I looked up at her. “Wow, Bob was romantic.”
“You’re kidding?”
“No, read it for yourself.” I handed her the note.
As she read, I opened the box and fumbled through the books Bob had left me. There were a few old paperbacks I didn’t recognize and then I got to Possession and The English Patient and A Room with a View. Perhaps it was a whisper.
When Christina was through reading, she folded the paper and handed it back to me. “I didn’t expect that.”
“Right?”
She pulled me along into the building and said, “Come on, let’s thank him and pay our respects.”
We took a familiar path. “Where are we going?” I started to get a very strange feeling.
“It’s just around this corner.” Soon, we were facing the spot where Rose’s placard finally had been placed.
I looked up to the wall. Gleaming two rows above was a placard with the name ROBERT CONNOR and the dates of his birth and recent death. Bob and Rose were on the same wall. Another whisper. It was a coincidence, but it brought back so much emotion. The dream with Rose flashed through my mind, as well as Bob’s words. Those two lonely souls were reaching out to me in death and urging me to open my heart. I put my hand over Rose’s name and then reached up with my other arm and touched Bob’s placard. “Take care of each other,” I said very quietly.
“I’ve got to go, Kate.” Christina had been silent while we stood there facing the wall.
I turned toward her. “Thank you so much for holding on to this. It means a lot that he wanted to share his feelings with me. I only wish I could show him my gratitude now.”
“You can—by taking his advice.” She pointed to the note.
“Yeah.” I smiled sincerely, but taking his advice at this point would open up the wound all over again.
Walking to the L, I held my head up and let the cold wind chafe my face. I needed, more than anything, to make a concerted effort to put things behind me and look forward. If I let myself be open to another relationship, I had to get over Jamie completely. Step one in that process would be addressing the suitcase.
I entered the open door of Jerry’s office at the Chicago Crier. “Hey, kid.” He removed his bifocals and stood up from behind his desk. “What do you say we get sandwiches and hit up Millennium Park?”
“It’s freezing out.”
“All right. Shedd Aquarium, then?” Clearly, Jerry needed a distraction, which wasn’t usually hard for him. Maybe he knew I needed one, too.
“That sounds good.”
“Should we pick up sushi and freak out all the animals?”
“No, that’s terrible.” He was such a kid at heart, albeit a weird one, but a kid through and through. “Let’s get grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup from Ma’s.”
“Comfort food it is.”
I slurped my soup from the bench facing the dolphin aquarium. “Did you know dolphins have sex for pleasure?” Jerry said through a mouth full of grilled cheese.
“Yeah, I’ve heard that.”
“They’re the only animals besides people that do it for pleasure. Do you think they’re capable of love, too?”
I huffed. “Do we have to talk about this?”
“I was just wondering what you thought.”
“Well, I guess you would have to define love for me to answer that question.”
He popped the last of his sandwich into his mouth and looked around contemplatively while he chewed. “Love is a thing that you can’t take out of you. Once it’s there, it doesn’t go away, no matter what. Love can morph into hate and resentment, but it will always be there, buried under the bad feelings.”
“Hmm, very poetic, Jerry, but I think love is just a feeling.”
“That’s lust. That’s why dolphins have sex.”
I choked on my soup. “You’re funny.”
“I’m serious. Love isn’t just a feeling, otherwise it would come and go much easier.”
“I guess what I had with Jamie was lust.”
“Maybe so.” He continued looking forward but elbowed me in the arm. “I guess that’s why it’s been so easy for you both to let go, huh?”
I faced him with a scrutinizing look. “Do you think I’m being unreasonable?”
“Yeah, I do. Not just to Jamie, but to yourself, too.”
“He lied to me.”
“He tried to tell you.”
“How do you know?”
“Well, he’s called me about three hundred times since your little article faux pas.”
“About what?”
“Lots of different things. He wanted me to know that he was sorry for hurting you. He also wanted to make sure that you were okay, since you haven’t returned any of his calls.” I shrugged. “You know, Kate, I find him fascinating. Who would have thought young Ryan Lawson would grow up to be this kind of person? He was such a geeky kid. He’s still brilliant, don’t get me wrong, but he’s really a guy’s guy, you know?”
“Maybe you should date him, Jerry.”