“It’s fine. I’m almost done with him. Have a seat. The doctor will be with you shortly.”
Unsure of what else to do, Ro sat at the desk chair Beau had gestured to. The silence was heavy with unspoken words. Graham felt like a stranger. And dammit, it hurt not being able to go to him and press into his uninjured side and have him hold her close. She’d thought his words that morning were simply his defense mechanism. Like he’d decided if he didn’t give her the chance to reject him, it wouldn’t hurt. If that had been his plan, did he regret it? Especially after Zach had decided to leave? It was too much to expect that Graham would follow his lead and decide to come with them. This was the only real home he’d ever had. How could she expect him give it up for her? She couldn’t. She would never ask him to.
Graham broke the silence first. “So you’re leaving tomorrow.”
It wasn’t a question, but Ro answered anyway.
“Yes.”
She thought that not being able to touch him was painful? This conversation—if you could even call it that—was painful. Where was the heat and passion he’d radiated when he’d stormed into the mess hall? Where was that Graham? The one who had tossed her over his shoulder and carted her around and ignored her protests? Oh wait, that Graham only came out when he cared about someone. Someone he hadn’t ruthlessly shoved out of his life. Bastard. Ro could feel her ire building. She dug her fingernails into the padding of the armrests, but couldn’t stop her words.
“Don’t forget your party hat tonight. I’m sure you’ll be first in line to wish us farewell. Hell, I bet I’ll have to watch the bumper of our truck to make sure the gate doesn’t hit it on our way out.”
Beau finished taping up Graham’s dressing and rolled away from the cot.
“How about I give you two some time—”
“No need,” Ro said, cutting him off and standing. “I think we’ve said all there is to say.”
“Oh, look at that, I need more gauze. Better go find some.” Beau rushed to the door and was gone before she could protest.
“How are you feeling?” Graham asked, his words wooden.
Ro lost the flimsy grip she had on her temper. “Seriously, that’s what you have to say to me? After everything, that’s what you’ve got? Jesus, Graham. You—”
“You’re leaving tomorrow morning … with my best friend. What am I supposed to say? You tell me. Because I don’t have the slightest idea of how I’m supposed to feel right now, let alone what I’m supposed to say.”
“I didn’t ask him to go!”
“Trust me, I know all about it. It was his choice. And he picked you.”
“It’s not always a matter of someone not choosing you. You’re a grown man. You make your own goddamn choices. Clearly, because you chose to cut me loose the second things got hard.”
“It wasn’t like that,” he protested.
“No? Then what was it like?”
“I wasn’t going to let you tear yourself apart over this. I was trying to make it easier for you.”
“Don’t do me any favors.”
“Jesus, Ro. No matter what I do, I can’t do right by you.”
“You didn’t even try.”
Head and heart pounding relentlessly, Ro couldn’t handle another minute of this conversation. She didn’t want it to deteriorate into saying hurtful things she didn’t mean. And she would not let him see her cry. She pushed away from the chair and didn’t look back when she said, “Have a nice life, Graham.”
Graham clenched his fists and fought the urge to explode. The woman was infuriating. She tossed off words without thought, not realizing they ripped through him like the bullet that had creased his side. What was he supposed to do? Turn his back on the home he’d been given and all of the people who counted on him? The fact that Zach had been able to do it still stunned him. It was inconceivable. Impossible. Out of the question.
She hadn’t even asked him to leave with them.
That was the harshest truth to face. His split second decision to spare her emotional turmoil had spiraled out of control, wreaking havoc on his carefully ordered life. She’d leave, and everything would go back to normal. Except Zach would be gone. And Graham was pretty sure he’d have missed out on his one shot at happiness. After all this, he couldn’t figure any way that he deserved a second shot.