First and Only (Callaghan Brothers #2)

Aidan glanced over toward the door, as if expecting to see Ian’s shadow there, listening. If not him, then one of the others. “I don’t think they’ll let you go that easily, sweetheart.”


“I can’t stay, Aidan. I just can’t.” Tears began to well up in her eyes. Who had she been kidding, anyway? Before, only Kieran knew about her secret, and look how he’d treated her. Now everyone knew. She couldn’t bear the way they would look at her from here on out. Or the way they would baby her, protect her like some fragile piece of china. It made her want to scream.

That was one of the many wonderful things about Aidan. He never tried to stop her from doing anything, but he was always there to pick up the pieces when she did something monumentally stupid. Like coming back to Pine Ridge. That had to be the granddaddy of them all.

Aidan was skeptical. “You’re sure about that? It’s what you want?”

“Yes,” she sniffed. “I’m sure.”

“What about Ian? He hasn’t left your side for days, Lex. He’s the one, isn’t he? The one who’s held your heart for all these years?”

Lexi was quiet for several long seconds. God, was it that obvious? Yes, she supposed it was. She’d been like a lovesick puppy around him, always had been. The only one who hadn’t seen it apparently was Ian, though she suspected even he was finally catching on.

“No,” she said finally.

“Alexis,” Aidan scolded gently.

She looked at her hands, folded neatly across her stomach. “I - I thought he was, but I was wrong.” The words tasted like bile in her mouth; her stomach ached at the wrongness of them. God would punish her for such a bald-faced lie. But surely He would understand.

“There is nothing here for me, Aidan. Please. Take me home.”

“I’ll talk to the Doctor, okay?” he said placatingly. “We’ll see what he says.”

Lexi shook her head. It wasn’t good enough, and it would waste far too much time. And Aidan was right – the Callaghans would never let her go so easily. She pushed herself into a sitting position, pausing to wait for the room to stop spinning. Aidan was there, like always, steadying her.

“No. Get the plane ready, Aidan. Call Dr. Fahs and tell him we’re on our way – he knows the drill. I’m signing myself out.”

“Lex, I’m not convinced this is the right thing to –“

“Fine,” she said, mustering as much power as she could behind the words. Physically, she was beat, but the fire burned inside her, giving her strength. “I’ll do it myself.”

Gritting her teeth, she managed to swing her legs over the side of the bed.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Michael asked as he entered the room.

“I’m leaving,” Lexi said firmly.

“I don’t think so,” Michael answered, swinging her legs back onto the bed as if she was a small child. “Why would you even –“

“Michael,” Lexi interrupted softly. “Michael, look at me.” Lexi waited until Michael’s eyes were focused on hers. “You examined me. You know why I need to go. Don’t you?”

Michael stared into her eyes for a long time before answering. Lexi endured his probing gaze, willing him to understand. “Alright,” he said finally. “But I do so against my better judgment.”

“Thank you, Michael.”

Michael looked at Aidan. “Can you put me in touch with her regular doc?”

Aidan nodded, pulling out a small mobile device.

––––––––

“Going somewhere?” Ian entered the hospital room sometime later. Clearly Michael had given him a heads-up. Lexi would have expected no less. She needed to say her goodbye, no matter how painful it would be.

“Yeah,” Lexi said, attempting a weak smile and failing miserably. “Home.”

She was already dressed. The loose, lightweight cotton blouse had long sleeves; the matching skirt went down to her ankles. The outfit concealed the bruises that still marked her, though they were fading quickly as her body started to take care of itself again.

Ian shoved his hands down into his jeans. “Mick’s okay with this?”

“He doesn’t have a choice. It’s my decision.”

“This is what you want?”

No. And why did everyone keep asking her that? “Yes.” Again, Lexi half-expected a lightning bolt to strike her right there in her hospital bed for telling such a huge lie.

“And where do I fit into all this, Lex?”

You are the epitome of everything I want and can’t have. The words burned a hole in her chest, right over her heart, but it was the truth. For a while she’d had a chance to live her dream, but that’s all it could ever be. There was no way she could keep up the pace she had this last week; it would kill her. Almost had.