I started going to regular AA meetings again. J insisted, but I had already decided it would be an important part of my life from now on. I think I had fooled myself into believing I was better than everyone at those meetings; that somehow I didn’t really need to be there.
It was now a month after my relapse and things between J and I were good. I was worried though; there was something bothering him and he wasn’t talking to me about it. We’d had the discussion about his refusal to share club business with me, and he had been sharing more with me since. Even though I sensed he still didn’t tell me a lot, I knew he was trying, and that was all I could ask for. Strong relationships weren’t built quickly; I knew this would take a lot of work, so I was being patient. And yet, I felt it in my gut that something wasn’t quite right with him.
The club still hadn’t found Mandy, so I guessed that he was stressed about that. I’d brushed my concerns away for a few weeks now, but this week he seemed even more preoccupied with whatever it was. He was being elusive, and there also seemed to be some tension between him and Scott.
It all came to a head on the Friday afternoon of that week. I was waiting for J at the clubhouse when Griff wandered into the bar and locked eyes on me. Now, here was a man who I wasn’t quite sure what to make of. He had been a member of Storm for about three years and I still knew nothing about him except that he liked to keep to himself. If I had to choose one word to describe him it would be broody. I took in his appearance. He was tall with dark hair that was a little long, kind of like he just needed a good haircut, but the ruggedness of it did it for me. He also always wore a five o’clock shadow; another great feature as far as I was concerned. I liked a man who wasn’t perfect looking and he definitely fit the bill. Griff was one of the only bikers I knew who wasn’t covered in tattoos; well, tattoos that could be seen anyway. His tanned skin was clear of them on his arms, neck and hands. I had no idea if he had any on his legs as I had never seen them.
His green eyes penetrated mine, and I felt a little disloyal to J with the sensations he evoked in me. His voice was deep and commanding when he spoke, “Scott wants to see you in the office.”
“And why couldn’t Scott come and see me?” I asked.
“In the office now, Madison,” his voice rumbled, and his hand slid around my back to guide me in the direction he wanted me to go.
I wanted to argue with him, but something about Griff told me not to bother. If it was at all possible, he seemed bossier than J, with an air about him that screamed not to challenge him. So, I did what I was told and went to see Scott, with Griff close behind.
Scott was sitting at my father’s desk when we found him, and he looked up with a frustrated look on his face. Putting his pen down he motioned for me to sit. Griff closed the door behind us and stood next to my chair. My senses were going into overdrive; something wasn’t right here.
Scott finally spoke, “Are you up on what J’s been doing this week?”
“I’ve got no idea what J does with his time when he is not with me,” I answered truthfully.
“Fuck,” Scott cursed and shot a look at Griff, who nodded and then exited the room.
Okay, now I was really fucking confused. “What is going on, Scott?”
He sighed and then gave me a hard look, like he was contemplating just how much to share with me. “I was hoping you could tell us because we sure as fuck don’t know what he is doing.”
“Spit the rest out, Scott. What are you hiding from me?”
“Shit, Madison, this is club business,” he snapped, and paused for a moment, rubbing his chin and scowling at me before continuing, “We’re pretty sure he’s still out there looking for Mandy even though we’ve told him to stop. Problem is, it’s bringing heat to the club because that bitch is tied to a gang who don’t much appreciate the way J is going about it. Seems he is harassing their members for information.”
I decided it was time to back my man. “Why isn’t the club interested in finding her and dealing with her? That bitch threatened me.”
“Again, club fucking business, but seems as though I know you won’t let this go... she’s dating one of the head guys of the gang. We take her out, and who fucking knows what will come of it. They don’t mess around, and we don’t need a war. J needs to be smart about this, but I think his head is all messed up with you.”
“So you’re happy to leave me a sitting target.”
“No. We’re watching you when J’s not with you, making sure you’re okay - ”
I cut him off. “This sounds very fucking familiar, Scott. Reminiscent of what happened with Nix. Only this time, I’m not going to lay down and wait for her to come to me,” I ranted at him before storming out of the office.