“Because she’s helping me out with some less fortunate folk.” Sam stared down at Libby, his gaze full of warning not to contradict him. “You know how she is, always willing to help others.” He gave Ryan a pointed look.
Ryan looked a little flustered by that. “Well,” he said uncertainly. He studied Libby a moment. And then, for the first time in months, he smiled at her. He propped his arms on the hood of her car and said, “Listen, Lib. I know this has been really hard for you. I get that, I do. Honest to God,” he said, clamping a hand over his heart. “I wish things hadn’t happened like they did. I’m sorry.”
He said it again! Libby glanced at Sam to see if he’d heard it, too. She wanted to ask him why the sudden change of heart, if he’d told Gwen he was sorry for having left her.
“I mean, you were—you are—really special. I wish things had turned out differently, but, you know, I’m kind of stuck with the consequences now, aren’t I?”
Stuck? What did he mean, stuck? Did he mean he was stuck with Gwen now? Was he really, truly sorry? And what exactly was she supposed to do with that? No—this wouldn’t do. She wanted a grander apology. A marching band, balloons, expensive jewelry! Prove it. Prove you’re sorry.
“So I’m asking you to please ease up for now. I don’t like that we have this restraining order—”
“Me either!” she said with a gush of relief.
“But I need you to ease up.”
“Ease up,” she repeated, looking for clarification, and unthinkingly she started toward him again, but Sam clamped his hand around her wrist and held her where she was.
“All I’m saying is . . . let things settle,” Ryan said. “These little run-ins we keep having are pretty hard on Gwen. And . . . and probably you, too. And me, to be honest. As a personal favor, I’m asking that you let things ride for a while. Will you do that for me?”
A personal favor? As if they were big buddies or something? Libby’s pulse was racing so hard it was fluttering in her ears.
“Let’s just take a step back, let the dust settle. Can you do that for me, Lib? Please?”
What possible answer could she give? No, she would never let the dust settle? She would never ease up? She wanted to punch him, to put her fist right in the middle of his flapping gums. But she said, “I guess.”
His smile went deeper. “Great. Thank you. You don’t know how much I appreciate it.” He straightened up, gave the top of her car a couple of pats before he stepped away. “And, remember to pump the gas once or twice before you try and start the car,” he reminded her, as if the last five months had never happened, as if he were aware of the trouble she’d been having with it. “Thanks, Sam. Again.”
Sam didn’t say anything. He just kept a firm grip on Libby’s wrist.
Libby watched Ryan walk back to his truck, hitching up his Wranglers before he climbed in. He put the truck in gear and drove past her, giving her a wave out of his window before pulling onto the road.
Libby was too stunned to move. I wish things hadn’t happened like they did. I’m sorry. Was he really apologizing for all of it? Of course he was; what else could he mean? You are really special. Did he still love her, is that what he was trying to say? Let’s just take a step back and let the dust settle.
Let the dust settle! Into what? Where could that dust possibly settle?
Libby’s thoughts were racing. Dr. Huber said that Libby’s fantasy of Ryan telling her he’d made a horrible mistake, and that he loved her and wanted her back was only a fantasy, and perhaps an unrealistic one to hope for. That may very well be true, but Libby held on to that fantasy in the most private reaches of her heart. She just wanted Ryan to realize how stupid he’d been, how he’d lost the best thing that had ever happened to him. That was it, some acknowledgment that he was wrong. Beyond that, she only wanted to see the kids.
Ryan had treated her so badly. But she had loved him so, more than anything, and more importantly, she had loved Alice and Max with all her heart.
Could a man like Ryan truly recognize a mistake? Could he ever make it up to her? Could she ever forgive him, at least forget what he’d done, for the sake of Max and Alice? She didn’t know, but she didn’t mind his lame apology one bit. A small smile of vindication began to curve at the corners of her mouth.
She turned around, and collided with the hard wall of Sam. She’d completely forgotten him in the last few moments. She hadn’t even noticed he was still holding her wrist.
He let go of it now, folded his arms, and stared down at her. “You want to tell me what that was all about?”
“Umm . . . no,” she answered honestly. She didn’t think it was a good idea to tell Sam anything about Ryan. But damn it, she couldn’t keep the smile from her face. “No, I don’t believe I do. But thanks for . . . stopping by.” She gave him a friendly pat on the upper arm, stepped around him, and walked into the store.
“Good morning!” she called to the woman behind the counter.