“What is it?” I whispered.
Without hesitation or words he took me forcefully over the edge. Reaching behind my bottom, he yanked my open legs toward his body and sat up on his knees, entering me at the same time. He stayed above me, looking into my eyes as he thrusted into me. Our breaths became louder and louder. I felt a yearning to have his whole body against mine. I tried to pull him down but he resisted. Instead, he brought my foot up to his mouth and kissed it gently, before extending my leg to rest on his shoulder. I was completely open to him and exposed as he took me over and over. Somehow, I felt totally unself-conscious. He held my leg against his chest and anchored his other hand on my hip, reaching his thumb down between us and drawing deep and deliberate circles until I was writhing against him uncontrollably. Arching my back, bringing our bodies a millimeter closer, I gripped the sheets and came hard, without shame.
I felt him tense as my body pulsed around his. He let out an exhausted breath and then collapsed onto me, burying his face in my neck. We were still for several moments while I held his big body, damp with sweat, against mine. He sank down lower, then rolled off of me and onto his side so he could take my nipple into his mouth. He kissed and sucked sleepily until I dozed off. With his head on my chest and my hands tangled in his soft hair, I fell into a heavy, dreamless sleep.
? ? ?
I felt alone before I knew I was. I rolled out of bed and opened the drapes. It was dawn and the light was almost as beautiful as it had been at dusk the evening before. I knew Jamie was gone, but before I turned around for visual confirmation, I stood at the door looking out onto the vineyard. My mind wandered back to the night before. Jamie seemed vulnerable and withdrawn sitting at the edge of the bed, and then suddenly undeterred, hungry for comfort, and a release. I looked around the room at the evidence of our night and wondered how, in such a short time, I could feel so connected to him. Clothes littered the floor, plates from our dessert covered the table, and notes that I had taken and informational pamphlets about the winery were strewn about. I figured Jamie must have gotten up early and gone to work in the vineyard. I took a long, hot bath and waited to hear from him.
At noon, I was starving and bored, so I decided to take my car into town. Driving was still a terrifying experience but it helped to roll down the window and focus on breathing in the clean, warm air. It was a perfect day to walk around the little town. I found my way into a used bookstore, where I discovered a copy of some of da Vinci’s published journals. I bought it for Jamie and then browsed the other stores on the street. It seemed like everywhere I looked, I was reminded of him. Seeing a couple holding hands, or eating in a sidewalk café, I thought of Jamie. On my way back, I visited three other comparable wineries and found that they all lacked the magic I found at R. J. Lawson. Perhaps Jamie was responsible for that as well.
When I got back to the winery, I noticed that his truck wasn’t parked in its usual place.
I headed to my room and found that housekeeping had already cleaned it. There was no record of Jamie and me in bed. It was made with the perfect hotel folds.
A feeling started building in my chest. I looked out the window and searched for Jamie among the many rows of vines. It started to occur to me that he hadn’t called or left a message. His truck was gone and it was getting late. I picked up the phone and called the front desk.
A man’s voice came through the receiver. “Hello, Ms. Corbin. How can I help you?”
“I was wondering if you could connect me to Jamie, uh . . . Jamie, the guy who works here.”
Oh my god, I don’t know his last name. I’m so stupid!
“One moment.” I exhaled, relieved that the phone was ringing.
“This is Susan, how can I help you?”
“Susan, hi, it’s Kate.”
“Hello, Kate.” She sounded weirdly apprehensive.
“I’m looking for Jamie.”
“Oh . . . well, Jamie had to leave.”
“Why?”
“I’m not sure I can . . .” her quiet voice trailed off.
“Can you give me his phone number?”
“Kate, let me get back to you.”
“Get back to me?” I wanted to say, Give me his goddamned number, I just spent the last two nights naked in bed with him. “Never mind.” I hung up and slumped onto the bed and waited for him to call.