The first exercise was what Daniel called “amazingly simple.” Aaron was supposed to list three things about Bonnie that he loved, and how each “thing” made him feel, and then he was to list three things he did not love and how those things made him feel.
The first part had been easy. He loved her smiling laughter, loved the way she adored her children, and the way she worked so hard to make their marriage work. Bonnie had, naturally, beamed like a ray of sunshine as he had listed those things, along with how they made him feel. Happy. Content. Loved.
And then there were the three things he did not love. He listed: her obsession with her looks, harping on him, and snoring. The snoring wasn’t even real—he’d just thrown it in there because he couldn’t think of anything else, and thought it was so innocuous that Bonnie would gloss right over it.
Bonnie did not gloss right over it. Bonnie didn’t gloss over anything, except the obsession with her looks, which was the one thing he thought would make her really mad. But oh no, she and Daniel agreed that it was a woman’s curse in life, which left plenty of room for Bonnie to get mad about the harping and the snoring.
After Daniel had Bonnie reveal and relate (this dude loved making up catchphrases) her feelings about Aaron’s list (and what the hell was the point, again?), it was Bonnie’s turn to list the three things she loved about him: generous spirit (not that he really had one, but he’d take it), his fierce love of his daughters (damn straight), and the way his eyes crinkled when he laughed (actually, he thought the lines were from chemo, but he didn’t have the heart to tell her). The things she did not love about him were: his illness (that was so safe to list that Aaron almost cried foul and accused her of cheating), his moments of self-pity (well, okay, he hated them, too), and the fact that he could not seem to understand her (it wasn’t like he didn’t try!).
And now, here they sat, side by side in his Lincoln town car, stuck in crosstown traffic on the way to Presbyterian Hospital, where he’d undergo his umpteenth round of chemo. Neither of them had said a word since they left the therapist’s office. Aaron was too afraid. Bonnie was too mad.
But as they turned onto Madison Avenue, she sighed, tapped her hand against the window. “I only harped on you about calling Rachel.”
“But even when I called Rachel, it still wasn’t enough for you,” he said, keeping his gaze straight ahead.
“That’s right—because you left her your typical message, that she’d better be doing things your way, or there would be hell to pay. What happened to nice, Aaron? What happened to trying a new approach with her?”
All right, so he hadn’t exactly been eloquent in his message. But he’d been really sick that day.
“I know you were feeling really sick that day, so I can’t help wonder why you’d choose that time to call her. It’s like you wanted to be in the worst possible frame of mind.”
Wow. Preemptive strike. A good preemptive strike. “I don’t know,” he said. “I never feel good anymore, so I’m not sure when a good time would be.”
“Here you go with the self-pity defense,” she said irritably.
“And here you go harping again,” he said. “Wasn’t that the whole point of today’s session? Try not to push each other’s buttons?”
“I’m not harping, Aaron. I am just trying to get you to hear me. If you want to get through to Rachel, try being nice instead of being an ass. And one more thing—I do not snore.”
Aaron leaned his head back against the headrest, closed his eyes, wondered if he even had it in him anymore to be nice or if they’d zapped that along with the cancer cells.
Chapter Nine
Subject: What’s going on?
From: Rebecca Parrish <reparrish720aol.com>
To: Rach <[email protected]>
Hi Rachel. I hadn’t heard from you in a while, and Mom said you and Dad had a fight and you haven’t talked to him since then. Is everything okay? Don’t let him get to you, because he really is just a lamb in sheep’s clothing for the most part.
BTW, I got an e-mail from Robbie, and she said that you said that your relationship with Myron was strictly platonic? Is that TRUE? I didn’t know that! Why didn’t I know that? I demand details! Rebecca
P.S. The herbs you sent for Grayson's allergies worked GREAT. Can you get some more?
Subject: Re: What’s going on?
From: <[email protected]>
To: <[email protected]>
Hey Bec. Glad Gray is doing better, and yes, I can get some more. I’ll check my connection (ha ha). As for Dad, I don’t know what he is other than a real asshole sometimes, but what else is new. Most of the time, we get along. But there are times he can really piss me off.
As for Myron, I did so tell you and Robin that it was “getting” to a platonic state that night we were drinking tequila at the ranch. Why can’t y’all EVER remember anything I say???? I don’t want to talk about it, because there is nothing to talk about. We had a thing. Now we’re friends. End of really very boring story. Gotta run. Say hi to Matt and Gray for me!