I stiffened. “Why didn’t you tell me about your brother? Why did you lie to me?” I spoke very fast and very quietly, and to be honest, I half hoped that he wouldn’t hear me in all the racket of the cafeteria. But my words wiped the smile off his face.
“You’ve been reading Secrecy’s blog.” He let go of me and sighed. “One of these days I’ll find out who she is, and then I’ll wring her neck with my own hands. Don’t you want any lunch?”
Silently, I shook my head. Persephone was sitting at our table now with Arthur, Eric, and Gabriel. You could see her red cheeks all the way from where I was. An hour ago, I’d felt ravenous, what with missing breakfast, but suddenly my stomach was churning. “Can we go somewhere else? Where no one can hear us?”
Henry sighed again. “Listen, about Milo … why would I bother you with that?”
“Yes, why would you bother me with things that worry you?” I repeated, putting as much sarcasm as I could manage into my voice. “I’m only your girlfriend. Why would you tell me what goes on at your home, or what really is on your mind? Why would you introduce me to your family?”
“I do tell you what’s really on my mind,” said Henry. “No one should know me better than you do.”
I laughed indignantly. “I suppose that’s a joke, is it?” Henry looked hurt, but I couldn’t stop for that now. “Even Secrecy knows more about you than I do.”
“Heaven only knows where she got that from.” Henry ran his hand through his untidy hair. “Anyway, it wasn’t even perfume—it was a stupid fragranced candle. Jasmine and vanilla, what a nasty combination. Don’t you want to know what I’ve found out about our friend Senator Tod?”
“No,” I said. By now I didn’t mind that we were in the middle of the cafeteria. Anyway, only the students at the table right next to us could hear what we were saying. And they were talking at the tops of their voices about the latest Arsenal football match. “I’d like to know why I’ve never been to your home. Why I don’t know your parents or any of their other kids except for Amy, in her dream. Do you have some kind of problem with me?”
“No, Liv! Of course not.” Henry was staring at me, horrified.
“Or do you think none of that is anything to do with me?”
He frowned. “Hey, not everyone has such an uncomplicated family as yours.”
“Uncomplicated?” I couldn’t be hearing this properly. “My parents are divorced, my mom is living with the new man in her life, his daughter hates us like poison—”
“You’re the Sunshine Family,” Henry interrupted me. “Everything about you is warm, clean, and friendly, you’re all fond of one another—Florence doesn’t count—there’s always home baking on the table, even your dog could be straight out of an ad. Whereas we are the Drizzling Rain Family. Or maybe the Hailstorm Family. Milo steals fragranced candles, my four-year-old sister calls every man who crosses her path Daddy, my mother only ever bakes when she’s been swallowing too many antidepressants, even our cat’s gone out of her mind. She’s stopped being house-trained, so the cleaning lady has given notice. Why would I think it might be a good idea to take you home to our place? So that you can see it all with your own eyes?”
Although he spoke quietly, the intensity of his words took my breath away for a couple of seconds. “Yes,” I said then, looking him firmly in the eye. Oh, I loved him so much. And I felt so, so sorry about his mother having to take antidepressants, not to mention the cat.…
For a little while, we just stood facing each other in silence.
“Oh, Livvy…” Henry put a strand of hair back from my forehead, very slowly. For the first time since I’d known him, he looked vulnerable, and for the first time, I wished I was the big, broad-shouldered one so that I could simply comfort him by holding him close. I almost started to cry, but I managed to blink back the tears. After all, there was no reason to cry, it was just because I was so tired. And hungry.
“It could be that your cat just feels neglected,” I said, talking very fast so that Henry wouldn’t notice anything. “My aunt Gertrude had that problem once. With Tipsy. Or maybe it was Patsy. Anyway, she called in an animal psychologist, and now Tabby is just fine again. Or Tibby as the case may be.”
This time when Henry smiled, it was that very special smile meant just for me, the smile I liked more than anything else in the world.