I WAITED IMPATIENTLY OUTSIDE THE DRESSING ROOM. My phone hadn't stopped going off since we'd started shopping, and for once I didn't give a rat's ass what any of the guys needed.
I didn't want to be interrupted. I could hear Andi undressing; it was painfully arousing, so much so that I finally pulled out my phone, desperate for a distraction that wouldn't have me breaking down the door and crossing number twelve off that damn list, landing us both in prison for indecent exposure.
Five messages were from Phoenix with strict instructions to yet again check the black folder. Somehow he'd gone from a psychopath with suicidal tendencies to a nagging father figure who wouldn't leave me the hell alone.
I sent him an emoji of a gun back.
He sent me a picture of his middle finger in return.
With a sigh, I clicked through the rest of the messages and paused when I saw one that needed attention.
Nixon: Hand sent out, but two of my men were injured while someone tried to infiltrate the house again.
Me: Did they take anything?
Nixon: No. And this time they just left once they knew nobody was home.
Me: Well that's reassuring.
Nixon: Why the hell are you at Neiman Marcus?
Me: Why the hell do you care? And turn off the damn Find a Friend. It's annoying as hell.
Nixon: Phoenix told me to tell you to read the black folder.
"Ouch!" Andi yelped.
Me: Phoenix can kiss my ass.
I quickly shoved my phone back in my pocket and whistled out a breath of air. "Doing okay in there?"
"Yeah." She was seriously out of breath. Was trying on lingerie an Olympic sport or something? Maybe she wasn't feeling well. My gut clenched.
"It's just that — oh, wow."
"Wow?"
"Italy…" She let out a dark chuckle. "My boobs look amazing in this."
I sighed and gripped the handle to the door. "I bet."
"And my ass?" she added, "looks… firm. Do you think it's firm?"
I banged my head against the door and let out a curse. Whose stupid idea was this? Oh, right. Mine. "Your ass is… firm."
"Ooo!" Clapping came from the other side of the door. "I think I like this lacy bodice thing better. Holy crap, do you think they have a whip that comes with? I could dig that."
I let out a strangled cough as a salesclerk re-entered the dressing area, stopped, then turned around.
At this rate, they were all going to quit by the end of the day.
"Damn." Andi let out a whistle. "You should see this."
I gripped the handle harder. "Can't. It seems my wife's locked me out."
"So pick the lock."
"You can't pick a lock that slides, Andi."
"Hmm, if you were Russian, you could find a way to get in here."
"Are you serious right now?"
"Russians know all the tricks."
I pulled against the lock then slammed my hand against the door while Andi continued talking about her mother country. I half expected her to break out in song.
Desperate, I looked up. I could probably climb over the top. What the hell was I thinking?
With a growl, I glanced down at the floor. At least two feet separated the door and the ground.
Crawling.
I was going to crawl.
On my hands and knees.
Wow, if the guys could see me now.
Shaking my head at myself, I got down on my stomach and slid under the dressing room. My eyes were met with combat boots. Slowly, my eyes inched up Andi's already-dressed form.
"Looking for something?"
"Low…" I shook my head. "…even for you."
She knelt down and blew me a kiss. "I did you a favor. Now for the rest of the day, you can imagine what I looked like — and how you'll get to take off the lingerie tonight."
"I vote now."
"Hmm… maybe later. You said I could shop."
"I regret those words. Really. I do."
She smirked. "I can tell. Now grab the clothes and swipe, swipe, swipe."
With a groan, I moved to my feet and grabbed the hangers off the hooks. My phone buzzed again in my pocket. With a curse, I put the clothes on one arm and answered. "Kinda busy, Nixon."
"Shopping, I know."
I rolled my eyes. "What did you need?"
"The men said the alarm was de-activated."
"The house alarm?" I blinked. "But that's impossible. Only a few people know the code — me, Jules, and Andi." I hadn't exactly told Andi the alarm code but figured she knew it because she'd watched me plug it in.
"And Jules was one of the guys that was knocked out," Nixon grumbled. "So how did they get in the house without tripping the alarm?"
I narrowed my eyes at Andi; she was busy petting the clothes on my arm. No way would she do that, and I hated myself that I'd even thought it.
"I'll figure it out," I huffed. "That all?"
"Yeah. And Sergio?"
"What?" I barked.
"It's good to see you showing interest…"
"In Andi?"
"In clothes."
"Bite me."
I hung up while he laughed his ass off.
****
"You weren't kidding about those mimosas." Andi yawned behind her hand as we walked through Lincoln Park. I'd originally thought to take her to the zoo since she had that odd fascination with animals, but after seeing how tired she was, I decided to save it for another day.
"Well…" I held in my chuckle. "…when you have five of them…"