After pacing for nearly an hour I was exhausted, and I sat down against one of the walls.
The contact with the mountain was shocking. The magic was boiling inside the ground. Not actually hot boiling, but it rolled and bubbled as though it were.
I pulled myself away from the contact.
I didn’t like that feeling at all. It was unsettled.
Unsettled was more than I could handle at the moment.
“Kimber!”
I stood up and started running for the entrance to the cavern. I didn’t know who it was—
That thought pulled me up short.
No. I couldn’t blindly run to someone calling my name. Not anymore.
Stopping myself just out of view of the entrance, I pulled myself near the wall and listened.
“Kimber, oh gods and stars, please be okay. Kimber! Are you here?”
I suddenly recognized both the voice and the feel of the person out there.
Master Tymon.
I raced the rest of the way out and right into his arms, screaming his name.
“Oh, thank the Lost God,” he mumbled and gave me a near-crushing hug. “You listened.”
“I ran.” Nodding, I stepped back from him. “Everyone told me to.”
“And you managed to avoid all the foot soldiers who were looking for you. Well done, little one. Come on. Your horse is thirsty. So am I.”
Grabbing his arm, I pulled him to a halt. “What’s happened? What’s going on?”
A deep, tired sigh escaped him. “The residence is destroyed. We’ve lost a dozen dedicants, and…”
“Mistress Danai…”
His shaggy brown hair seemed to tremble in sadness and anger. “Yes. We’ve lost her.”
The urge to vomit welled up and choked me. I swallowed it back and tried not to cry. “Elex?”
“He’s hurt, but nothing our healers can’t handle. He’ll be as right as rain soon enough. Come on, Kimber. We need to get you back. There are people worried about you.”
I jerked awake with the rising of the sun. Today was the end of the mourning period.
Tonight, we would burn my friend.
*
The smoke rose from the pyre, mingling with the dust from the decimated temple.
I did not want to be here.
After all the time I had spent convincing myself I wanted to attend, I didn’t want to be at this funeral. But it was too late.
Elex laced his fingers with mine in the silence that always surrounded the death of a temple master.
I desperately wanted Danai back, even if my reasons were selfish. I was scared. When I was scared before, Danai would reassure me it was fine. Everything would work out. There was no reason to be scared.
Standing in front of her funeral pyre, I was terrified to my very core. Too much had happened in less than a few weeks. Too much was changing.
“You’re trembling,” Elex whispered in my ear.
I nodded. How could I not? This wasn’t what I was expecting out of life.
Someone had attacked the temple.
Someone had killed a master.
A temple was destroyed around my ears, and every single master made me run. The magic pulled me to the cave in the mountain. Despite the shaking and trembling and uncertainty in the very ground we walked on, I knew I would be safe there.
The flames danced around Danai’s body, drawing the ashes up into the air.
The sight was morbid.
The silence was disarming.
The crowds were vast and eerily distant.
S’Kir was in chaos—except for this moment.
Master Dorian stood at the head of the temple members: the masters, the teachers, the dedicants, and the acolytes.
Elex and I stood apart, backed by our friends—Jallina, Jennila, Pierce, Drez, and Arik—we were also not part of the crowds.
I hated this.
A horrid scowl slid into place on Master Dorian’s face. He was clearly disgusted and done. He snapped around on his heel and marched away from the gathering.
The tension in the air released and the crowd slipped away while the temple members did the same.
My feet were rooted in place. It wasn’t even that I didn’t want to move. I couldn’t.
I stared transfixed at the pyre as it slowed its burn. I stayed until Elex finally tugged on my arm and pulled me away.
“Come on, Kimber. We need to leave. They have to—”
“Knock down the pyre and incinerate the remains?”
He shook his head. “I know you’re upset and angry, but this is our tradition.”
Staring at him, I was shocked at his misunderstanding and yanked my hand out of his. “You think I’m angry because of a pyre? I’m angry because that pyre shouldn’t have been. Danai should not have died! Someone killed her! You shouldn’t have been trapped in the wreckage! None of this should have happened!”
“Kimber, please—”
“Do not patronize me, Elex. Do not.”
This time, I spun on my heel and marched away from him, out into the city.
My solitude didn’t last long.
Surprisingly, Elex wasn’t who had broken it. It was Drez. “Kimber, wait!”
I slowed just enough to let him catch up. He took my arm and guided me into the shadows. There was quiet for a moment, and then he spoke.
“Kimber. Acting like this is making you more of a target. You were already on their lists, but being so vocal… Well, you’re going to get your ass killed. I don’t pretend to know what’s going on with the temple, but I do know what’s going on out there.” He pointed to the city beyond the shadows. “It’s damned dangerous.”
“She was murdered.”
Raking his fingers through his hair, Drez was frustrated with me. “I know she was murdered. Look, Kimber. You’ve been delightfully na?ve and sweet our whole lives. I would love to let you stay that way. But I can’t. You’re one of my best friends, and I don’t want to lose you.”
My jaw dropped open. “I’m na?ve?”
A rueful snort escaped him. “Woman, you have no idea. Our world is not a utopia. You’re finding your magic. You’ve got a purpose. And that purpose goes against what other people believe and want for this world.”
“But—”
“No. There are no buts. Not everyone likes our supposed utopia. Watch your ass. Watch your front. Make sure you can trust anyone you confide in. I’m safe. Elex, Jennila, Arik, and Jellina are safe, too.”
He wrapped his hands around my shoulders. “I wish I could spare you. You are a sweet soul, but the magic picked you, and when the magic opens to a person, the black and white you see becomes gray.”
“We are good people.”
“How do we know? How do you know we aren’t the bad guys?” A quirk of his eyebrow punctuated his words. “Be careful. Don’t paint a target on your back. Don’t mourn Mistress Danai’s death in the public eye beyond today.”
Dropping a kiss on my forehead, he gave me a grim smile. “I am sorry. Your sweetness has always been a bright spot. I am going to be sad to see it go.”
Drez was out of the shadows and back to the group in a moment, and all but Elex quickly walked off the temple grounds.
Elex was with me in the shadows a moment later, and took my elbow, leading me away.
“Is what he said true?”
“S’Kir is not the utopia we imagine.”
“You knew all this.”
“Not until recently. Drez…” He cleared his throat and looked around, then continued in a hushed voice. “Drez has been part of the underground group that protects and spies for the temple for years. His parents were too. They believe we are on the right side of history.”
“Who wouldn’t believe in the Lost God?”
Shushing me with a finger to his lips, he started to lead me through the streets back to his apartments.
A glance back at me, and he quietly continued his explanation. “It’s not that they don’t believe in the Lost God. Very few people doubt the veracity of the stories. What they doubt is his benevolence.”
“Why would anyone doubt his benevolence?”
We scurried around another corner, just a few blocks from his front door.
“You, and Jellina, Jennila, Arik, and I all grew up with very few bumps and bruises along the way. Some people aren’t so lucky.”
“My parents were killed in the sea.”