“She’s not that bad.”
I rolled over, my mouth dropping open. “You’re kidding me. She flipped out just because I didn’t clean up my room.”
“No, she flipped out because you were ignoring her—you knew it would piss her off. That’s why you did it. You were taking your anger out on her.”
I rolled back over. He was right. I’d been angry at Shauna, and how no one believed that she caused the fight. I couldn’t control any of that, so I did the one thing I could do, which was to make my mom mad. Watching her lose it had made me feel powerful. Still, I wasn’t ready to admit that part of it was my fault.
“You shouldn’t take her side—she hates that we’re dating.” I’d never really put that in words before, but Ryan had obviously sensed it for himself.
“I’m not taking anyone’s side, you shit.” He gave me a nudge. “Just telling it like it is. It would be great if she liked me more, but there’s nothing I can do about it, so why waste the energy.”
Ryan was the kind of guy who never worried about what other people thought of him. He was nice, but he sure as hell wasn’t a people-pleaser. When his friends bummed too many rides, he’d ask for gas money. If they didn’t have any cash, he didn’t give them a ride, simple as that. He’d help friends out, sure, working on their trucks and stuff, but he expected the same in return and if it looked like someone was using him, he stopped hanging out with them.
“It still pisses me off,” I said. “Mom’s been in an even worse mood this week because the neighbors are away and my dad’s going over there every day watering their plants and stuff. She thinks he’s doing too much for them.”
“Are these the neighbors who party all the time?”
“Yeah, they’re always having people over.” We lived outside of town, in a rural area within walking distance from a river. All the houses were newer—my dad had built a lot of them—with big pieces of property. Many of our neighbors had money, their driveways full of cars, boats, RVs. And the Andersons next door threw the biggest neighborhood parties. My parents would walk over with a bottle of wine, then stumble home hours later, laughing and joking with each other. I liked that even though they were really different, they were best friends.
Ryan looked up at the ceiling, like he was thinking. His arms were folded underneath his head, making his biceps flex in his T-shirt. Ryan had an endless supply of concert shirts, this one from Nirvana. But he’d never seen a real band play live. We always talked about going together once we had more money.
I rested my chin on his chest. “What?”
He gave me a lazy smile. “Bet they have lots of booze over there.”
I smiled back. “Probably, yeah.” I added, “My parents are going to my uncle’s for the weekend. But I’m supposed to stick around the house and I can’t have anyone over.”
“Do you know where the key to the house is?”
“Hanging by our back door.” I snapped my fingers. “And they wrote the alarm code down on a list of instructions they gave my dad—it’s on top of the fridge.”
“Want to have some fun Friday?” He grinned. “Both my parents are home, so we can’t come over here, and Dad’s been drinking more lately.”
I’d noticed the fresh bruise on Ryan’s arm. I kissed it now. He grabbed me hard, gave me another kiss. Then he said, “I think we both deserve some fun.”
*
That Friday Nicole took off with the phone, whispering behind her bedroom door. She’d been acting funny since that party and I had a feeling she was seeing that guy, though he never showed up at the house. We were allowed to date at sixteen, so she must be hiding him for a reason. I still suspected he was older but didn’t recognize him from my class. Was he older than me? Maybe graduated? Mom wouldn’t like that. A half hour later I figured Nicole was finished, so I picked up the phone downstairs.
“Hey, I’m using the phone!” Nicole said.
“Sorry. I thought you were done. How much longer you going to be? I have to call Ryan.”
“I’m not sure. We—”
“We’re talking, okay?” A young male voice, kind of jerky. “Why don’t you just wait your turn?”
Shocked, I said, “Who’s this?”
“None of your business. Get your sister off the phone, Nic.”
Now the guy was pissing me off. Why was he calling her Nic? And not telling me his name? What was up with that?
“Listen, you little shit—”
Nicole said, “I’ll call you back,” and hung up.
I ran up to her room and pushed open the door. “What’s the matter with you? Who’s that guy?”
“You had no right to talk to him like that.” She was really upset, near tears. “Now he’s going to be mad at me.”
“Calm down. What’s the big deal? He was being rude to me. I just have to call Ryan and then you can call this dude back.” She still looked upset. “Who is this guy anyway? He sounds like an asshole.”