Perversion (Perversion Trilogy #1)

“Me, too,” Grim says with a tight nod.

“I’m sorry. Where are my manners,” Bear says with a thick southern drawl as he notices me standing quietly to the side. “I’m Bear. Who might you be, darlin’?”

“She ain’t your darling,” Grim growls.

Bear rakes a tattooed hand through his blonde hair. “No, she ain’t. Mine’s at home about to pop with baby bear number two.”

“How is Thia?” Grim asks.

“Knocked up. Hormonal. Pissed off.” He sighs happily. “And as fucking beautiful as ever.”

Grim’s hard face softens. “This is Tricks.”

“It’s nice to meet you,” I say, offering him a smile. I never thought a beard and a cut could be considered gorgeous, but mix that with a deep and slow southern accent plus a dazzling kind of charm like you wouldn’t believe, and I could see why a normal woman, someone who isn’t me, would be attracted to him. Bear is devastatingly gorgeous.

Whoever Thia is, she’s a lucky woman.

“You too, darlin’,” he says, taking my hand and then pulling me into his hard chest for a quick side-hug. “You take care of this son of a bitch. Someone’s got to.”

“No, it’s not like that,” I begin to say in a panic.

Bear’s phone rings, and he answers, holding his index finger up in the air. “I told you not to do that, Preppy.” He runs his hand through his hair. “Why? Because you’re a fucking idiot, that’s why. Ti’s gonna chop off your head, then come for my balls.” He pauses to listen. “Don’t you Care Bear me. I’ll come slit your motherfucking throat right now,” he holds the phone to his chest. “I gotta take this. It’s…my little sister.”

Bear walks out the front door, and then it’s just me and Grim. All alone in the back of the crowd. Two silent enemies who don’t want to be.

We aren’t alone for long.

I step to the side as person after person comes up to Grim to offer their condolences. I need some air, and it’s probably not a good idea for me to look like I’m clinging to Grim in case Marco has any of his spies here tonight.

I need to get out. I need to think. While Grim is busy with condolences, I slip out the sliding glass doors and walk through the backyard. I don't dare go into Grim's room. I just need to be alone to think, and there's too much of him in there to leave any room for my thoughts. I noticed a footpath that leads into a tangle of woods behind the house. I take the moonlit path. My heart hurts, and I wish I'd gotten to know Belly a lot better than I have. He was so important to Grim. I think he would’ve ended up being important to me as well.

I'm surprised when I see a clearing up ahead, but as I get closer I realize it's not a clearing at all. The footpath has led me right back to the marine stadium under the bridge where Grim and I had kissed.

It’s peaceful. Quiet. Only the occasional wheezing of a small boat engine as it wizzes by. The moon is full and bright, glistening off the dark water. The graffiti on the chairs is less in your face in the shadows. The space seems more tranquil now. I walk down several steps and just stand there looking out in the middle of the bay, hoping that one day soon all this will be over, and there will come a day where I don't have to go back to Marco or to Los Muertos.

“I thought I might find you here,” a familiar voice says from behind me.

I swing my head around to find Grim watching me. He’s wearing his leather jacket with the fabric hood pulled over his head just like that night in the alley.

“I see you don't have any blood on you this time,” I point out.

He smiles, and it shoots straight through my gut. My whole body tingles with anticipation and built-up energy that is going to detonate if not released.

“Yeah, no blood. That’s because tonight, I didn't find my missing cat tangled in plastic behind a dumpster, fighting off a rat three times his size. And what did I get for my heroic rescue and rat assassination? Mr. Fuzzy, the ungrateful fuck, clawed at my chest like I’d foiled his plans of trapping the rat himself.”

“So THAT’S why you were covered in blood that night?” I ask.

“Yeah, that night, anyway.” Grim’s face turns serious. He looks over me to the bay. “But don't get it twisted, Tricks, I am who I am. They don’t call me The Executioner because I kill rats.”

“I know,” I say.

“I think…I think when this is all over, you should get as far away from Lacking as possible and never come back. I’m in charge now. My life is here, but yours doesn’t have to be.”

“No,” I state, crossing my arms over my chest. “I swear Tristan Paine. If you try to push me away again, I’ll kill you myself.”

Grim comes down a few steps, meeting me in the middle of the stadium. “Tricks, I’m trying to do the right thing here. Please let me do the right thing for once in my fucking life.”

“No,” I repeat. “I’m not an idiot. I know who you are, and I know what you do, and I love all of it. All of you. How stubborn you are. How you know me better than anyone else. How you make me feel. How you’ve always made me feel.”

“I'm not that boy anymore,” Grim says.

“You keep saying that! But I'm not talking about the boy from back then. I'm talking about you, as a person. That includes the kid who wrote the letters to the girl who stole from him. That includes the man who has been looking for five years. The one who makes me feel like I matter for the first time in my life.”

“Tricks,” Grim says, but I don’t finish. I can’t. I’m breaking through to him.

“The only man who has my heart. Who’s HAD it for over five years. The only person I have ever loved in my entire life.”

“Tricks, you make doing the right thing really fucking hard right now.”

“I know, and I don’t care. I love you, Grim. I loved you when you were Tristan, and I love you as Grim. There’s nothing you can say to change that. I won’t let you.” My voice cracks.

Grim stalks up to me. He growls and lifts me by the waist. He carries me into the shadows of the dome and pushes me against the wall. My legs wrap around him. His fingers travel up my thighs, into my dress, grabbing handfuls of my ass.

“Say it again,” he demands, his forehead on mine. “Tell me you love me.”

“I love you, Grim.”

His lips meet mine. We’re desperate for one another. Clawing at each other’s clothes, pressing forcefully against one another. It doesn’t matter how close we get. It’s not close enough. It’ll never be close enough.

Grim doesn’t say I love you back. Instead, between kisses, he whispers the same oath from the eulogy he gave for Belly, only different. The words flutter against my lips, and slam into my heart.

“My Life.

My Death.

My Loyalty.

My Honor.

For You.

For Us.

For Always.”

“You’re mine, Tricks,” he says, pulling back to stare into my eyes.

“Always have been.”

He kisses me again. I fumble with his belt. He pushes my hands away to undo it himself. I help him shove his jeans down with my feet. “We don't have a lot of time before people start wondering where we are. I can't be gentle with you.”

I place my hand on his cheek and pull him closer with my legs. “So, don't be.”

I don't want gentle. I just want him. Us. Joined together for always, but if I’ve learned anything, it’s that life is short. And if tonight’s all the universe is going to give us, I’m going to take it.

He rips my panties from my body. I gasp as I feel the soft skin around his hard shaft pressed up against my slick entrance.

I don’t have time to brace myself, mentally or otherwise when he thrusts inside me fully. OH MY FUCKING GOD it hurts. But I don’t tell him to stop. I’d rather feel pain with Grim than pleasure with anyone else. He looks at me, asking a silent question.