“I don’t want a connection.” She sounded like she meant it. Jax didn’t like that sound at all. He didn’t want to not like it, but for the moment, he was going to concede to his curiosity.
He found himself asking, “Who doesn’t want to feel connected?” Yeah. Everybody wanted to feel connected.
“Someone who just went through an ugly, very scandalous divorce no one in this gossipy town can seem to stop talking about. Someone who doesn’t want to add new people to her life so the gossipy people of this town can talk about them, too. Someone who has a son that needs her and can’t afford to add in the stress of a new relationship when the end of the old one is what’s still tearing said son apart, and someone who isn’t interested in being tied down again.”
She put her boys first. He liked that about her. Even if it meant she’d just lumped him into the stressful category. He feigned offended. “Wait. Who said I’d be stressful? I’m pretty low maintenance.” Said the man who had demons beating down his door right at this very moment.
The sudden shift in Em’s demeanor, the way she squared her shoulders like she was preparing for battle, only made him want her more. Her quest for independence looked damn good on her.
Her life balance was just off right now. Maybe. Hopefully. Wait, why did he care?
Em smiled a smug smile. “I’m not sayin’ you’d be stressful per se. I’m sayin’ maintaining a new relationship can be stressful—especially with children. I don’t want that. I don’t want to worry about your happiness, or whether you’re fulfilled enough, or whatever it is that keeps a relationship going. I’m more concerned with mine and the boys.”
Take that, Needy. “What if I don’t feel the same way you do?”
Her blue eyes sparkled up at him—teasing him—owning him. “We’re due for more awkward?”
“So I have to agree to be your sex toy or it’s over? Just like that?” Damn.
Now her eyes went wide as she realized she’d voiced something she wanted and what she wanted, coming from a woman, was generally frowned upon and considered too aggressive, or at least he’d lay bets in Em’s mind it was.
She pushed her finger into his chest. “Yes! That’s exactly what I want.” Then her brows bunched together and her hand went to her throat.
She’d just asked a man to have nothing but sex with her. Right here in Dixie’s house with the children playing in the background, with Caine laughing at something LaDawn had just said, and her libido squarely on her sleeve.
Where was this brash new Em coming from? Not two months ago she’d have torn her own tongue out before saying such a thing. Yet, each time she voiced another desire, it became easier. And crazier.
But just the freedom of it was an aphrodisiac. For a moment or two, she felt like her bones would burst right through her skin if she didn’t say it. The words had just exploded from her mouth like a volcanic eruption.
And then she’d wanted to clamp a hand over her mouth and chew her own tongue off. Or did she? Was that notion something her mother would suggest, or was that how she really felt?
And why was every facet that made up Em all blurred lines and fuzzy outlines these days?
The space between them grew smaller, the heat of Jax’s body pulsed into hers as she watched the wheels of his mind turn. He was choosing his next words carefully. Or maybe he was just choosing to opt out of her emotional roller coaster altogether.
Not that she could blame him, but the idea that Jax might, left her a little empty.
“Daddy?” Maizy was suddenly between them, pushing Em out of the way and demanding Jax’s full attention.
She clung between his thighs, holding her arms upward. Jax turned her around, stooping to his haunches. “Maizy, you’re interrupting a conversation. Please say excuse me.”
Just as Em had suspected, the little girl attached to that angelic voice was adorable, and chubby and perfect, and a redhead. Her mother must have been perfection. A stab of petty jealousy poked her for this woman who’d created this child with Jax.
Speaking of, where was Maizy’s mother? She’d invented all sorts of stories in her head for her whereabouts today while she’d taken extra care picking an outfit then reminding herself it was none of her business where Maizy’s mother was. If you were going to ask a man to have nothing more than illicit sex with you, the rest of his life was off-limits. Those were the rules. She’d read them in a magazine a long time ago when she was still married.
Avoiding personal entanglements began with creating boundaries.
Em smiled down at her, forgetting her out-of-character behavior when Maizy muttered a petulant “Excuse me.”
“Better,” Jax said, smiling his approval, running a large hand over the top of her head with affection. “This is Miss Emmaline. Say hello, huh?”
“Hi,” she murmured, shy, adorable in a fairy princess dress with pink sparkles on the bell-shaped skirt.
“It’s nice to meet you, Maizy. I’m Em. I work with your dad.”