She sighed. “It is not that simple, Bhikhu.”
“Why not? Explain the complexity to me. It will be a long while until dawn yet. Tell me.”
“I do not wish to wake the others.” She turned and glanced toward where he was sleeping, but Annon shut his eyes and held still, listening to their banter.
“You don’t want to discuss it because you know I’m right,” he answered.
“You are arrogant.”
“You are evasive. Explain this to me then. What will happen to you if you forsake the Romani and someone snaps that ridiculous earring off you? Hmm? What will they do to you?”
Annon opened his eyes and watched her lean her face against her arms, crossed over her knees.
“I don’t know.”
“What were you taught?”
“Nothing. Only that the punishment would be extreme. It was never something specific. Not like receiving lashes with a switch or punishment like that. Punished in other ways. It was always…vague.”
Paedrin breathed out like a hiss. “And you were a child when you were told this?”
“Yes.”
Paedrin let out a pent-up breath, a seething sound. “Truthfully?” It was quiet for a long moment. “There is no pain so awful as that of suspense. It is the cause of even the wise man’s fear. Not knowing what will happen. It is more effective than any threat at binding someone’s mind.” He exhaled again, shaking his head. “To be so cursed as a child. You were bound with strong ropes indeed.”
“I was taught the only way to freedom was to buy mine.”
“Indeed. They bound you with cruel, vague threats and said the only key was coin. Do you understand me, Hettie? The key is in your mind. You need but turn the lock and free yourself.”
“But if I am caught by a Romani…”
He made a dismissive gesture. “I know. So many possibilities. That is part of the trap.” He pointed at her. “You were born free. You were abducted as a babe and purchased as a child. And because that is all you have known, you perpetuate the trap they have created for you.” He tapped his forehead deliberately. “The lock and key are right here. Open them. I know that is asking much from a sullen Romani girl who gets lost in the woods. But truly, Hettie, you have little to lose.”
“What if they kill me?” she asked, her voice barely a whisper.
He glanced at her sharply and snorted. “As if death would not be preferable to living as a slave-servant-wife for the next thirty to forty years?” He chuckled softly and shook his head. “I will, of course, strenuously object to any Romani who comes along and tries to kill you.”
“How thoughtful of you,” she replied sarcastically.
He shrugged deferentially. “I am all kindness, I know. So answer me this. Why has it taken you so many days to drop your sneering and behave?”
“It is the middle of the night, Paedrin. I am too tired for pretenses.”
“So if I am ever to have a normal discussion with you, I must wait until midnight? How uncharitable.”
“If you were not such a braggart and a spleen beetle, I might have talked to you before now.”
“I have never bragged in my entire life!” he said archly.
She elbowed him in the ribs and then caught herself. “I’m sorry. Is that where you were wounded?”
“Good thing the magic healed me first or that would have hurt. You have quite a temper.”
“Yes, but didn’t you drone on about how pain is a teacher?”
Paedrin chuckled. “I could almost grow to like you. But I am afraid that your sulky disposition will forever ruin any chance of that happening.”
“If you have nothing of intelligence to say, then I will get some sleep since you are supposed to be on watch now. You are a braggart, Bhikhu. I know I will always dislike you.”
“I do not care about your good favor, Hettie. But sleep well, all the same. In the morning, we will be good enemies again.”
Hettie crawled over to her bedroll that was near Annon’s and slumped inside with a yawn. There was just enough light from the moon and stars to make out her face, her expression, as she rolled over and faced him.
“I’m sorry if we woke you,” she whispered.
“I was sleeping soundly up until a short while ago. I’m glad we have him with us.”
Paedrin’s voice lifted slightly. “You should be.”
Hettie scowled and shook her head. “Silence, braggart!” she hissed over her shoulder.
Annon thought about the others, prowling the woods for them. “It was not your talking that woke me. Some spirits told me that Kiranrao is hunting us. They did not name him but they said a Vaettir and a group of Preachán were roaming the woods following our trail. If they draw near, I will be warned again.”
Hettie’s expression hardened. “I will help conceal where we camped tonight. There are some things we can do to throw them off.”