The waitress came around and started taking orders. All the men were asking for the Behemoths.
When she looked at Jim, he put his arm around my shoulders.
“We’ll have two of the Behemoths, medium, and two beers.”
The waitress made a note on her pad then looked at Carlos. He reached over and knocked Jim’s arm from me before ordering.
“A Behemoth. Medium, please,” he said as Jim laughed.
Amusement drifted from most of the group. But not from Grey, who sat across from us. A thread of worry tickled my awareness. I glanced at him and the thread disappeared, even though he wasn’t looking at me to notice my attention.
The rest of the group finished ordering. Within a few minutes, the waitress started to bring out the drinks. When she set mine in front of me, I asked if she could bring me water, too.
As soon as she left, I pushed the beer toward Jim.
“Can’t,” he said. “I’m driving.”
“I don’t drink,” I said again.
“Maybe you should.”
“You’re not a good influence.”
He winked and nudged the beer back my way. I shook my head.
“If I drink, my guard slips. People get hurt when my guard slips.”
Jim leaned back in his chair.
“You’ve never let loose?”
His aghast tone definitely felt staged.
“Once. I put the bar to sleep.”
“I’ll drink yours,” Bethi said, reaching across the table. She’d just sat down again with the drink in hand when Luke snagged the bottle and drained it.
“Not today,” he said, setting the empty bottle next to her plate.
“Killjoy.”
Jim sighed and absently scratched his chest.
“We should have ordered appetizers.”
At the far end of the table, Charlene and Winifred started discussing hotel options for the night. They pulled Gabby and Michelle into the conversation. Bethi and Luke were having a stare down. No doubt over the beer.
That left our end of the table pretty quiet.
“Have you ever been to New York?” Grey asked when I met his gaze.
“No. This is the furthest I’ve ever traveled from home.”
“Are there any sights you want to see?” Carlos asked.
“I doubt there will be time for that. Sounds like it will be a lot more hotel fun.”
My response seemed to kill the conversation attempt. It was fine with me. I stared at my placemat and remembered playing tic-tac-toe with Ethan. My chest started to hurt. I embraced it; I never wanted to forget.
By the time the burgers arrived twenty minutes later, I wasn’t very hungry. I nibbled on some fries and managed a few bites of my burger. Before Jim could snag the Behemoth from my plate, Carlos took it and set it on his. Jim grumbled, and took the remaining fries.
When the waitress came back around asking about refills, Carlos asked for a to-go box. I glanced at him.
“You’ll be hungry later,” he said.
We left the restaurant and only managed to drive a few miles when the vehicles ahead of us pulled into a tavern. We were the only cars in the gravel parking lot.
Carlos frowned but pulled in behind the rest.
“What’s going on?” I asked.
“Jim. He needs the bathroom.”
Sure enough, the driver’s side door opened, and Jim jogged toward the building. I watched him disappear inside, then turned to keep staring out the window.
After a few minutes, Carlos growled and turned off the car.
I glanced at him. He didn’t look at me. His tight hold on the steering wheel conveyed something. But what?
“Are you impatient, annoyed, angry?”
“All of the above.”
“Why?”
“Jim’s been in there for five minutes. Grey said he’s not answering the Elders.”
“So?”
“We don’t have time for his fooling around.”
“You sound like you know Jim.”
“I grew up with him.”
“Why doesn’t someone go in to check on him?”
“Because that’s most likely what he wants.”
I shook my head and opened the door.
“Isabelle, wait.”
I ignored Carlos and started toward the building. When I was almost to the entrance, I heard Carlos open his door to follow. I pushed my way into the tavern and spotted Jim at the bar. He had a row of shots lined up. When he saw me, he spread his arms wide.
“Time to let loose. There’s no one in here.”
Except the bartender, but I didn’t point that out. I reached Jim and glanced at the shots.
“Carlos is annoyed with you.” No doubt, Luke would be too. There were twenty little cups waiting. I doubted Luke would keep Bethi from them all.
“Really? That’s new.”
I couldn’t tell if Jim was being sarcastic or not.
“The rest are going to be annoyed with you, too.”
“Not if you stick up for me.”
“And why would I do that?” I asked, looking up at him.
“Because deep down, you want to let go for a little while.” He grabbed a shot and held it out to me.
His sudden seriousness brought back the ache in my chest. He was right. I desperately wanted to let go of the pain and loneliness. I took the shot and tossed it back just as the door opened.