“I’m not ready for this,” I said, and then pushed back the covers, brushed by him, and spirited out of there.
He didn’t try to stop me. But I could feel his eyes like a brand on my back as I left the room. I was sure he could read every single thought of mine right now—all those confused emotions and unwanted feelings surging through me. Maybe he took comfort in the fact that we both had no clue what to make of this.
Whatever he thought, he didn’t share it.
I had to go back.
I’d run, and that was all great and dandy, but chances were at some point I’d encounter another demon, and I wanted to be wearing more than just a teddy when that happened.
With no little amount of dread, I returned to our bedroom. I shouldn’t have worried. The room was empty, the bed already remade. Wasting no time, I grabbed the first dress I saw—this one with a neckline that plunged past my navel.
C’mon. Leave a little to the imagination.
Okay, so I wasted a bit of time returning that one to the rack, only to pull out a spider silk crop top and skirt that joined together in the front. It still revealed a good deal of skin, but at least these sections were slightly less suggestive.
I donned the outfit and slipped back out, my mind consumed with disturbing thoughts.
I was at war with myself in almost every way possible. I wanted to do good, but I had a growing urge to commit wicked deeds. That didn’t help my already complicated situation with Andre and the devil. My mind and heart knew whom I loved, but my body and soul pulled me towards Pluto.
Three days here, and my will was failing me completely. I needed to get to that quill before it crumbled completely.
Guilt led me out into the fields of flame. The fire didn’t burn me, the heat didn’t sear me. My senses should’ve been exploited by this place, but they weren’t. The souls around me writhed and screamed and my heart wrenched at the sight. Such unending pain.
It only heightened my own guilt. Who was I to deserve to walk the earth when my soul rotted from the inside out? Who was I to deserve love when I could only tarnish it? And who was I to live forever as a queen while all these souls suffered?
Before I was conscious of what I was doing, I began to hum. All those poisonous insecurities of mine began to dissipate as I focused on the melody I created.
Perhaps I imagined the wails dying down just a bit.
The hum formed into notes and distinct words. I barely noticed the glow of my skin as the song poured out of me.
Now it wasn’t my imagination. As I sang, the wails quieted. My heart knew the words to this song, and they fell from my lips. I sang about pain and suffering, and I sang about peace and redemption. I soothed these souls with my voice.
“What are you doing?”
I rotated to find the devil at my back. He looked spitting mad.
I kept singing, but now I reached out to him because I was batshit crazy. His gaze flicked to my hand. Reluctantly he stepped forward and grasped it, though the anger in his eyes didn’t abate. Giving my hand a tug, he pulled me to him, wrapping his other arm around my waist.
The fire around us melted away, replaced by the cold bedroom of the palace. My voice wavered, but I didn’t stop singing. Not until the devil captured my face in his hands and kissed me.
My music cut off.
Fuck. I was right back where I started with the devil.
For a sheer instant, hell was quiet. Then the wails rose up again, even louder than before as they lamented the return of their pain.
Pluto broke off the kiss. “You made them forget.”
I blinked. I could apologize. He would want an apology. But I wasn’t sorry.
Instead, I nodded. “For a time.”
“You made them forget their pain,” the devil said, squeezing my arms. I couldn’t read the expression in his eyes. “It is my job to make them suffer, and you eased them of it.”
I was waiting for his anger to beat down upon me, but seconds ticked by and it didn’t come. His eyes searched mine. Then roughly he let me go and stalked towards the door.
“Asiri.”
His entire body reacted to that name. Twice I’d used it today, and both times it affected him.
“I researched that name.”
He didn’t turn.
“You were once loved by people,” I said.
“That was a long time ago.” His voice sounded shaken.
“But it happened?” I asked.
Now the devil rotated to face me. “Why are you bringing this up, consort?”
My eyes roved over him. “Can you be that man again?”
Slowly he prowled back to me, his movements deliberate. It took all of my willpower not to back up.
“You said it yourself once—I am no man.”
“You’re Asiri.”
He closed his eyes. I was uncovering a bit more of him every time I used that name, and the god that was revealing himself to me was markedly different from the one I was used to.
“I didn’t give you that name to badger me with,” he said.
“No,” I agreed, “but you gave it to me for a specific reason.” Tentatively I touched the side of his face. He grabbed my wrist, but rather than pulling my hand away, he anchored it in place as he leaned in.