“Sometimes I can’t help but wonder if I did the right thing by saving you.” There was regret in his voice, and I didn’t like hearing it. “It was completely selfish, I know. But in that moment, I couldn’t live with your blood on my hands. I couldn’t live without y–”
He didn’t finish that sentence, though I was pretty sure I knew how it ended. He couldn’t live without me. The feeling was mutual. I couldn’t say a month ago I would have felt the same, but since that night, I knew that my life was nothing without Chase, whether I was ready to admit it to myself or not. I was certainly not ready to voice it aloud, and apparently, neither was he.
It was both a scary and exhilarating revelation.
He took a deep breath, my head rising and falling with his chest. “But I’m not sure if this life I’ve now damned you to is worth the sacrifice. What kind of future have I given you but danger and fear? I don’t want that for you. You deserve better.” His fingers played with the ends of my hair.
I lifted my head and looked down into his silvery eyes ringed in gold. Putting my finger to his lips, I silenced him from anymore guilt and remorse. I wanted to do more than just silence him. I wanted to absolve him of those feelings. “Stop,” I pleaded. “Stop blaming yourself. I won’t have this dark cloud always over our heads.”
“Are you really ordering me to not feel responsible for what happened to you?” he asked astonished, smirking crookedly.
“And if I am?”
He propped his head behind his arms. “Some days I think an angel sent you to me. And then there are days like today…and I am sure that hell is laughing at me. When Death said that it would affect my life, I had never imagined this.”
“Do you want me to pinch you again?”
His laugh sounded like sweet candy to my ears, especially after the night we’d had. I fell asleep in his arms, my head tucked under his chin. I didn’t have a single nightmare, but my dreams were anything but peaceful. They were all of Chase and how he was slowly melting my heart.
***
I awoke in the morning stretched out in my bed. Rolling to my side, still half dazed with sleep, I reached for him. A small smile crept on my lips as I recalled falling asleep in his arms. He had turned a dreadful night into a memorable one and had been nothing but sweet, cuddly, and endearing, exactly what I had needed. And it’s not like we haven’t slept in the same bed before, but this time it meant so much more to me.
So when my hand reached across the bed and found nothing but cool sheets, my disappointment was immense. That sinking feeling settled in my chest, and I squeezed my eyes shut, waiting for it to go away. The thing was...I wasn’t so certain it would just disappear, no matter how much I willed it.
Finally, I gave up, telling myself I was being irrational. It’s not like he left me at the altar. He was just next door, probably still asleep and snoring like a pig. Staring at the empty space beside me, I could still see his face on the pillow. It didn’t help that I could smell him everywhere.
On the sheets.
On me.
His essence lingered.
Memories of our evening together fluttered through my head. If there was one thing I learned from last night, it was that our bond allowed me to break through his demon haze easier. I’d sort of been able to before we were joined at the hip, but not like last night. Just remembering made my heart patter faster. It was convenient and a little empowering. I would totally be lying if I didn’t say it secretly thrilled me.
Dragging my conflicted butt from bed, I could hear movement going on downstairs. I headed into the bathroom, splashed cold water on my face, and threw my hair up into a sloppy bun.
My mom was in the kitchen as she often was on her day off. Bacon sizzled on the stove. “How was the party last night?” she asked, flipping a perfectly golden piece of French toast.
My stomach growled loudly. “Surprisingly terrifying,” I said dryly, taking a seat on one of the breakfast barstools.
She arched a brow. “See, and you thought this town was going to be dull and boring. Good things come in small packages.”
I choked on my OJ. She had no idea how true her words were. Spring Valley was anything but dull and boring, well in the sense that my life was constantly in danger. The people in this town hadn’t the first clue of what really went on in their quaint little hometown. “If you only knew,” I muttered. Luckily my voice was muffled by the searing of bacon grease.
“Did you say something?” Mom asked, peering over her shoulder from the stove.
I just shook my head.
I didn’t see Chase at all on Sunday and spent most of it hanging out with my mom. We cold use some girl time. It was nice to pad around all day in knee-high socks, veg on junk food, and catch up on bad reality TV.
As much fun and relaxation I had on Sunday, I couldn’t shake the fluttering in my heart, like little blips of panic. When that feeling only increased as night drew near, I knew Chase wasn’t home.