And yet his best friend’s wrath would be nothing compared to the self-directed anger and loathing bubbling inside him right now.
A helpless groan slipped out of his mouth. There was no way to ignore the truth—he hadn’t changed at all. Clearly he was still the same screw-up he’d always been. A man who acted on impulse, whose good judgment flew out the window the second he decided he wanted something, and to hell with the consequences.
But there would be consequences to what he’d done tonight. A whole lot of them.
And not the good kind.
Chapter Four
Four days later, Reed strode into Paddy’s Corner Pub in the heart of Southie and reluctantly made his way to the booth where AJ was already seated.
By some miracle, he’d managed to put off this confrontation for days. It helped that Sin was closed on the first three days of the week, which meant not having to see AJ at work, but when his friend had called earlier and cashed in on Reed’s offer to go for drinks, he’d had no choice but to say yes.
The pub was one of his favorites in the city, a total man cave with simple wooden booths, plenty of dartboards and pool tables, and blinking neon beer signs hanging on the walls. And luckily, every patron in the bar tonight was male. Reed had been worried that AJ might want to chat up some girls, but after his explosive encounter with Darcy this weekend, the thought of scoring a hook-up was about as appealing as dyeing his hair pink.
Though if AJ’s drawn features and beach bum attire were any indication, the guy wasn’t in a lady-killer mood tonight, either.
Reed raised a brow at his friend’s threadbare T-shirt and ratty old jeans with an honest-to-God hole in the knee. AJ was usually a sharper dresser than that, and Reed couldn’t stop himself from making a smartass remark. “Jeez. Are you wearing the latest designs from the hobo collection?”
AJ sighed. “Dude, I haven’t done laundry in days. I’m scraping the bottom of the barrel here.”
Keegan, the sole waiter at Paddy’s, approached the booth. He was a former boxer with a full red beard and a crooked nose that had been broken at least a dozen times.
Reed had trained in the same gym as the man, and he greeted Keegan with a big grin, rolling his eyes at the two bottles of Guinness in the man’s hands. “Keeg, how many times do I have to tell you? I’d rather drink sewer water.”
“You’re a disgrace to your people, Miller,” Keegan retorted in his thick Irish brogue. Scowling, he set the bottles in front of the two men. “You don’t get your pansy-ass Bud Lights until you finish your Guinness like good little boys. Hear me?”
Reed and AJ exchanged an amused look as the man ambled back to the bar. “Why do we keep coming back here?” Reed said dryly.
“Because it’s awesome.” AJ picked up his bottle. “Now be a good little boy and drink your Guinness.”
Sighing, Reed forced himself to choke down a sip of the too-thick liquid. “So whatcha been up to?” he asked his friend. “You’ve had the past six days off. Must have been nice.”
AJ shrugged. “I haven’t done much. Just hung around at home. Played video games. What about you?”
I fooled around with your ex-girlfriend.
Reed bit back the words. Blurting it out like that was definitely not the way to do it. For days, he’d been practicing what he would say to AJ, but now that they were face-to-face, the confession got stuck in his throat.
He knew that the second it slipped out, it would be an invitation to get punched in the face. Which he deserved, because he was total pond scum. He deserved every hateful word AJ was going to hurl his way, every accusation, every act of violence. What he’d done was unforgivable, he knew that, and yet at the same time, he wanted to hold on to this friendship for as long as he could.
He didn’t have any siblings, or even parents. Reed’s only family had been his late Uncle Colin, who’d taken him in when he was four years old, after his mother had died in a car accident. His father, sadly, was some faceless man who’d had a one-night-stand with Reed’s mom and took off long before she’d discovered she was pregnant. Reed didn’t even know his name.
Colin had raised Reed best he could, but the man had always been more concerned with getting drunk than nurturing or supporting his nephew. As a result, Reed had learned to seek out that support elsewhere, but he hadn’t truly found it until he’d met AJ.
And now, because he’d given in to temptation, he was about to lose one of the most important people in his life.
“So Gage said you almost caught our dealer,” AJ spoke up, his green eyes serious.
“Almost being the operative word. The asshole was a no-show.” He battled a rush of frustration. “But we’ll figure something else out. I’m pretty sure we haven’t seen the last of that creep.”