I actually don’t remember anything after cleaning my teeth and lying on the bed in anticipation of what Gabe had planned for me last night
“Yes you did, I left you five minutes thinking you might wanna dress up for me and when I came in the bedroom, you were curled up on my side of the bed, snoring.”
“I was not snoring,” I probably was, I know I snore, badly, especially when I’ve had a drink.
“Yeah that’s what you always say, so this time I filmed you.”
“You did not?”
He reaches to the bedside table for his phone and plays the video back to me; Sure enough, I’m under the doona on his side of the bed, there is only a lamp on so you can just about make me out as I’m so snuggled down. I actually look quite cute.
Suddenly Gabe’s voice cuts into the film, “This is Lauren, the woman I love with all my heart, and some. Look at her, how beautiful does she look?”
Before he can continue, the loudest of snores comes from me, followed by the sound of Gabe laughing, okay, not so cute! I am sitting up in bed now, with my hand over my mouth, partly to shield him from my vomity morning breath but mostly because I am just trying to hide. How embarrassing.
Gabe’s voice continues on the video, “I have begged this woman to marry me,” another loud snore from me, “Because after all, who wouldn’t want to spend the rest of their life, sleeping with this every night?”
I can hear that Gabe is having trouble not laughing as he speaks on the recording and as I look at him sideways, I can see he can barely contain himself now; he wipes the smile from his face as I glare at him.
On the video I let out another massive snore as Gabe sniggers. “Oh and just to add to the attraction and the main reason I love her so much. She farts all night as well.”
The recording ends with the sounds of my snores and Gabe’s drunken laughter. He’s lying back on the bed and laughing next to me now. I get up and go and clean my teeth and rinse my mouth with mouthwash, I splash my face with water and realise that I actually feel okay now. When I turn back to the bedroom, he’s lying on his front, elbows pushed up with his chin on his hands. I raise my eyebrows and look at him. He looks at me sheepishly and my heart melts and I can’t help but smile.
“Are you mad?” He asks.
“Yep. Well and truly pissed off.”
“Sorry.”
“No you’re not.”
“No I know, but I don’t want you to be pissed with me.”
“Well get back into bed and give me a cuddle and I might think about forgiving you.”
We spend the rest of the morning in bed as it takes a lot of loving before I can bring myself to forgive Gabe and he seems more than happy to keep apologising, so I let him.
Later we have an uneventful trip to the supermarket and restock the cupboards and I buy all that I need to make us a full on Sunday roast, I call Jo up and she comes and joins us and the three of us have a perfect Sunday, Jo and Gabe drinking wine and me sticking to water, because I just can’t face a wine.
Around six o’clock as Gabe and Jo are discussing who will win the next election; I hear the gates to the drive slide open, I look across the dining table to where Gabe is oblivious to the sound and ask him, “Are you expecting anyone Gabe? The Gates have just opened.”
He hears the worry in my voice and immediately stands from the table, I hate the sound of those gates, twice now bad things have happened after I have heard that sound, I know it’s irrational and I’m sure it will eventually wear off.
“No baby, not that.”
There is a loud banging on the front door before he can finish talking. I stand from the table too, although I have no idea why.
Gabe gestures his head towards me, “Stay here.”
“Gabe I…”
“Stay here Lauren, stop stressing.”
He kisses my cheek before he heads down the stairs as the door sounds like it’s about to come off its hinges with the persistent banging. I look across at Jo and shrug; she shakes her head at me, “Jesus Lauren, have a glass of wine and calm down will ya.”
I walk to the top of the stairs as I hear Gabe shout “What the fuck? Dude, what are you doing here?”
He’s laughing as he speaks and I instantly relax.
“Man…Since when the fuck did you start locking your door, you got so many women that you have to lock them out nowadays? Shit, smells good in here, you cooking something?”
“Not quite, put your bags down, come up, you staying?”
“Dude, I’m hurt, where the fuck else would I go? I would have let myself in but your key is buried in my bag somewhere.”