Hope(less) (Judgement of the Six #1)

“I’m taking that as a yes. If you turn around while I’m changing I’m going to have you neutered.” He just laughed again, so I hurried into my skirt and switched my t-shirt for the fitted top.

As my head cleared the neckline, I met his eyes in the mirror. Thank the stars I hadn’t changed any underthings. “Hope it was worth it,” I said. “You’re on the couch tonight.”

Rachel and Peter sat on the couch talking when I walked out of my room. “All set, but can we change our plans? I think Clay was freaking out because he knows we’re leaving. He’s been left alone so much this week.” Rachel predictably made soothing noises and went to cuddle Clay, which he tolerated with as much dignity as a man in fur and a collar can muster. “What if we went to that bar with the bistro tables that you were telling me about?”

Rachel leapt at the idea, “That’d be perfect. It’s still nice enough out. Besides, I think this is the last week they do the outdoor dining. We should go before it’s closed for the season.”

But Peter stalled, asking, “Are you sure he will be okay? He looked pretty aggressive in there.”

Rachel stopped petting Clay to look back at Peter, “He’s never done that before. I think Gabby might be right. We’ve been leaving him alone a lot. I even forgot to let him out this morning before I left.”

Peter looked adoringly at Rachel and I knew we’d be going to the bistro bar. “Let me grab my shoes. I’ll follow you guys in my car just in case I need to leave early.”

“I’ll let Clay out.” Rachel got up and walked to the back door calling for Clay to follow.

Clay in turn looked imploringly at me.

After what he just pulled, I had no pity. “You know the drill. Go do dog business.”

He left the room without a backward look. I went to the hall closet to search for my black flip-flops, the best footwear I had to offer the outfit, and grabbed a light jacket for when the sun went down and the temperature dropped.

“You talk to him like he’s a person,” Peter noted.

“I tease her for it all the time,” Rachel remarked, smiling as she walked in from the kitchen to join us. “You should hear her scolding him at night for taking up too much room on the bed.”

Annoyingly, I started to blush. “Well, he’s huge,” I said in my defense, slipping my feet into the plain flip-flops, and made my way into the kitchen to grab my keys. “Most the time I have to sleep curled up. But I’m sure I’ll appreciate him more in winter.”

Clay already sat in the passenger seat when I went out the back door, which meant he’d switched into his skin to open the car door. “You’re going to be seen doing stuff a dog shouldn’t do. That or someone’s going to call the cops because a naked man keeps popping up in my backyard.” He didn’t laugh this time so I looked at him closely while I started the car. “You okay?”

Clay met my eyes and I wished that I could read him better. I couldn’t tell what bothered him now.

As I backed out of the driveway, I laid down the rules. “No growling, no biting, no barking. Pretty much no anything, but acting like a passive well behaved dog.”

Peter drove a red compact. I followed him through traffic with ease as I continued to lecture Clay. “I’m really nervous about this and don’t want to worry about you too.” I sighed and started doubting my decision. Although Clay had witnessed how the guy who sold me the car had acted, he didn’t know how guys acted around me in general. Maybe this wasn’t a good idea. He would flip out when someone started hitting on me.

“Clay, you should know… men make me uncomfortable because of the way they act around me. They usually start flirting or ask me on a date. Most girls would be flattered by it, but if you really pay attention, there’s something unnatural about it. It’s like they can’t help themselves. And sometimes, after I’ve told them ‘No’ enough, they walk away with…” I groped for the right word, but came up blank. He’d remained focused on me as I spoke to him. “I don’t know. A look. Like they’d been caught doing something they were ashamed of. I just want to try for normal tonight, okay? It will be hard enough being in a public place… you’ll see. I just need to know you’re not going to make it any harder on me.”

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him turn to look out the window and reached over to pet him.

Increasingly, I caught myself touching him as if he were a dog. If I didn’t think about him as a guy, petting him comforted me.

“Does it bother you when I pet you?” I asked keeping my eyes on the road. I knew his answer when he contorted his large body to lay down with his head against my leg so I could reach him better. I laughed, feeling lighter than I had in a long while. “Okay. If I start annoying you with it, just move away. I promise I won’t pester you.”