“That wasn’t the question. Don’t avoid the answer.”
The sigh she expelled was exaggerated and ragged. Cool air blew from her lips in a puff of irritation. “Fiiiine. I’m afraid I’ll get too attached to you because you understand me and my life and my stupid, traitorous dogs. But I’m also afraid to mistake those qualities for something more than what they are and what this is. It would be stupid of me to think that, just because you acknowledge I can see ghosts, you’re the missing half of me. So get the proverbial grip. We’re about as different as two people can be thus far. You shovel the most offensive crap into your body—dead or not. I’d rather die than drink a banana Slurpee. You’re passionate about percentages and the square root of five, and I’m passionate about herbal remedies and ghosts and dogs who have no homes and no one to love them.
“Okay? Yes, it’s damned hard to be rejected and called crazy. Yes, it’s hard to put yourself out there when you know most people think you’re a cracker. My shot at all the things Satan wants to see me trashed over lessens all the time. But my shot for those things isn’t any greater with you because you’re outta here in a couple of weeks. Yes, you get it—you get what goes on in the madness of my communication with the dead—but you don’t know me and I don’t really know you. Letting you in won’t make a difference one way or the other because a few weeks is hardly enough time to know someone.” Right?
“And you like me. Given the chance to spend some time with me, if you weren’t such a chicken, and we had more time, you’d do it.”
And? “But we don’t have more time.”
“Now who’s the logical one?”
When your heart’s at stake, logic can be your BFF. She’d had enough. Hurling the obvious in her face had become tired. “Aren’t we supposed to be eating?” She pushed off on her heel, turning to head down the sidewalk. Her fears were hers—kook that she was. Talking about them with Clyde would only mean she was allowing herself to be exposed. You didn’t do that with someone you’d never see again. There’d be no bonding over her supposed isolation.
He caught up to her, grabbing her hand once more. Against her will, her fingers curled into his. Clyde leaned down and chuckled in her ear. “Avoid, avoid, avoid. And if you’re taking me to one of those places that specialize in goat’s milk and seaweed, you’re dining alone. I’m up for a greasy cheeseburger or some pasta. How about you?”
There went the Souper Salad buffet. “Oh, definitely—color me all in. With a banana Slurpee on the side,” she scoffed, then mentally slapped herself. Clyde should be able to enjoy whatever the hell he wanted. She didn’t know if they had banana Slurpees where she hoped he was headed, or cheeseburgers or whatever, but if they didn’t, she had no right to deny him simple pleasures. “That was catty. Sorry. You should have whatever you want to have, as much of it as you want, before you . . .”
“Go.”
Jesus, he was all about the making his point tonight, wasn’t he? “Right. Go.”
“Something you don’t want me to do. Even if you did call me a liar.”
“I didn’t call you a liar.” Not out loud.
“Well, technically, no. You didn’t. But it’s what you were thinking. I’m still working on not being offended.”
“You do that. And while you’re at it, let’s go stuff your mouth and clog your arteries so you’ll have something to do besides psychoanalyze me and air my dirty laundry in a public forum—”
“Don Henley, 1982—”
She flicked a finger to his biceps. “If you don’t quit that, I’ll take you to my favorite organic restaurant and stuff some marinated burdock root down your throat, followed by some tofu hummus.”
His eyebrow raised in disdain. “Perish the thought.”
Delaney stopped outside of Ishmael’s all-night burger joint, the only one she knew of that was close by. “Aw, look. By-products and animal fat, Clyde. This must be the place.” She went to reach for the door, but Clyde’s big hand stopped her, swinging her around to face him. Her look of question turned to a hitch in her breath. His face was all hard planes, his eyes epitomized somber, and his vibe was once more urgent.