J was on a mission and I was going with it. I was letting myself feel again. After shutting my feelings down for so long, to now let myself go there was electric. My body was buzzing, my mind was dancing with the possibilities and my desire for J was in fucking overdrive. I needed to have him. Now.
Any doubts I had been having about how he felt had been erased when I saw the raw emotion he experienced when he saw me tied up by Nix. I never thought I’d see the day, but I had been relieved when he’d killed that fucker standing over me. It was no secret that I struggled with the violence surrounding Storm, but my eyes had been opened today and my Mum was right; anything J did was for those he loved. Even what he had done to Rob. I was shitty at myself for taking so long to see this because it had kept me from J all this time. And I didn’t want to be without him for one second longer.
I followed him wordlessly through his house into his bedroom, all the while holding his hand; I wasn’t letting him go.
When we reached his room he turned to me, and pulled me to him. Our eyes locked and I licked my lips, drawing his attention to my mouth. I wrapped my hands around his neck letting my fingers thread through his hair and then pulled his face to mine. The minute our lips met, my core clenched and my brain became a scrambled mess. I needed this man like I had never needed another and I pushed myself closer to him; I couldn’t get close enough.
He groaned, and reached his hands down to my ass and lifted me up so that my legs were wrapped around him. Next minute we were up against the wall, lips smashed together and his hands were under my top searching for my breasts.
“Baby, you feel so good,” he murmured as he rolled my nipple between his fingers.
“Fuck, J,” I moaned, and then kissed him before pulling back away, “Why did we wait so long?” It wasn’t really a question that required answering; more a statement of how much I wanted this right now.
“I don’t fucking know, but don’t think that you can stop me now, cause nothing will fucking stop me now. I’m yours and you’re mine, always have been,” he was staring intently into my eyes while he said all of this.
I nodded and smiled, “Yes,” I said simply, and then a little more aggressively, “Now, fuck me.”
He grinned, and then his lips were back on mine; hard, insistent. Gripping my ass he turned and walked us to the bed, laying me down while he stood and watched me from hooded eyes.
“Take your clothes off, baby,” he commanded and I didn’t hesitate to obey.
I shimmied out of my jeans and then lifted my top off and threw it on the floor, closely followed by my bra. Fuck, watching J watch me was getting me wetter than I already was and I decided to play with him a little. I ran my hands over my tits, pinching my nipples, and then reached one hand down into my knickers and rubbed my clit. My eyes did not leave J, but his eyes roamed my body, first watching me touch my tits and then following my hand into my knickers. He loved to watch, and I loved to be watched; I had forgotten how in sync we were.
“Taste yourself,” he said as he reached down and unbuttoned his jeans.
I watched as he pulled his cock free and stroked it; his eyes remained on my pussy, eager for a show, so I dipped my finger into my wetness and then lifted it to my lips, sucking and licking. He stroked harder and a little faster, which only turned me on more. I moved to a kneeling position in front of him on the bed and pushed his jeans down; I wanted all barriers to J removed. He stepped out of them and then pulled his shirt off. J liked to go commando so he now stood naked in front of me and it was a fucking sight to behold.
I traced the tattoo on his chest, remembering the day he had it done. It was my name tattooed in an anchor and I was surprised and thrilled that he still had it; I would have expected him to tattoo over it after we broke up. His hand cupped my chin and he tilted my face up to look at him while his other hand wrapped around my hand that had been exploring his chest.
“Baby, it’s always been you. Always. Tell me you believe that,” he said, his voice husky.
“Yes, I believe it, J,” I breathed out, full of love and desire. I reached my other hand up to his face and pulled him to me, kissing him deep and hard, before admitting, “And it’s always been you. I thought this was done, but it’s not, and I don’t ever want it to be.” I laid my heart bare before him and prayed he wouldn’t fuck with it again; that he would treasure it and help me to finally put it back together.
“It won’t ever be done. You and me, that’s forever, and this time... this time I will do right by you. I thought I had always put you first, but today, seeing you there, fucking tied up... fuck baby, today I realised that I would do anything for you. I won’t make the mistakes I’ve made in the past.”