‘If I can arrange safe passage.’
‘Perhaps Lord Francis will have found out something useful,’ I said, half-hoping for a reprieve to give Johnny time to change his mind. He sounded as if he could be convinced. Though I sympathised with his principles, it still seemed madness to me for him to turn his back on the life of luxury that was his if he remained and accepted his birthright. I wasn’t sure that I’d stand firm if I was facing such a choice.
‘But what can Lord Francis do?’ asked Johnny. He was obviously inclined to look on the gloomy side of everything tonight.
‘You’d be surprised. Lord Francis knows far more about London than you’d expect, thanks to the peculiar education he has been receiving of late.’
That raised a half-hearted smile. ‘So it would seem, Cat. You’ve led him far astray from the usual path of duke’s sons. I doubt his father would approve if he knew but I think it a very good thing.’ Johnny dug into his breast pocket and took out the money I had given him earlier. ‘Here, take this back. I won’t be needing it. Tell her that I send my heartfelt thanks, but the Ranworth estate is covering the costs of my removal from these shores.’
I took it. ‘Just that?’ The message didn’t live up to my expectations as to what was fitting between two lovers about to say farewell to each other for many years. That certainly wasn’t how it was done on the stage. Clearly, Johnny needed a bit of tutoring in the sweetheart department.
‘What more is there to say?’
‘Shouldn’t you at least ask her to wait for you? Tell her you’ll gaze upon her picture every day at a certain hour so that she can do the same? Send her a token, a lock of hair perhaps, for her to wear in a locket over her heart? Assure her of your unchanging love?’
He shook his head sadly. ‘One of the things you’ll learn as you get older is that we all change, Cat. I wouldn’t ask a girl of sixteen to wait for me: it would not be fair. Who knows what we both might be feeling and thinking in a few years’ time? What kind of home could I offer her?’
He was a hopeless pupil for Cupid. His spirits were too low to rise to the occasion. I couldn’t blame him: he was leaving all the people he loved, setting off to live among strangers, abandoning the old certainties of his life. Added to that, he would be facing the novelty of earning his own keep for the first time. I imagined that, for all his radical, equalising notions, this must be a fairly terrifying prospect for a gentleman raised in privilege. It was one thing to preach, another to practise. Mind you, he had a head start on most of us if only he knew it.
‘You shouldn’t worry too much, Johnny. You’ll get on famously once you make a beginning. You possess an extraordinary talent. I’m sure you’ll be able to offer Lady Elizabeth a good home when you’ve made a name for yourself over there.’ I thought he still stood in need of a little more worldly advice so I lowered my voice. ‘And you know you could always pawn the diamond if things get tight. Mr Sheridan will never know. It could set you up in your own business until you earn enough to redeem it.’
‘That would be more difficult than you suppose.’ He walked over to his desk and got out the two pistols to add to his bundle.
‘Why? If Mr Sheridan wants it back, it’ll take months for the message to reach you in America. You’ll have plenty of time. It wouldn’t be like stealing.’
That made him laugh. ‘No, that’s not what I mean. The diamond isn’t the kind of thing you can pawn.’ He picked up some pens, checking the nibs before slipping them inside his jacket pocket.
‘Why not?’
‘Well, because it’s not exactly a diamond.’
What did he mean? I could tell from the way he was behaving he was concealing something from me. My gaze was drawn to the pen he was examining; it glittered like a jewel in his fingers . . . Then it hit me. I had been a fool. Of course! Johnny was Captain Sparkler. He was the hidden jewel!
‘You’re the diamond, aren’t you, Johnny? There never was a real one, Mr Sheridan was talking about you to Marchmont . . . that was the night you arrived.’ I shook my head in disbelief . . . it had taken me so long to see what appeared so obvious now. It was my imagination that had created the jewel . . . a fantasy that Mr Sheridan had thought useful to continue in order to divert me from the real treasure.
Johnny sat down on the bed beside me and took my hand. ‘I wondered when you would guess, Catkin. There have been many times when I wanted to tell you. I realised that you needed to know the truth when it got you into trouble with the Shepherd gang but it seemed hard to undo the lie once it had got lodged in your head.’
‘I’ve been so blind.’
‘Don’t blame yourself. We encouraged it . . . Sheridan and I. We didn’t know if we could trust you at first. And the price of our lack of trust in you was an injury to your arm and a very frightening night in the Rookeries. At least when I’m gone, you’ll no longer be bothered by my enemies.’
‘But I don’t want you to go, Johnny,’ I blurted out. ‘I’d prefer to spend my life defending you against all those who are after you than never see you again! Stay here. I’ll look after you.’