“Oh, God. Where’s Beth? Why am I here instead of my bedroom?” Lily asked, trying to remain calm.
“You had to be sedated, Lily. The doctor felt it was best that someone kept an eye on you. Since Beth works, we agreed this was the best place for you now.”
“Where are my clothes?” Lily asked. “I want to get dressed.”
“Eat first. Your clothes are in the closet and drawers. I’ll show you when you finish.”
Lily picked up an apple slice from the plate, chewing on it. Swallowing the bite, she said, “I need to get back to school after I’m dressed. Would you—”
“Lily, you’re going to be staying here for a while.”
Lily shook her head. “I have to finish school.”
“You will. Beth talked to your school and arranged for a medical emergency so that you can complete your coursework on the computer.”
“But why can’t I go back to school?”
“Lily, someone tried to run you over with a car and then tried to break into your house. We feel it’s safer to keep you where we can watch who you come into contact with.” Shade talked about events he seemed to think she remembered.
“I can stay at my house,” Lily said, trying to take in what he was telling her, becoming frightened that she didn’t remember either incident.
Lily picked up the toast, nibbling on it.
“That won’t work with Beth’s work schedule. We need to figure out who tried to harm you twice.”
“I just can’t stay cooped up in your room.”
“You won’t. You can go back to work at the factory and finish your classes.”
“I don’t want to stay here at the club,” Lily protested.
“A few weeks won’t hurt you, Lily. By then, we may have some idea who is after you, and it will give you some time to figure out why you forgot the last few days.”
Lily looked away, not wanting to admit she didn’t want to remember. “Do you know what caused me to have the episode?”
“Yes. Actually, it was Diamond who figured it out. Do you want to know?”
“No.” Lily got to her feet. “Where are my clothes? I want to get dressed. Do you mind if I use your shower? I could use the one in the other bathroom; it doesn’t look as complicated.”
Shade’s lips twisted at her attempt of humor. “Use mine. I think you can figure it out.”
“All right.” She was relieved he stopped trying to jog her memory.
Shade opened one side of his closet, showing her clothes.
Lily took a step back. “Those are the clothes that I boxed up to give the church. I bought new clothes. I was going to buy some more.” Lily turned her face away but found her jaw caught in his tight grip.
“Those new rags you bought are the ones being donated. They look like what someone would wear to a funeral—all black, brown and grey. Since I’ve known you, you’ve worn dresses with every color under the rainbow. Why have you suddenly stopped wearing color?”
“I don’t know,” Lily said, confused.
“Yes, Lily, you do. There are some things I’ll let you hide from me for a while longer, others I won’t.”
Lily stiffened, trying to turn away from his firm grip.
“Why the dark colors?”
She mutinously refused to answer.
“We’ll stand here all day until you answer me.”
Lily didn’t answer as her hand went to her wrist to snap at the red band. Her searching fingertips couldn’t find it, though, and he wouldn’t let her look at her wrist; his hand was still on her jaw, forcing her to look at him.
“I took it.” At her look of horror, he spoke before she could. “I’ll give it back on two conditions.”
“What are they?” She needed the rubber band.
“You have to tell me about your clothes, and secondly, every time you snap it, you have to tell me why if I’m there. If I’m not, then you have to write it down in a small book I’ll give you. Each and every time.”
Lily thought frantically, trying to think of another substitute she could use, but she was also sure that he would have thought of that.
“All right.” Lily gave in to his demands.
Shade’s hand dropped to his side. Taking a step back, he demanded, “Tell me about the clothes.”
Lily licked her dry mouth, wishing she had the water. “I don’t know how to explain it. When I wore my dresses, the colors made me feel happy. I would choose the color some days because it matched the sky or the sun or was the color of a flower I saw.” Lily shrugged feeling juvenile.
“The new dresses?”
“I don’t know. I just guess… I don’t know. The color is I—”
“Do you feel sad?”
“Yes, but not like depressed sad, like someone died,” Lily tried to explain the deep feeling of loss she had felt the last week or so.
Shade nodded his head, catching her eyes with his. “Who do you feel like you lost, Lily?”
“Beth.” A lone tear slid down her cheek.
“Anyone else?”
“Razer.” Another tear joined the first.
“Who else, Lily?”
Lily remained quiet.
“Who else, Lily?” Shade’s voice became firmer.
“You,” her voice was a whisper.