush my lips against her cheek. “But I wanted you to love who I really was and not who I was told to be.” I cup the back of her head and bring my lips to her ear. “I want to love you, and have your undying love without the club in my ear, without the fear of you running from your crazy ex. Just us, Cherry. ‘Cause goddamn it, you got in under my skin and I can’t get you out. You’re like a fucking poison. I’ve had a taste, and now I’ll never be right again.”
She slowly turns her head, tears running down her face.
“You really hurt me,” she mutters, her lips trembling with emotion. My chest constricts and I grab her face, bringing it close to mine.
“I know, and I’ll never do it again, Cherry,” I promise.
Her fingers dive into my hair, and her legs clamp around my waist.
“I’m sorry, too, Lip. I wanted to tell you. But I was too afraid of not only losing you, but putting myself and Piper in danger,” she murmurs.
“I know. We both fucked up,” I add, circling the apple of her cheek.
The wind gusts, blowing her hair around her face. I kiss her sugary lips and slip my tongue inside her warm mouth, tasting her. Hands slip under my shirt, and her nails dig into my skin. The pain makes me hiss, but the wolfish look on her face has me lowering my head and smirking at her.
“I know in my head I should give you up, walk away. But my heart wants you, and I can’t for the life of me turn my back on you,” she whispers, a raindrop sliding down her face and finding purchase right on the edge of her upper lip.
“I told you when you met me, I’d damage you for any man left in my wake.”
I grab her by the thighs and push her back against the tree. My hands slip under her wet top, grasping her firm tits. She leans her face in and sucks my earlobe into her warm mouth, and my cock throbs painfully as it strains against my jeans. I turn us and lower her feet to the ground gently.
Grabbing her wet top, I pull it over her head, leaving her in nothing but her white lacybra. She looks so innocent in it, so I leave it. She grabs the hem of my shirt and tears it off my head, her arms shaky, movements rushed. I grab her by the wrist and pull her close to me.
“Don’t rush,” I demand.
She blinks, the raindrops weaving through the vines of the tree, planting themselves on her freckled skin. Her hands fumble with my jeans, and she shoves them down. My dick springs free, and I moan with relief. I undo my boots and kick my jeans off the rest of the way.