‘Now what? What are you going to do?’ I ask.
She puts her hands on her hips and frowns. As I watch, she crouches and gives the trunk a tug; it barely moves an inch. She tugs again. The trunk scrapes along the wooden floor, jolting forward an inch or two. I kneel down beside her.
‘You’re trying to move it? Here, I’ll help.’ Mirroring her movements, I wait until I she pulls it again and do the same. This time, the trunk moves further. Rawlins jerks back, surprised.
‘You know why it moved further?’ I ask. ‘It’s because I helped you. Me. Zoe. The crazy one who’s really in your dream after all.’
She walks round to the opposite side of the trunk and crouches down again.
‘Good idea. You push, I’ll pull.’ I look at her face but she still doesn’t see me. Gritting my teeth in exasperation, I continue to help. We actually manage to shift the damn thing by several metres.
‘It wouldn’t take Freud to work out what’s going on in your life,’ I grunt. ‘You’re burdened by your problems, aren’t you? I’m guessing it’s work. Maybe you have a secret desire to be a film star, too. What I can’t work out,’ I puff as I exert myself to move the trunk, ‘is how on earth I can get you to listen to me.’
The trunk doesn’t slide as far as I expected. I glance at Rawlins and realise that she’s staring right at me.
‘Ms Lydon?’ she whispers.
I almost scream with joy. ‘You can see me?’
Her face is white. I’m about to grasp her shoulder when I feel a sudden involuntary pull across my whole body. ‘No, no, no,’ I mutter in desperation, ‘not now. Please.’
It’s too late though: I’m already being taken away. The black and white room and Rawlins’ shocked expression give way to a cliff edge and a freezing cold wind. I ball up my fists and try not to cry.
‘Help me.’
Where did that come from? I spin round but can’t see anyone. It comes again, a tiny croak, barely audible over the wind. ‘Help me.’
Slowly, I edge over to the cliff and peer down. Dr Pat is hanging over the side, her fingers wrapped round a vine.
‘Hold on! I’ll help you!’ I flop down onto my belly, digging my feet into the soft ground to try and gain some purchase. Dr Pat’s legs are kicking helplessly behind her. I reach over the cliff edge to try and grab her arms. Her eyes are glazed with panic.
‘Come on!’ I yell. Then I stop abruptly. She’s not going to die; as far as she’s concerned, this is only a dream. It’s only a Traveller’s life that would be in danger. I steel myself. I don’t want to do this – but I will.
‘Dr Pat,’ I say as clearly as I can, ‘I will help you if you help me.’
She doesn’t hear me. Her legs flail more wildly and I can see the strain in her biceps. I reach over once more and this time I take hold of her arms. At the very moment I think I’ve got her, her head whips up and her eyes fix on mine.
‘Hi, Dr Pat. I won’t let you fall but you need to do something for me first. You need to tell the police that I couldn’t have done it. I couldn’t have killed anyone because I really am agoraphobic. I’m a bit confused because of the medication I’m on and I’m having strange dreams, but I’m not capable of murder. Do you understand?’
Her pupils are dilated. I have no idea whether anything I’ve said has sunk in. My fingers are starting to lose their grip on her so, rather than try again, I pull her up over the cliff to safety. She rolls onto her back, staring up at the sky. And then I’m being pulled away again.
Strangely, this time I know where I am. The supermarket delivery kid must suffer from recurring dreams because this is the same river, with the same set of bears and the same cute little puppy. I don’t even think about it; I race over and scoop the dog up in my arms and back away. It licks my face. The kid picks up a fish and throws it at the first bear. The puppy whines while I work out what to do. I look from the kid to the bears to the river and I make a decision.
Still gripping the puppy, I rush forward and grab the basket of fish. I dart to my right, keeping as far away from the bears as I can, then leap into the river, gasping at the cold. I plunge across to the opposite bank. The current is surprisingly strong and several times I’m almost carried away. I’m painfully aware of the nearest bear, the one which kept killing the puppy in the previous dreams; its head has swivelled round and it’s definitely eyeballing me.