Diarmot stopped before a door, opened it, and insolently waved her and Gay into the room. Ilsa took a few steps inside and stopped, staring at the six little children who called out greetings to their papa. A part of her, the part so well trained in good manners, made her curtsy slightly to each child as Diarmot introduced them.
"Just toss yours in with the rest," Diarmot said and walked away.
As Ilsa heard the door shut behind him, she had the mad thought that it sounded like the coffin lid being nailed shut on every hope and dream she had ever had.
CHAPTER THREE
"M'lady, let me take the bairn. I think ye may be holding him a wee bit too tightly."
Ilsa blinked and looked at the plump, older woman standing before her. The woman was probably in her thirties with the hint of silver in her dark hair, and had a round, pleasant face. There was sympathy in her dark eyes and Ilsa felt that cut through some of the shock which held her so tightly in its grip. A soft whimper from Finlay convinced her to hand her son to the woman. Until she could gain some control of her rampaging emotions, Ilsa knew she could not give her babies the attention they needed. She also knew her upset could make the twins fretful.
"And ye are?" she asked, astonished at how calm and even her voice sounded.
"I fear I didnae heed the introductions verra weel."
"I am nay surprised to hear it. Dinnae ken what the lad was thinking, what foolish game he played. Toss them in with the others, he says. He needs his ears twisted, he does. I am Mistress Fraser, but most call me Fraser or Nurse." The woman curtsied. "My given name is Mary, ye see, and there are a lot of Marys about. Didnae like the way they tried to put a word afore Mary to separate me from the others, so tis just Fraser or Nurse."
"Pleased to meet ye, Fraser." Ilsa touched Gay's shoulder. "This is my companion Gay. She helps me feed and care for the twins." Ilsa noticed only curiosity in the woman's eyes, but Fraser did not press for any explanations, just drew the children closer and began to introduce them one by one.
There was Alice, a pretty little girl of three with thick blond curls and big brown eyes. In a not very quiet aside, Fraser identified the girl as Diarmot's only legitimate child born of his first marriage to a woman named Anabelle. It would have been nice if Diarmot had told her that he had been married before, Ilsa mused as Fraser introduced Ivy, a girl of five with blond hair and blue eyes. Then came Odo, a sturdy little boy of five with brown hair and blue eyes.
A shy little boy of four named Aulay seemed to be all shades of brown, from his thick hair to his big dark brown eyes to his slightly swarthy skin. Ewart, two, was a startlingly beautiful little boy with thick black curls and brilliant blue eyes. Finally, a thin boy named Gregor was introduced. This boy was also two, had dark blond hair, and light gray eyes.
Five bastards, she thought. Some from before his marriage, some bred during his marriage. Diarmot obviously did not honor his vows. Two children aged five and two aged two revealed that Diarmot could not even be faithful to a mistress, let alone his own wife. Her future kept looking darker and darker, she thought with a sigh.
As Fraser introduced Cearnach and Finlay to their new siblings, Ilsa felt numbing shock slowly replaced by a searing hot rage. Telling herself that there were no children of an age to show Diarmot had been unfaithful to her did nothing to cool her anger. He had obviously scattered his seed far and wide and held no faith at all with his first wife. He had never told her that he had been married once. He had never told her that he had a small horde of illegitimate children. Diarmot could not claim he had forgotten those rather important facts, for their time together had been before his injury. In a way he had lied to her, deceived her. She could not help but wonder how deep that deception went, if everything that had passed between them had also been a lie.
And the way he had tossed her into this room, she thought and tightly clenched her fists, had been cruel and insulting. Ilsa was sure the man had meant it to be an insult. Diarmot had also insulted their sons with his parting words. That could not be allowed. If he truly had forgotten her, forgotten their marriage, he had a right to some doubts. There was no doubt, however, that the twins were his sons. She could not allow him to strike out at them no matter how angry or suspicious he felt.
Out of the corner of her eye, she caught sight of a heavy jug. Ilsa picked it up, pleased by its weight and the fact that it was empty. She turned and started out of the room. What she intended to do would solve nothing and she knew it, but she still needed to do it.
"I will return in a few moments," she told Gay.
"Oh, dear," murmured Gay as the door shut behind Ilsa.
"If she needed water, she should have asked me," said Fraser. "There are plenty of ready hands to fetch things."
"She hasnae gone to fetch water."
"Then why did she take the ewer?"