“Come here.” The softly spoken command made my stomach flip weirdly.
I took another step and gasped when Carlos blurred before me. One second he was five feet away; the next, he was coming at me with open hands. He brushed my forearm, and I batted him away. He caressed my bare shoulder, and I jabbed him in the gut. He leaned in, and I freaked out and slapped his face.
Why did I always go girly on him? Next time, aim for the nuts, I scolded myself.
The slap did the trick, though. He straightened away, and the shaking eased.
“I apologize,” he said.
Then he left the room.
“What the hell was that?”
Unfortunately, the exercise equipment had less of an answer than I did.
I took my time walking back to the room and opened the door warily. Ethan lay back on the bed, his head propped up with several pillows. The room was otherwise empty.
When he heard the door click, Ethan turned and looked me over.
“Looks like Carlos worked you good. I like it when you’re all sweaty,” he said, grinning at me.
I stepped into the room and closed the door behind me.
“Yeah. I’m empty for real, this time.” But I shouldn’t have been. As soon as Carlos had started acting weird, I should have started pulling. Even though I couldn’t pull from Carlos, there had probably been other people nearby. Enough to feed me the energy I would have needed to protect myself. Why hadn’t I tried?
I crossed the room and grabbed some clean clothes out of the bag.
“I’m hitting the shower.”
“Want some help?”
“Keep dreaming,” I said; and, with a laugh, I closed myself into the bathroom.
When I came out several minutes later, clean and refreshed, Ethan hadn’t moved.
“So, are we going to talk about the big guy?” Ethan said without taking his eyes from the TV.
“What do you mean?”
“He keeps watching you. You move; his eyes follow.”
“Yeah, right.” I stretched out next to Ethan on the bed. It felt good to lie down despite the recent nap. Some days that felt like my routine. Sleep, eat, exercise, repeat.
The show Ethan watched didn’t interest me, so I closed my eyes.
“I’m serious,” he said. “What do you feel from him?”
“Nothing.”
“Ever?”
“Ever.”
“Don’t you find it weird that he doesn’t have any emotions to pull? You always said you couldn’t be with anyone because you’d drain the guy. Z, you can’t drain him.”
I opened my eyes and turned to look at Ethan. He was still facing the TV. He looked relaxed, and I couldn’t feel anything from him, but his words told me he was feeling something. What, though? Worry? I gave a little pull, testing his hold.
“Don’t, Z.”
“Then tell me what’s going on in that head of yours.”
He turned and met my gaze.
“I never had you, and I’m losing you.”
My heart went “aw!” and my brain went “oh, crap.” I took a moment to sort through the two emotions.
“You’ve always had me, and you always will.”
“You know what I mean.”
“I’ve never loved anyone more than I love you, Ethan. What we have has to be enough. If it’s not, if you push for more, I’ll leave because I love you. I won’t hurt you.” Guilt hit me. “More than I already do.”
He closed his eyes and heaved a sigh.
“I can handle a bruise from a girl.” The derogatory way he said that made me smile. He lifted his right arm and pulled me to his side. I gently laid my head on his chest, avoiding his bruised shoulder.
Soft sounds brushed my consciousness enough to pull me from sleep. I lifted my head from Ethan’s chest. The room was dark, and Ethan breathed evenly beside me. The clock showed it was the middle of the night.
The hushed rustling stopped. No doubt one of the other two had shifted in their sleep.
I eased myself from Ethan’s side and stood, needing to go to the bathroom. I kept my hand on the mattress to guide my way around the bed. Where was the light from the hall? I didn’t think hotel rooms got so dark. I moved slowly, so I wouldn’t trip on anything.
A thread of worry soured the air, and I paused by the end of the bed. Someone wasn’t sleeping.
“Who’s awake?”
I strained to hear something and was rewarded by a whisper of noise right in front of me. Something brushed my cheek. I jumped a little, and a hand gently cupped my bruised jaw. I knew the hand...that gentle touch. My pulse leapt when both of his large hands cradled my face, and his fingers burrowed into my hair.
His hold should have made me feel trapped or threatened. However, I felt anything but. For a moment, neither of us moved. Then, his thumb brushed over my lower lip.
My breathing hitched, and my lips parted in surprise. I felt him move closer as his thumb continued its soft caress.
“Z?”
Ethan’s tired voice stopped the gentle touch on my mouth, and the fingers at the back of my head twitched.